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View Full Version : Jelousy, envy, my imagination, call it what you want, I'm loseing my friends


RocketMeowth
03-01-2007, 02:21 AM
Nya.

I have a good amount of friends. They all loved my art and they all liked being around me. But after I introduced my best friend whom I've known since fourth grade, to Tiffany (a nineth grader who I befriended back when I was in nineth grade), all my friendships have begun sprialling down in a vortex of missery.

I never even knew that I could become as jelous as I am right now. Tiffany makes friends so easilly. She befirended all of my friends in less then a month when it took me six years to befriend them all. Also, all of my friends run to her to greet her and ignore me when I'm standing right there. Like I don't even exist. And now, they go all out for her art and say virtually **** about mine. It's like I'm being replaced by the one person I introduced to them all.

Miranda is the only one who has satyed a true friend to me. But I feel that even she, who I feel is like a sister to me, is slowly slipping away.

At lunch, Tiffany always brings out her sketchbook (we sit at a circular table by the way). I sit virtually right next to her and Miranda and Ashley (another friend) sit across from me and Tiffany. Anywyas, Tiffany always shows them her sketches as does Ashely (another artist) but, they never show me. They don't even ask if I want to see them.

I jsut feel like I am being forgotten about. The only way I can gt them to look at my art is if I hold it up and say, "Hey (place name here) look at this!" is a semi loud tone.

I'm jsut really scared that I'm actually losing all of my friends and again returning to that dark void where the only voices I hear are those who mach me.

=;_;= Nya

Elmo's Heaven!!
03-01-2007, 02:23 AM
No offense, but I think Tiffany is a total *****.

Espeon EX
03-01-2007, 02:29 AM
Some friends can be like that, I've lost a few, but what i've read, it was painful, but loosing all of your friends? thats terrable, If all my friends left, I'd have nothing to do and have no one to talk with, I'm jealous of 1 friend of mine, he has like 5 girlfriends.

Charbok
03-01-2007, 02:32 AM
this actually is quite a common feeling among high schoolers. i havent felt it yet, but im only a freshman (ive been reading my moms psych books) and personally its become something like this, (my analogies are strange, but just listen) Originally, you were a special pink colored penguin, and people noticed you more than they noticed other penguins because everyone else is red, and you are pink. however, a new green penguin has joined the group and people notice it more because 1. They are more used to you, and 2. Green is more different from red than pink is. Now that this new penguin has come onto the glacier, there isnt enough room for the other pink penguin on it, so they push you off and into the water to get eaten by a shark. Before you get pushed into the water, you have to paint yourself a new defferent color, so they will notice you and bring you back in.

Translation: Just because a new person has come into your group doenst mean you should be out of it, this much is obvious. You have 2 options, paint yourself a diffrerent color, (find something cool about you and show it off) or make more room on the "glacier" (make very good friends with one of the people in the group, and then that person will make room for you in the group)

Hope that this helps! :wink:

~Charbok

Anorexic Snorlax
03-01-2007, 02:36 AM
Wow, RM. I feel your pain. I'm losing my friends for a different reason, but I know it hurts.

On the other hand, Tiffiny seems like a girl who made your life miserable.

RocketMeowth
03-01-2007, 02:38 AM
@ Charbok: It would help if...if there was more of me to express. All of my friends know everything about me.

And I already have a very good friend in the group. Miranda. She is like my sister. We've been friends for seven years. She isn't venturing further from me as rapidly as my other friends are but, I feel that slowly, she is.

@AS: She isn't meaning to do it but, it's happening. And so far, there hasn't been any type of solution to fix this.

Spartan MK-6
03-01-2007, 02:43 AM
Some friends can be like that, I've lost a few, but what i've read, it was painful, but loosing all of your friends? thats terrable, If all my friends left, I'd have nothing to do and have no one to talk with, I'm jealous of 1 friend of mine, he has like 5 girlfriends.

meh, one of my friends has had it dry before, but im not really jealous of that, i just want true love, not just someone to f**k

Nya.

I have a good amount of friends. They all loved my art and they all liked being around me. But after I introduced my best friend whom I've known since fourth grade, to Tiffany (a nineth grader who I befriended back when I was in nineth grade), all my friendships have begun sprialling down in a vortex of missery.

