I'm back! I really couldn't give up on this despite almost no one reading it, because I have HUGE plans xD
Here's chapter 13, the battle for Devon Goods...
Chapter 13: Shupster
That cave was of the thickest mist, of the darkest void, a representation of complete blindness set before my eyes. Okay, that was a bit exaggerated, but it was seriously hard to see anything in there. My first thought was wondering why Team Aqua would set their base into such a sight-defying background, but my next one was, heck with that. Anyway, their base are belong to us soon.
Cassidy kicked something hard, and by the sound of it, it must have been another box. I had no time of finding out, as Cassidy immediately dropped it inside May’s bag. I know I shouldn’t call it May’s bag anymore because we have it, but I stole it for them, so I DO WHAT I WAUNT.
Either the guy was lying, or my 1.2 eyesight was failing me – there was no Aqua grunt in sight. I didn’t mind – I preferred to get my eyes to actually see something before owning someone in battle. But to be honest, I really haven’t battled much – my first battle happened on this travesty of a journey. I know his intentions for me were far from a battle Pokemon intended to bring him the League Champion title, far, far from that…
Who am I thinking of? It makes no sense… Knowing someone’s intentions, but not knowing who that someone is specifically... I always knew I had a screwed-up mind. And that no doubt owed its existence from him, again, him, who I had no idea was.
Why were these memories spouting out again? I put them all behind, for sure. Maybe it was something about this cave that triggered negative thoughts? I never had time to figure it out, as a strangled shout of “You!” rang out, my vision had already cleared and made way for a guy in a blue bandanna staring at us in disbelief.
Butch responded first. “Yeah, us. Hand over the Goods,” he said. I sort of admire how much he’d developed in the intelligence sense since the journey, but I must say that he needs to work more on witty comments. Cassidy obviously thought that response was incredibly stupid, by the way she punched Butch out of the way.
“So, Aqua grunt, we meet again,” she said instead. “How come it’s always you on scrap jobs?”
The grunt was undaunted. “Those with greater potential are often placed on the bottom of the work list because Boss worries that suckers might lose their self esteem and in turn, a Pokemon battle,” he replied, almost cautiously.
I knew we wanted the goods, and it would be best if we avoided any trouble of large scale. However, “Your boss’s either stupid,” I heard myself saying. “or a crackhead.” And the weird thing was, I couldn’t stop. “Or maybe he made this decision while selecting one his twenty concubines in which at least a quarter would be from his own team,” I continued to insult. And right after I felt two hard hands close in fury around my neck, I thought in panic, what is wrong with me!?
“You know, belonging to a Team yourself you should at least have some idea of the utterly high respect to the Boss,” the grunt was saying. Now feeling this unfamiliar inner self get ready for another wisecrack, I struggled to stop it, as well as to inhale some oxygen. As the latter was quickly deprived from me I heard good old Butch try and help me out.
“Only cowards try and weaken their opponent’s Pokemon by attacking it themselves,” he said. And then I was like, what the f***? How is THAT going to help me but I soon realized that it was because the grunt was paying attention to that guy with the green hair saying retarded stuff and he was loosening his grip on my neck and I COULD BREATHE. I could breathe?
“Give me that book,” demanded the grunt. “That is not written in the Pokemon Battling Almanac 2007.”
“Yes it is,” shouted Butch as he hurled a Playboy into the grunt’s face. Picking it up, the grunt dropped me completely as I took my first complete breath in about 30 seconds. He scanned the torn magazine as I scanned him. “What the? This isn’t the Battling- ah. Aw yeah,” he started murmuring as he flipped the page. “Uh huh. Yeahhhhhhh.” This continued, and only after one of his hands slipped suspiciously into his pockets did I see a perfect chance to start a battle, the only way out which of course I didn’t want but hadn’t avoided. As I gathered up my replenished energy and pitched a Shadow Ball attack at the grunt, I couldn’t help but think Butch was pretty smart – I mean, a guy’s greatest weakness IS, a lot of the time, his sex drive.
When I looked up, my well-aimed Shadow Ball had smacked the Playboy to the floor of the cave, where a stalagmite had been waiting patiently to jab right through the spine of the magazine and tear it up even more. The grunt was also floored from the impact (unfortunately my Shadow Ball wasn’t powerful enough to propel him onto a stalagmite), fumbling for a Pokeball on his belt. When he at last had a firm hold of one, I noticed an abnormally tall green Pokemon already standing beside me, looking ready to fight. It took me a while to notice that it was the evolved form of Treecko.
