View Full Version : Small Surprises

Manjoume Jun
07-19-2004, 07:24 AM
Here we go, capture time!

Small Surprises
We join Leonard as he ventures through the dark, dank tunnels of the Subterranean Sector during his search for Slab City, the sector's capital.

"Brr, it's g-gettin' pretty ch-chilly down here!" Leonard struggled to say through chattering teeth, "How did we end up down here in the first place Zangoose?" he continued to say as his faithful companion looked back at him with it's confident eyes, but Leonard knew that beneath that stern exterior was a Pokémon that was also feeling the chill.
"Zan, zangoose!" it shouted as it fell on all-fours and leapt off through the tunnel and into the darkness.
"Zangoose! Wait up! What's wrong?" Leonard wondered as his slow footsteps turned to a desperate run. As Leonard caught up to his Pokémon he noticed what Zangoose had been chasing all this time.
"Zangoose, zan, zangoose!" it said as it faced Leonard while pointing to a small pipe that was sticking up from the floor. It was a dim purple color, with various patches of rust forming around its rim.
"Down there?" Leonard questioned, "What is it? You mean there's something down there? Is that what you're trying to say?" he continued. Zangoose just nodded as it fell to it's knees as it tried to listen to something from within the pipe.
"What can you hear?" Leonard asked.
"Ssss. Eeep, eeep. Ssss. Sne, sel, sne, sne." many different voices could be heard as Leonard tried to listen in as well.
"There must be quite a few Pokémon down there, and it sounds like one of them isn't enjoying the party." Leonard commented. Zangoose then got up and extended it's razor-like claws, as it focused itself for some kind of attack.
"What are you up to? I really have a hard time predicting your actions at times Zangoose." Leonard said until suddenly, Zangoose leapt up into the air, it's claws glowing a brilliant white colour, which it then slammed down onto the pipe which cracked apart.
"Ssss!! Sne, sne, sne, sne, sneasel!!" the voices shouted, they had obviously been alerted to this turn of events.
"Zangoose! What the heck was that in aid of?" Leonard said in a panicked tone, but Zangoose merely looked onwards down the pipe they were standing in, as it raised it's claws for battle.
"Oh dear, this doesn't look good!" said a scared Leonard as a large amount of shining eyes from down the pipe could be seen approaching very quickly.
"Zaaaaan-goose!" Zangoose said as it readied itself for an attack. The oncoming army finally revealed itself to be a rather large group of Seviper and Sneasel, and they were very angry at the interruption which Zangoose had caused.
"Well, if we've got to fight, then bring it on! Zangoose, Quick Attack!" Leonard commanded, and so Zangoose immediately leapt forwards and into the flurry of Pokémon as merely a red and white blur. Suddenly, the 3 Sneasel from the group stopped dead in their tracks, as they all fell to their knees while large gashes appeared on their chests. But the Seviper were still on the rampage, and they were heading for Leonard!
"Ah, Zangoose! Help me!" Leonard cried as he tried to escape from a barrage of Poison Tail attacks. As the glowing purple tails flashed past Leonard, Zangoose got up from it's previous attack and turned around.
"Zangoose!!!" it yelled at the top of it's lungs. And at this moment, the Seviper slowed to a halt, and turned to face Zangoose with anger brimming in their eyes.
"Of course, Zangoose can attract the attention of the Seviper merely by alerting them to it's presence. They're so caught up in their life-long rivalry, that they won't listen to anyone or anything else until the battle is over!" said Leonard triumphantly as Zangoose prepared itself for another attack.
"Zangoose! Use your Crush Claw attack to pound those Seviper!" shouted Leonard, but Zangoose didn't need telling as it had already begun using it's Crush Claw attack against the now-charging pack of Seviper.
"Ssssev-iper!!!" they hissed as they writhed themselves at top-speed towards the oncoming red and white cat-ferret Pokémon. But it was too late, with a battle cry and a flash of white light, Zangoose hacked it's way through each of the Seviper with ease, and as they fell to the ground in a deep state of unconsciousness, Zangoose merely stood up on it's hind legs and let out a sigh of relief.
"Nice one Zangoose! You took out the lot of them! Awesome!" Leonard cheered as Zangoose smiled at it's trainer.
"Zan, zan, zan!" it yelped.
"Eeep, eeep, eeep!!" the last voice continued.
"Oh yeah, I forgot about that, the Pokémon that sounds like it's in trouble. Hang on little guy, we're coming!" Leonard said reassuringly as he started to run down the tunnel where the Seviper and Sneasel had first emerged, with Zangoose following close behind. As they turned round a long corner, they emerged in a lit room with various broken boxes, empty cages, and pieces of fruit that had been discarded by the invasion of Pokémon.
"Eeep, eeep!" the voice cried.
"There it is! In that large cage in the back!" Leonard said as he noticed a large, steel cage in the back of the room. As Leonard and Zangoose approached the cage it was revealed that the crying had come from an Aron, but there was something strange about it.