I never even knew that I could become as jelous as I am right now. Tiffany makes friends so easilly. She befirended all of my friends in less then a month when it took me six years to befriend them all. Also, all of my friends run to her to greet her and ignore me when I'm standing right there. Like I don't even exist. And now, they go all out for her art and say virtually **** about mine. It's like I'm being replaced by the one person I introduced to them all.

Miranda is the only one who has satyed a true friend to me. But I feel that even she, who I feel is like a sister to me, is slowly slipping away.

At lunch, Tiffany always brings out her sketchbook (we sit at a circular table by the way). I sit virtually right next to her and Miranda and Ashley (another friend) sit across from me and Tiffany. Anywyas, Tiffany always shows them her sketches as does Ashely (another artist) but, they never show me. They don't even ask if I want to see them.

I jsut feel like I am being forgotten about. The only way I can gt them to look at my art is if I hold it up and say, "Hey (place name here) look at this!" is a semi loud tone.

I'm jsut really scared that I'm actually losing all of my friends and again returning to that dark void where the only voices I hear are those who mach me.

=;_;= Nya


thats kinda happening with me too, one of my main friends has gone emo, i hardly talk to him anymore, and i havent heard from or seen another for half a year, and another is a total girl freak, he has no interest in the stuff i like, like halo, need for speed e.t.c, and my best friend, we're kinda drifting away too, its pretty sad, but in the process of losing friends, im gaining more different friends, which is good i guess.

Charbok
03-01-2007, 02:43 AM
@ Charbok: It would help if...if there was more of me to express. All of my friends know everything about me.

And I already have a very good friend in the group. Miranda. She is like my sister. We've been friends for seven years. She isn't venturing further from me as rapidly as my other friends are but, I feel that slowly, she is.


For every step she takes back, you should take two steps forward.

RocketMeowth
03-01-2007, 02:51 AM
For every step she takes back, you should take two steps forward.

Easy for you to say. You weren't the most made fun kid in your entire school for six years running now were you?

My social skills are at 1
My self confidence level is getting lower by the minute from added pressure and from the small amount of maching that still goes on

I'm in a state of utter denial. And don't tell me to talk to a psychiatrist. I already did that when I nearly went insane back in tenth grade.

And I'm serious about that insane part.

Spartan MK-6
03-01-2007, 02:55 AM
Easy for you to say. You weren't the most made fun kid in your entire school for six years running now were you?

My social skills are at 1
My self confidence level is getting lower by the minute from added pressure and from the small amount of maching that still goes on

I'm in a state of utter denial. And don't tell me to talk to a psychiatrist. I already did that when I nearly went insane back in tenth grade.

And I'm serious about that insane part.

meh, i think my social skills are like negative 10, i cant even look at someone properly unless its one of my few friends, and ive had numerous meltdowns at times, and people tease me too, they call me frankenstein just coz my brain part of my head is a bit bigger than theirs.

RocketMeowth
03-01-2007, 03:00 AM
meh, i think my social skills are like negative 10, i cant even look at someone properly unless its one of my few friends, and ive had numerous meltdowns at times, and people tease me too, they call me frankenstein just coz my brain part of my head is a bit bigger than theirs.

I'm not goign to go into how I was mached but, I will say that some of it involved physicall abuse that the principals never even dealt with.

Sorry for all this negativity. I need a place to say all of this without actually having to say it.

Elmo's Heaven!!
03-01-2007, 03:05 AM
I'm not goign to go into how I was mached but, I will say that some of it involved physicall abuse that the principals never even dealt with.

Sorry for all this negativity. I need a place to say all of this without actually having to say it.
Wow RM, I never knew so much about you until now. I mean, you seem like such a cool person here! I think you need a hug! :3

Spartan MK-6
03-01-2007, 03:07 AM
I'm not goign to go into how I was mached but, I will say that some of it involved physicall abuse that the principals never even dealt with.

Sorry for all this negativity. I need a place to say all of this without actually having to say it.

ive seen/heard more negativity than this, trust me.

ive havent been physically abused much, but it seems most people just want to tear me apart from the inside

Neo Emolga
03-01-2007, 03:47 AM
Easy for you to say. You weren't the most made fun kid in your entire school for six years running now were you?

