View Full Version : A Cacturne of Events.
Syas' eyes widened as his cherished Meditite fainted, no match for the
Shuppet sent out by Dalton. Recalling his pokemon to it's ball, Syas knew he
should be thinking of what to do next... instead however, he couldn't help
thinking about the events that had led him here...
Syas had started the day like any other, waking to the morning sun as it
beamed down through the trees at him. Smiling up at the morning sky, Syas
yawned stiffly before getting to his feet. Removing a small metal ball from his
pocket, Syas let it fall to the ground where it opened with a hiss.
"Take as much time as you need.. I am going to scrounge up some food." he
said cheerfully as a small form took shape from the energy escaping the ball.
"Med!" it replied as it hovered in the air above the pokeball, starting the
morning meditation that had become a part of it's training routine.
Sighing contently as he wandered off, Syas made an effort to stay close to
the campsite from the previous night, just in case his Pokemon required
anything. Kneeling down amongst some bushes, Syas began scrounging for
berries, as the morning birds chirped in the trees.
Lost in thought for a moment, Syas' attention was ripped back to the real
world as he heard a high pitched scream from the north.
"PiiiiiiiiiikkkkkkkAAAAAAAA!" the voice yelled, filled with pain.
Forgeting his Meditite for the time, Syas ran forward, trying to reach the
source of the voice. Wondering whether or not it was a good idea to go
alone, Syas blurred past bushes and trees, collecting scrapes and cuts along
Arriving on the scene, Syas was horrified at the sight that befell his eyes.
Looking around the small clearing, he found no other living thing besides
himself... what terrified him was the non-living thing he found.
In the middle of the field, lay a Pikachu, deep wounds eminent on it's small
yellow body. Running to it, Syas stumbled a bit as he fell to his knees next
to it. Scooping up it's lifeless form in his arms, Syas began running back to
his campsite. It'll be okay... all I have to do is find a PokeCenter... they can
fix it... he repeated to himself over and over again.
Bolting through his campsite, Syas deftly grabbed the pokeball at Meditite's
feet and recalled it, never breaking his run. Making his way out of the
woods, Syas focused on simply not tripping as he jumped out onto the road,
scaring a few kids in the process. Running along the road, Syas tried to keep
his mind off the lifeless Pokemon in his arms.
After running for a solid ninety minutes, Syas saw signs of a town
ahead. "Rustboro" a nearby sign declared.
Let's hope they have a PokeCenter, Syas frantically thought to himself as he
rushed into town, heading toward the red-roofed building. Nearly knocking
the door off the hinges as he burst inside, Syas shoved people aside in his
mad dash for the counter.
"Please!" he pleaded to the Nurse, "You have to help him! I found him like
this in the woods."
Yelling for some assistance, the Nurse took the body of the Pikachu and
rushed into the back room. Leaving Syas only one option... to wait.
Sitting in the chair and drumming his fingers, Syas looked over at Meditite
next to him. Meeting his gaze, the Pokemon just stared into Syas' eyes.
Syas knew from past occasions that not only was Meditite capable, but
rather adept at reading his mind.
"Med..." it said softly, as if to agree with Syas' thoughts.
About to reply, Syas jumped to his feet as the door opened and the nurse
who he had handed the Pikachu to walked out.
"We're... sorry... there was nothing we could do." she said softly, her cheeks
obviously stained with tears.
Nodding softly at the nurse, Syas looked back to Meditite. It didn't take a
Psychic Pokemon to know what Syas was thinking... whoever did this was
going to pay. Looking back to the nurse, Syas smiled sadly and nodded
again, "I know you did everything you could Nurse..." he said, probing for her
"Jennifer" she said softly, eyes downcast.
"....I'll get them" said Syas softly as he walked to the door, Meditite at his
Yawning as he stepped out of the PokeCenter, Syas was suprised to see that
dusk had just fallen. Checking to make sure he had everything, Syas,
clothed in his typical cargo pants and t-shirt, headed off into the darkness,
desperate to find that spot again... there had to be a clue there.
