The secrets of Kilominiga

[Nasty Plasty]

Prologue: This is the story of Kilominiga. It is an ancient spiritual techinque that involves stealing the essence of objects and combining it with your own body. A group of ten students of one Sukio Mosha have been studying to master this art. They all had high expectations except for one. Daniel was too busy sticking pencils up his nose. He was released after 2 years of training. They left him for dead. He had nothing to do but honr his skills. He stayed in hiding for fear of being found and killed. Another five years after that, Daniel watched the graduation ceremony from high in the trees. Soon the sky began to darken and metoers rained from the sky. Daniel watched as strange creatures killed thousands of people including Sukio Mosha. Daniel let out a yell and was heard by the students. Despite him being failed by Sukio, Daniel still mourned him. Daniel now had the nine students after him, the life of his former-teacher to avenge, and the world to save. Can he do it or will he be killed?

[NightBreaker]

What I have to say:

-Use Microsoft Word, I advise you.
-Make sense
-describe you characters. Daniel could have pink hair with long curls or tutu and a shoe on his head for all we know. He could have been in the forest for 80 years and it was his 917 birthday when his master got killed. Is sukio a guy or girl?
-write it longer, I don't read short stories, I read long ones .... very long ones *eyes glint evilly*

I find it kinda confusing. Student fails. Student and classmates watches teacher get killed. Student wants to avenge teacher and save the world. Classmates want to kill student because he failed. That's how the world goes round ... or my eyes. :rolleyes:

Overall, I find it pretty interesting though and would like to see how this turns out.