My social skills are at 1
My self confidence level is getting lower by the minute from added pressure and from the small amount of maching that still goes on

I'm in a state of utter denial. And don't tell me to talk to a psychiatrist. I already did that when I nearly went insane back in tenth grade.

And I'm serious about that insane part.

I can honestly say, Iíve been bullied and made fun of starting from the first grade, pretty much all the way to my sophomore year of high school. Iíve been kicked, Iíve been pushed, and Iíve had plenty of stupid, nasty, and embarrassing things done to me. It all happened, believe it. Truth be told, when I come here and get the massive amount of respect from people, I feel Iíve been seriously making up for lost time. My childhood SUCKED ASS, Iíll say it right now. Because of it all, Iíve been extremely selective with who I hang out with. To the very end, I never hung out with anyone, mostly because I was still overcome with the belief that everyone out there wouldnít at all make a potential friend after all Iíve faced.

Back then, I wasnít proud of myself either, and I hated my overall appearance. People would make fun of every single damn aspect about me and how awful and stupid of a person I really was. Not surprisingly, I enjoyed individualism over the years and the independence to do whatever I wanted. You could probably even laugh at me and say that its true I have no real life friends anymore after dealing with so many people that were such scum. I never fought back because I was so afraid of getting into trouble, so distance was the best defense.

RM, you may have never been there to see it all happen throughout the years, but it did happen, and I know what its like to be in a position where it seems everyone you interact with has shunned you. But after reading all that, I think I might know what the problem is.

If theyíre really your friends, they need to like you as a person. Sure, art is a great way to impress them, but it canít all be material. I could show a bunch of guys my Flash animations and they might be impressed for five minutes, but theyíve got to like my sense of companionship if weíre really going to be buddies.

Take the friendship well beyond the art. Introduce them to things that are new and you both enjoy doing that Tiffany canít touch the way you can, because youíre you and thatís something she can never amount to. She can never have the same friendly, outgoing, and compassionate personality you have. Do stuff with them, and have a great time with them. But if you really want to go for it, make it about your friends. Donít ask them to take a look at your art, ask them to show them stuff that theyíve done to you. Make it about them, and show interest in that person and what they do. And in turn, maybe theyíll ask to see what youíve done in the past. Explore their life more, and make it about them. And when they see theyíre getting that attention and they can share their experiences with someone who they can trust and enjoy being around with, thatís a real friendship.

I know, I havenít had too many friends in the past, but I get along with people. Iím not the laughing stock I used to be. Whenever I call a customer at work on the phone, I always leave a good impression, even knowing I may never actually see that person, and that one phone call is all they will ever hear from me.

Truthfully, I began at the way bottom when I first arrived at PE2K, no one knowing me, and me knowing no one. Still, I knew what I had done wrong in the past when trying to associate with people, and rather than keeping that distance that I did before, I wanted to interact more with the people I saw. I wanted to be someone to them, and to mean something to the people I talked with. So, rather than waiting for them to be interested in me, I stepped forward and became interested with them instead. I wanted to know them better, and while I knew that friends come and go, I knew we could enjoy the ride together. And yet, there are always those precious few that you should hold onto.

Donít let this let you down, RM. Youíre a great and interesting person, youíre fun and friendly, and you know how to treat people right. Even if this doesnít work out and these people move on, you have the heart and courage to make plenty of great quality friends in the future.

Youíll find the people youíre looking forÖ

RocketMeowth
03-01-2007, 04:01 AM
Neo, what you just told me...thank you. Thank you to you and everyone who posted here about this.

I'll do what you told me to Neo. It'll be hard since I have issues being the one to step up but, I'll try. Hopefully I don't lose all my friends.

I wish I could say more but, I can't seem to sum up the feelings that I have within me right now into words.

Heh, I guess that that is another thing you could add on about me. I can get really upset but, if I am told the right things in jsut the right way, I can heal faster then I typed out the very first post to this thread.

I thank you all again. Your words meant a lot to me even though my posts didn't show it.

=^^= Nya <33

Knightblazer
03-01-2007, 05:05 AM
Heh, RM... I sure can feel the same.