Standing up from what looked like chronic arthritis, the grunt flung his Pokeball onto the cave floor. “You guys wanna battle, eh?” he said, forcing a smirk. He then backed away as a miniature but evil-looking fish patched with orange-and-blue crusts appeared in a flash of blue light. I heard Cassidy’s Pokedex describe the Pokemon in a clear, monotone voice that reverberated through the cave.
“Carvanha. Water/Dark. Savage Pokemon. If anything invades Carvanha's territory, it will swarm and tear at the intruder with its pointed fangs. On its own, however, this Pokémon turns suddenly timid.”
“That certainly explains the matter,” said Grovyle to me. “I was pondering on wherefore a Dark type Pokemon may appear so cowardly.”
“Cut down on the superfluous grandiloquence, mister,” I spat back. “Do something. Britney Spears commands you.”
“Carvahna, use Rage at the Grovyle!” yelled the grunt.
Carvanha, on the command, started glinting and it hurled itself at Grovyle, biting and lashing its tail at the lizard’s face ferociously, almost as if it was having a seizure. I floated up from the ground to avoid the fangs, because I didn’t need to help Grovyle – his amazing defense kept his stamina strong and green. “Grovyle, use Purs – ” I heard Butch say behind me.
“GYAHH, NO!” I yelled in panic, cutting the command short. “No Pursuit! Pursuit bad, Tree- I mean Grovyle! Pursuit suck! LEAF BLADE! DO LEAF BLADE!”
Who wouldn’t listen to such a demented command? Grovyle turned, nodded, and tilted his mouth in what seemed to be an “Okayyyyy….?” smile. Then he turned back to the battle scene with sharp blades of foliage spread out on his forearms. The razor-edge leaves whizzed through the damp cave air and cut through the disgusting fishy-thingy’s rough, cracked scales as Grovyle deftly flicked them out, one by one, like ninja shurikens. Carvanha cried out in extreme pain and its stamina seemed to be pretty lowered.
“Nice one,” I encouraged. Then Carvanha glinted again in preparation for another Rage attack, and hurled itself at the empty space that Grovyle had been standing on two seconds before. Appearing from behind it, Grovyle slashed Carvanha with a sharp claw in what looked like a Fury Cutter, only weaker. Grovyle looked pretty tired from what I saw, as Carvanha sunk pointed fangs into his arm with a fierce Bite attack.
“Holding on?” I asked Grovyle in the midst of slashing, Carvanha groaning, and trainer commands.
“Considerably,” Grovyle panted back, finally KOing Carvanha with a Leaf Blade.
Cassidy sent out Taillow for some practice on the next Pokemon, a Poochyena. Because of emo old Taillow’s low level it teetered near a faint, but it managed.
Battle having ended, I looked behind the defeated grunt and saw a timid-looking, shivering Wingull pressed up in the corner of the room. Its wings were bruised and folded up in skewed angles. I remembered vaguely about the old man asking for his Peeko, so I figured Peeko must be this Wingull. I signaled to Cassidy.
“Later, Shupster,” she said. “Gotta punish this kid.” She strode over to the grunt and now signaling to Butch, threw the grunt against the wall. Butch, right on cue, walked over, and with a force completely unlike his usual stupid attitude, ripped the grunt’s pants right off. Both previous Rocket members walked back to where I was floating, leaving the guy in his boxers. Cassidy skillfully flipped the trousers on her hands upside-down, and the legendary Devon Goods scattered onto the cave floor with a KLATTER that couldn’t have sounded more kickass. Silence ensued, but it was like an old glorious dream revived when Butch finally spoke again…
Prepare for trouble and make it double!
To infect the world with devastation
To blight all peoples in every nation
To denounce the goodness of truth and love
To extend our wrath to the stars above
We're Team Rocket, circling earth all day and night!
Surrender to us now, cause you’ve lost the fight!
That was Raticate’s cue, right? Now he’s gone. So who else’s could it be but MINE!?
“Gyahahaha! That’s RIGHT!”
And the old man behind us exploded into cheers.