Arriving at the scene where he had found that poor Pikachu, Syas looked to
the sky as he stood in the clearing. Who would do such a thing? Battling
wasn't about killing, it was supposed to be about the relationship between
the Pokemon and it's trainer. Had the Pikachu been attacked by a Wild
Pokemon? Or had a Trainer not called it back in time... or.. had a Trainer...
instructed it to kill? There were alot of questions in Syas' mind, but they all
seem to dissapear as he heard a twig snap behind him.
Whipping around, Syas was startled to see Dalton, the boy he had grew up
with facing him. Syas and Dalton had been the best of friends as kids, they
had even gotten their first Pokemon on the same day. Syas caught his
Meditite and used it to help Dalton catch a Zigzagoon.
"Dalton... what are you doing here?" Syas asked as he walked forward slowly.
"Lin! Lin!" a whisper cried from the darkness as a shadowy form flew toward
Syas, attempting to Tackle him.
Jumping to the side, Syas narrowly avoided his attacker... a Linoone.
Looking up at Dalton, Syas saw that this man was not the boy he had grown
"It's funny that we should meet again Syas" Dalton began, "After so long, we
meet again... here... now. You're more pathetic than I remember. Has your
Meditite even evolved yet? I doubt it... you were always too caring of that
thing to really be a trainer."
"Dal...Dalton... don't say things like that... we're friends... we.. we go back.."
Syas said softly, feigning to be struck in awe as his hand moved toward
Meditite's pokeball ever so slowly.
"My luck has finally started showing up Syas. All those years, I couldn't beat
you... I couldn't even come close. My Zigzagoon was no match for your
stupid little Fighting-Onion... and you knew it. That's why you helped me
catch it.. so that you would win... you ALWAYS WON!" Dalton finished, his
anger showing in his voice.
"No.. no..! You wanted a Zigzagoon... you told me specifically....!" Syas
countered, wondering if any part of his friend remained in the man he now
"ENOUGH! Linoone! Quick Attack! TAKE HIM DOWN!" Dalton screamed.
Thankful that he had moved his hand closer already, Syas grabbed the
Pokeball and threw it toward the Linoone. "Meditite! go!"
Those words, however short and simple seemed to hold sway over the once
Zigzagoon. Stopping in it's tracks, it's eyes watched as Syas' Meditite
escaped the ball, taking a defensive stance infront of it's trainer.
"Linoone! Quick Attack that Meditite NOW!" Dalton yelled.
Syas watched as the Linoone started running at his Meditite, it's speed
making it almost invisible as it moved. Hearing a dull *THUD*, Syas looked at
the battle with a sparkle in his eye. Meditite has stopped Linoone's
attack with a simple block, taking little if any damage.
"Meditite! Give him a Hi Jump Kick!" Syas called, watching as Meditite leapt
from the ground, soaring toward the deflected Linoone and landing a kick
square to it's jaw. Syas watched as the Linoone's eye got big and then
close as he fainted.
"Good work Meditite!" Syas cheered.
Red with anger, Dalton grabbed a Pokeball from the shoulder bag he wore,
throwing it into the fight. "Let's see how you handle my... 'prize'... Go!
"Alright Meditite, Shuppet's a Ghost type, so watch out for a Night Shade or
Shadow Ball attack, try to dodge it and counter with Confusion." Syas
coached his Pokemon before sending it to meet Dalton's Shuppet in battle.
"Shuppet!" Dalton cried, "Use Shadow..."
Syas smiled, as soon as the word 'Shadow' left Dalton's lips Meditite got
ready to dodge the Shadow Ball.
"...Rush!" Dalton finished.
"Shadow Rush?" Syas asked outloud, an echoing "Med?" following it.
Watching the Shuppet, Syas blinked, and for a moment, saw a dark cloud of
energy surrounding the Shuppet before it rushed forward.
"Meditite! Watch out! It's a contact attack!" Syas yelled in vain. Eyes
widening as his Meditite fainted after only one hit.
Shaking his head to clear his thoughts, Syas brought himself back to reality,
squared off against Dalton and his Shuppet.
"Alright Shuppet... time to take Syas out for good.. he humilated me, and as
your master, I command you to end his life."