"Um, Zangoose, are Aron supposed to be green? And wh are it's eyes red?" Leonard wondered, as Zangoose stood beside him, looking curiously at the small Pokémon.
"Zan?" Zangoose said with an essence of surprise in it's voice.
"This must be a pretty rare occurance, Aron are normally just a silvery-grey colour, with blue eyes. I've gotta' capture this one!" Leonard said excitedly, "But first to get it outta' this cage."
"Zangoose!" Zangoose cried, as it understood what Leonard wanted, and with a flicker of it's claws it burst the cage open with a Slash attack.
"Nice one Zangoose!" Leonard cheered, but suddenly the Aron started to cry again.
"Eeep!!! Eeeep!!!" it screamed as it started to kick up dust from the floor.
"Oh dear, I think we scared it! It looks like it wants to fight you Zangoose. Are you up to it?" Leonard asked, but Zangoose once again had that fierce look of determination in it's face, it was ready for a fight.
"Zan, zan, zangoose!" it shouted as it once again revealed it's reaper-like claws and slid into it's customary battle stance.
"Eeep, eeep!!!" Aron shouted as it charged towards Zangoose at full speed.
"Zangoose! Dodge it and use Slash attack!" Leonard commanded, and so Zangoose jumped out of the way of Aron's powerful Tackle attack, which caused it to decimate some wooden boxes that were lying behind Zangoose at the time. Zangoose then leapt forwards with it's claws brandished, and let rip a full blown attack against Aron, but it did seemingly nothing to the tiny Pokémon's steel armour.
"Darn, I forgot! Aron is a Steel and Rock-type Pokémon. Physical attacks aren't gonna' do anything without any kind of assistance." said Leonard worriedly, "Zangoose, Swords Dance!" and as he said this, 7 shining swords materialised around Zangoose and started to spin around it, causing's it's arms to bulk up to a much larger proportion.
"Zan-goose!" it yelled as it readied itself for another attack.
"Now then, try a Crush Claw attack, go Zangoose!" Leonard demanded. But Aron had recovered from it's previous encounter with the wall and was ready for more. Zangoose smashed into Aron with all of it's might, and this time it seemed to be hurting Aron quite a bit as it could be seen wincing in pain.
"That was good Zangoose! Now, try to weaken it further with a Focus Punch attack! Just make sure it doesn't hit you!" Leonard continued, so Zangoose just stood there calmly, trying to gather as much power as it possibly could for the next attack. But Aron wasn't patient enough to wait for the attack to commence, so it began kicking up more dust again before charging into another Tackle attack.
"No, Zangoose! Here it comes!" Leonard panicked as the small metal Pokémon closed in on Zangoose's position.
"Eeep!!!" it squealed as it was about to connect until...
"Zan-goose!!!" Zangoose screamed as it's eyes opened, it's fists clenched, and it swung them at Aron with a devastatingly explosive force that hurled the charging chunk of steel into the wall opposite, causing multiple slabs of rubble to fall on top of it.
"Oh no! Have we gone too far? It could really be hurt under all of those rocks." Leonard realised in a very concerned tone, "Zangoose! Help me to lift up the rocks from on top of Aron!" he shouted, and Zangoose complied immediately. So Leonard and Zangoose worked at lifting stone after stone from the pile, until the Aron underneath was able to pull itself out from the remaining rubble.
"It looks really hurt..." said Leonard as he watched the poor Pokémon hobble out from the wreckage.
"Zan..." Zangoose said with a sense of guilt to it's voice.
"Don't worry Zangoose, I know you didn't intend to hurt it THAT much." Leonard reassured it, "Hey there little guy." he said to Aron.
"E-eep..." it said weakly.
"I'm sorry about hurting you so much. If you want to, you can come with me and Zangoose and we can get you healed at the Pokémon Center in Slab City! Whaddya' say?" Leonard asked.
"Eeep..." Aron managed to squeal as it tried to make up it's mind...

to be continued...

Well, I know that I'm normally supposed to end up throwing the Poké Ball, and then you decide whether or not it stays in, but instead I'm leaving it up to you as to whether this shiny Aron decides to come with Leonard or not, and if so, then it can join my URPG team!

The decision is yours to make...

07-19-2004, 08:59 AM
Hmm, interesting story.

Reality: One Zangoose against a troop of Seviper followed by an Aron. Most likely, it would have passed out by now. Pokemon are powerful, but they aren't immortal.

Creativity: Regular find and capture story with slight opposition. There is no mention of how they got there in the first place.

Length: The battle was short with little description. Also, the paragraphs were all squished together making the entire story difficult to read.

Detail: Very little detail here. I could see the story progress, but there was nothing special that seemed to amaze me.

Grammar: The grammar in the story was excellent.

Overall: This story seemed average. There was nothing that caught my attention. It was too short with sparse detail.

Aron not captured.