I've never been a popluar kid in class. Heck, I'm actually teased aty school 24/7. Just a month back I had to see a councillor for wrecking a table, a chair, my ruler and pens when I got very ticked off with a bunch of classmates who teased and said miserable stuff about me. I simply snapped that day. But then again, that's besides the point.

Anyway, what I wanna say is that, yeah, try to make friends who really appreciate you. I only have about two or three at school, among the thousand here, that I can really call as a friend. The rest simply tease me, from my level to one beyond. It really gets on my nerves, but I manage, even if it's the guy I really hate most (and he exists). Despite the fact that people always associate me with dirty jokes (very dirty ones too, mind) I have to say I'm a bit soft hearted, for I will try to help everyone that comes by me, but I don't expect anything in return. But then they'll still tease me and all, and I have to deal with it.

That's basically one of the reasons why I like coming here. everyone here is very cool, and accepct me as who I am. granted, I came not really as a nobody, but satill, a lot of people here never even knew me, like Scott or Neo himself, but I took the courage to mingle with people here and became the person I am today. A lot of people in real life treat me as nothing but a laughingstock, and while I dop get the occoasional temper, I will always try to cool and ingore them.

So, RM, don't let things like this get ya down. Try to let them see who your really are on the inside; your personality, your hobbies and all. And there will always be a someone who'll accepct and understand you, like your family. =)

Knightblazer

RocketMeowth
03-01-2007, 07:39 PM
Thanks KB. I'll put what you and everyone else told me away in the fileing cabinet in my noggin.

Also, there was a major event today during lunch that really showed me how much my friends actually care about me.

There is this girl at our school named Destiny. But I (and a bunch of other people) know her as a ****, hore, skank, and a *****. Well, today I was heading to my table and as usuall, my eyes were glued to my drawing book. I was able to see if there were people in front of me so I wouldn't bump into them but, somehow mrs. slutty skanky bitchy hore got passed my line of site and tripped me into a chair. I hit it pretty hard and fell to the floor. My art book fell out of my hands and well....I had lose papers in them so yeah, it was like giant pieces of conffetti day. Even the chair was knocked over.

My friends saw the hole thing and they got up, walked up to Destiny, blocking her from getting to me. Aparently she was aiming to beat me up becasue she's a sluty skanky bitchy hore. -.-

Well anywyas, my friends to her to f*** off and leave me alone. Due to her being a slutty skanky bitchy hore, oh and stubborn too, she refused. Then Tiffany got a proctor and Mrs. SLuty skanky bitchy stubborn hore was takin away to the principles office.

I guess that the people I sit with truly are my best friends.

And yeah, I know I put all the like a story. For some reason, that's how I like to explain things when I write. Don't ask why.

=^^= Nya

Ham and Cheese
03-01-2007, 07:45 PM
Thanks KB. I'll put what you and everyone else told me away in the fileing cabinet in my noggin.

Also, there was a major event today during lunch that really showed me how much my friends actually care about me.

There is this girl at our school named Destiny. But I (and a bunch of other people) know her as a ****, hore, skank, and a *****. Well, today I was heading to my table and as usuall, my eyes were glued to my drawing book. I was able to see if there were people in front of me so I wouldn't bump into them but, somehow mrs. slutty skanky bitchy hore got passed my line of site and tripped me into a chair. I hit it pretty hard and fell to the floor. My art book fell out of my hands and well....I had lose papers in them so yeah, it was like giant pieces of conffetti day. Even the chair was knocked over.

My friends saw the hole thing and they got up, walked up to Destiny, blocking her from getting to me. Aparently she was aiming to beat me up becasue she's a sluty skanky bitchy hore. -.-

Well anywyas, my friends to her to f*** off and leave me alone. Due to her being a slutty skanky bitchy hore, oh and stubborn too, she refused. Then Tiffany got a proctor and Mrs. SLuty skanky bitchy stubborn hore was takin away to the principles office.

I guess that the people I sit with truly are my best friends.

And yeah, I know I put all the like a story. For some reason, that's how I like to explain things when I write. Don't ask why.

=^^= Nya
^^Ah, that's good to hear, RM.

I'm very jealous, too. I have a singular best friend--Zach. He has a TON of other friends who always get jealous when I'm around him. Yet he manages to ignore it and makes time for them and not me. It's a never ending vortex of envy.