Gulping, Syas looked around for something... anything to protect him from
the Ghost, but could find nothing suitable.
"Shuppet! Shadow Rush Syas NOW!" Dalton commanded.
Closing his eyes, Syas accepted his fate, hoping that Dalton would forget
about his Meditite be content with Syas' destruction. Feeling the wind
preceeeding Shuppet's attack hit his face, Syas knew his life was over.
"CAC!" two voices yelled, off to either side of Syas, pulling him from his dark
Opening his eyes, Syas saw two Cacturne, standing in front of him to
prevent Shuppet's attack.
"More friends ready to die Syas?" Dalton asked, unaware that they were not
Watching the fight, his eyes glazed over, it was apparent that the Cacturnes
would lose without some guidance. One was already badly hurt from a
Shadow Rush attack, and was having trouble standing.
"Cacturnes! Needle Arm!" Syas called, hoping they would obey. Watching
them both raise their right arms as the Shuppet rushed in, Syas saw an
innumerate amount of quills shoot from their arms into the Shuppet as he
rammed into the healthy Cacturne and dissapeared.
"Wh.. where did he go?" Syas asked softly as Dalton began laughing.
"He's a Ghost Pokemon Syas. He can pass through anything. Right now he is
using his Shadow Ball directly on the Heart of that Cacturne!" Dalton said
Watching in horror, Syas saw the Cacturne fall to it's knees, and then to the
ground entirely... dead. Gritting his teeth as the Shuppet reappeared, Syas
looked to the wounded Cacturne.
"We need to knock that Shuppet out.. Cacturne, use Needle Arm one more
time." Syas said, quiet and deadly calm.
"CACTURNE!" the Cacturne screamed as it let loose with everything it had.
Syas watched callously as the needles flew toward Shuppet and Dalton. As
Shuppet fainted from the attack, Dalton picked up the pokeballs of his
beaten team and looked angrily at Syas.
"Another time Syas... for now.. I am going to leave. I wouldn't think about
following me either... your friend looks like it won't last the night.." Dalton
sneered as he ran away, unaware that one of the needles had severed the
strap on his shoulder bag and caused it to fall to the ground.
Turning to the Cacturne, Syas saw that Dalton was right, it's wounds were
severe. "I.. I'm sorry... about... all of this... thank you... so much.." he said
softly to the Cacturne, trying to hold back tears knowing that two Pokemon
had given their lives to defend him. "I... I wish there was a way I could
pay you back..." he finished, head hung low.
"Ca..cac.." the Cacturne said weakly, pointing toward a small group of
bushes. Walking over slowly, Syas parted the bushes to find a small Egg.
Turning slowly to look back at the Cacturne, Syas choked a bit, seeing that
it too had now passed away.
Bringing his attention back to the Egg, Syas heard a cracking sound as the
shell began to break open, a Cacnea taking it's first steps into the world.
So this is what it wanted? Me to take care of it's offspring? Syas thought to
himself as the Cacnea looked around, wondering who and where it's parents
Nodding to himself, Syas ran back to Dalton's bag and rummaged through a
bit before finding five pokeballs. Picking one up, he looked back to the Cacnea.
"There's been enough fighting tonight... Please just come peacefully..." he
said softly as he threw the ball toward the Cacnea and watched it draw the
Pokemon into it's confines.
((Those 5 Pokeballs Syas just found are not "Free" it is just how he found the 5 that every new player to URPG gets))
03-15-2005, 01:52 PM
Story (Details, Length, Plot):
Well, I liked the story line since it was just a beginning of an adventure yet it could have been more interesting by giving more details about your character in the first post (After the prologue which was the end of your battle against Dalton). And about details, I felt what was going on, and I liked how you described things but more the better as Graders says here. The length could have been improved with more details and descriptions Syas but not bad for a Cactnea.
Battle (Details, Length):
The battle was not bad, but it needed much more details and couple of extra moves to lengthen it up. Not bad though...
Can happen I guess...
Structure (Grammer, Spelling):
I noticed some here and there but typical typos though and none is perfect... :wink: (No time for me to double check, sorry)
OUTCOME- Well...Cacnea is captured in a short lengthed story...have fun ^^
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