So I understand where you're coming from.

Neo Emolga
03-01-2007, 07:53 PM
Ouch... sorry to hear that happened...

However, if your friends stood up for you like that, they're definitely your friends. They do care about you after all.

Hopefully Destiny gets what's coming to her. She sounds like a real maggot.

RocketMeowth
03-01-2007, 08:34 PM
Ouch... sorry to hear that happened...

However, if your friends stood up for you like that, they're definitely your friends. They do care about you after all.

Hopefully Destiny gets what's coming to her. She sounds like a real maggot.

Destiny is queen maggot. SO yeah, I hope she gets her not deserts and a heaping truck full of tar.

Hoshika
03-01-2007, 08:59 PM
Nya.

I have a good amount of friends. They all loved my art and they all liked being around me. But after I introduced my best friend whom I've known since fourth grade, to Tiffany (a nineth grader who I befriended back when I was in nineth grade), all my friendships have begun sprialling down in a vortex of missery.

I never even knew that I could become as jelous as I am right now. Tiffany makes friends so easilly. She befirended all of my friends in less then a month when it took me six years to befriend them all. Also, all of my friends run to her to greet her and ignore me when I'm standing right there. Like I don't even exist. And now, they go all out for her art and say virtually **** about mine. It's like I'm being replaced by the one person I introduced to them all.

Miranda is the only one who has satyed a true friend to me. But I feel that even she, who I feel is like a sister to me, is slowly slipping away.

At lunch, Tiffany always brings out her sketchbook (we sit at a circular table by the way). I sit virtually right next to her and Miranda and Ashley (another friend) sit across from me and Tiffany. Anywyas, Tiffany always shows them her sketches as does Ashely (another artist) but, they never show me. They don't even ask if I want to see them.

I jsut feel like I am being forgotten about. The only way I can gt them to look at my art is if I hold it up and say, "Hey (place name here) look at this!" is a semi loud tone.

I'm jsut really scared that I'm actually losing all of my friends and again returning to that dark void where the only voices I hear are those who mach me.

=;_;= Nya

It's happened to me a lot, and I'm only in middle school.

I had a lot of friends way back in elementary school(my school is both). I was envyed by everyone/idoled by everyone. I was smartest and whenever I went around people, they would smile.

Then it went down, just like you.

They really started to hate me. Theyt wanted me dead because I was smart. There was a group as large as a class spreading rumors about me and even telling small children to hurt me and think I'm evil. Now I only have one friend and she too is slipping away from me.

You might be entering the void of lonliness, but I'm falling into the pit of hatred, despair, and bloody injuries. ;_;

So I understand. ._. (At least you aren't hated....)

Pooka
03-01-2007, 09:09 PM
Wow I must be lucky, I've had a great childhood so far (touch wood) so unfortunatley I can't really comment from experiences but it sounds like your story now has a better end to it.:wink:

Woodchuck
03-01-2007, 09:18 PM
My heart goes out to all of you guys (and girls). I'm fortunate enough to go to a private christian school. Most of the people there are really nice, so I don't have problems like teasing, getting beat-up, etc. If I do have a problem with someone, I just talk to them about it. I know that can be very hard for some people though, a lot of people actually. But then again, if people get mad at you when you are trying to settle a problem you have with them, can you say they were a true friend? Anyway, I know confrontation can be tough, but if you're calm and polite with the person you have a problem with, things usually work out for the better. It feels better (to me at least) to get problems out in the open than to sit and be miserable about it. If you feel like you absolutely can't confront the person, write them a note, or an e-mail or something. I guess the most important thing is that you find what works for you. I'll remember to pray for all of you that have problems at school, or anywhere else for that matter.

Charbok
03-01-2007, 09:39 PM
Easy for you to say. You weren't the most made fun kid in your entire school for six years running now were you?

My social skills are at 1
My self confidence level is getting lower by the minute from added pressure and from the small amount of maching that still goes on

I'm in a state of utter denial. And don't tell me to talk to a psychiatrist. I already did that when I nearly went insane back in tenth grade.

And I'm serious about that insane part.

thats true, i wasnt made fun of for six years running, it was closer to eight. i was always thought of as the nerd, and as a wimp. Countless times i was pushed and punched and i wouldnt fight back, so they called me a wimp, once i even got a big fat geometry book thrown at my head, and that hurt. So trust me when i say i know how it feels. What did i do? Well, the few friends i had were all dorks too, so i didnt have much luck there, but i slowly developed a comedic side and used that against them, as opposed to violence. If they called me a name, or pushed me, i always had something witty to say to them like "You know, phychiatrists say that aggresiveness is actually a sign of anti-intelligence" then they stopped.

Hoshika
03-01-2007, 09:41 PM
EDIT: Oh, so somebody DID hurt you... *sobs*

At least you have somebody with the courage to back you up. I have... nobody....

Meno
03-02-2007, 06:28 AM
From an external perspective, this is so explainable, it's scary. To me, it sounds like your self-esteem is... well... not good. I'm sorry to be so rough on you >_<, but it's true. But, your friends seem to provide you with grand comfort, especially in their praise of your talents. So, of course it hurts when you bring together members of your important support group only to find it collapsing before you. But, the "recent" incident showed much you mean to your friends, and mainly that you should believe more intheir love towards you no matter the circumstance. Simply because they have found another person of interest other than yourself, it does not mean that they have abandoned you. From what I have heard, you are an important person to them, one that they feel they can trust to not lose faith in them when they digress their attention to someone else (which is exactly what they did).

Recently, in my Psychology book, I read about a social emotion that is widely accepted in Japan called "Amae," being the feeling of being loved and cared for UNCONDITIONALLY by someone else. I believe that this connection is very real between you and your friends, and they will care for you no matter what happens. Give yourself a little credit: you're a great, talented person who is easy to enjoy, yearns for friendships, and values her friends very much. In your own words, you said that it took six years to form your current friendships, while it took the other girl only a few weeks. Do you honestly think that a bond made so easily can break one formed with so much effort?

And, to give a personal example (which I love to do oh so much ^^), my best friend, by far, took me four years to make. When we met, he seemed arrogant, but a different friend of mine who got us to meet up kept insisting on us hanging out together. Eventually, I saw Carl as an arrogant prick, and at one point during a summer vacation he pissed me off so much that I screamed at him, and ran out of his house, not to see him for almost two years... Eventually, we started talking again, but we still resented each-other greatly. Then, in two summers from the previously mentioned, all my other friends went on vacation, and me and Carl were the only two left. We started meeting more and more, and, by the time my friends came backwe were really close friends.

So, you see, it does not matter how long a friendship took to form, nor how good or bad are you at making friends (I was terrible up until high school, by wich time all my real friends were already made). They are YOUR FRIENDS, nothing less, so believe in them no matter what happens :wink:.

earth_type_rule
03-02-2007, 06:58 AM
Well, I never had this with my friends, though. But seriously, either that tiffany girl has made a major gossip on you, or she is just a b!@#&Ķ that tries to steal your friends away.

Solution: well, since Miranda is still sort of a friend to you, I sugest talking to her, and find out what Tiffany is doing or maybe what did you do wrong. If Tiffany did something wrong, than I suggest taking her back with a gossip.

Well, There should be a better solution, since mine wouldn't be 100% trustable of succeeding. But Talking to your only friend left would be a good idea. Find out what happened, and fix it.

RouteMaster
03-02-2007, 04:53 PM
I don't normally respond to these personal thingies because I don't really know what I can contribute, but in your case RM I might be able to help because a couple of years back I went through the same thing of losing my friends.

I ended up alone, upset and vunerable. I was left out of activities, constantly teased and poked and picked on when I played sports or joined in in other activities. But it gave me a chance to take a look at those around me and to take a look at myself and I made new friends who liked me for who I was, not what I could do. Now I'm happy and content and find it hard to remember exactly what it was like back then.

Basicially RM what I learned was that if people don't like you for who you are, then they're not worth your time. It's hard to recognise sometimes that people you trusted so closely can leave you behind in favour of someone else who they think better fills the gap in the group that was you. It's hurtful and you feel as if the whole world you knew has just been horribly changed.

So, RM, you are your own person. You're strong and you'll overcome this. If these people don't like you for who you are then, quite frankly, that's their loss. Good luck and I hope it all works out.