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Go Back   Pokemon Forum - Pokemon Elite 2000 » Interactive Boards » Creative Writing

Creative Writing Share your fan fiction, stories, poems, essays, editorials, song lyrics, or any other related written work. All written must be your creation. Start a new thread, and keep replying to that thread as you add on more chapters. Anyone can join in at anytime.


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  #1  
Old 10-31-2008, 10:11 AM
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Default jenna"s kanto adventure!

Can someone please lock this! Im bad at grammer but i have great ideas so im gonna hit the road and move on to comic makeing!
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Last edited by Pokemon Ultimatum; 11-26-2008 at 11:40 AM. Reason: writing pokemon story sure is hard im better at other stuff i just love pokemon!
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  #2  
Old 10-31-2008, 11:23 AM
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Default Re: jenna"s kanto adventure!

Um, this needs to be much longer.
A lot of the chaptered fics here are about three MSWord pages long in length, and it's generally a good idea to make them to that standard so the thread won't get closed by a Mod.
And the entire "trainer gets his/her first Pokemon and goes on a journey to collect badges" scenario has been really overused, so unless the plot is something no one is going to expect at all, I'd reccommend trying a different type of genre.
Plain and simple, that idea's been dried up from a deep well to a measly puddle, xD

Something that helps is to type out chapters on Word so you can save and go back to them later; it's about the only way I can manage my own fic to begin with.
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  #3  
Old 10-31-2008, 08:37 PM
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Default Re: jenna"s kanto adventure!

so just change the size of the type and u should be fine.
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  #4  
Old 11-01-2008, 01:20 AM
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Default Re: jenna"s kanto adventure!

Quote:
Originally Posted by ROGUE ARCEUS View Post
so just change the size of the type and u should be fine.
O_o

No, you won't.

People will still say it's short, which it is.

I lost interest after the first sentence. Not good.

I'll take four lines from your fic, and put my replies in italics and bold.

Quote:
Once in a place called pallet town lived a girl Jenna. Bore. Bye.

Today was a special day it was the day jenna would get her first pokemon! I don't want to read the rest of this...

And this is how her adventure begins! 'This'? 'This' is her adventure? WOW! I DIDN'T REALIZE THAT!

hold on to your hats cause here we go! What hat? You're speaking as the author again - bad girl.

Jenna! wake up!said jenna's mother. Shouldn't there be quotes around speech...?

you know what today is dont you? No, sorry. I don't.

yahh! its the day i"ll get my first pokemon! HEY! YOU USED A QUOTE! I'M SO PROUD OF YOU! (Too bad it's in the wrong place, with no ending quote...) I should care why? And who's getting their first Pokémon? Zeus?

so get up! so jenna got ready and in a few minutes she said goodbye and left for porfeser oaks lab for her first pokemon! Didn't see that one coming.

okay here i am! Too many tense switches. Bad, bad, bad. Quotes, as well.

porfeser oak im hear to get my first pokemon! Who is saying this? Icarus? Typhon? Arceus forbid... Ash? Also, what do I hear?

hey were is he? Who said that? Or, thought that? I'm confused!

oh! said one of oaks employes you most be looking for porfeser oak! Where are the quotes? I see none.

yes im here to get my first pokemon! Who is again?

im afraid hes gone for some feild work youll have to come someother time. How many misspellings were in this sentence alone? Also, where are the quotes?

okay bye! stupid employe What's an 'employe'?

he could of told me were
This girl should not be a telepath. If she is, scrap her.
What's with the misspellings?
Why is this a painful block of text?
Why do you keep trying to make these fics when everyone wants you to learn proper Spelling and Grammar (capitalized on purpose) first?
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Last edited by Giratina; 11-01-2008 at 01:23 AM.
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  #5  
Old 11-02-2008, 11:42 AM
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Default Re: jenna"s kanto adventure!

p
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Last edited by Pokemon Ultimatum; 11-04-2008 at 11:11 AM.
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  #6  
Old 11-02-2008, 12:29 PM
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Default Re: jenna"s kanto adventure!

Quote:
Originally Posted by jennaxlucario View Post
um yahh what ever! How old do you think i am. my school wasnt good enough and i didnt go to super good schools i went to schools with small classrooms so could pay attention better because paying attentoin is really hard i have some kinda problem... and i never really got to that stuff im not that great with grammer and stuff but i do have faith! and can u stop insulting me i didnt have enough time to go back and check it im busy whith my own life u know! so please stop.. no insults please from everyone who checks this just tell me if i spelled something wrong or a coment.
... He wasn't insulting you, you know.
I've seen much worse, and the reply you gave to him was rather... rude, to say it lightly.
Neither of us are trying to insult anyone, but if we take the time to give this much constructive criticism, then that means we'd like to see improvements and know that you can do much better than you are now.
Trust me, I've seen quite a few threads get closed thanks to these types of flame wars, and none of the people involved win when a thread is closed.

Either way, you may have to learn to take both types of criticism, because some people may not know how to express it any other way. If people comment to begin with, they're interested, so try to take their opinions into account. Your Fanfic will - more often than not - become a better read thanks to it.
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  #7  
Old 11-02-2008, 02:14 PM
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Default Re: jenna"s kanto adventure!

Quote:
Originally Posted by jennaxlucario View Post
um yahh what ever! How old do you think i am. I think you're young enough to use your age as an excuse, but not old enough to realize that I'm probably at least a year younger than you. (I'm eleven, just for the record.)

my school wasnt good enough and i didnt go to super good schools i went to schools with small classrooms so could pay attention better because paying attentoin is really hard i have some kinda problem... I go to schools with small classrooms as well. (I have trouble paying attention too, mind you.)

and i never really got to that stuff im not that great with grammer and stuff but i do have faith! How old are you to not get to grammar and spelling...? I'm not completely sure what "faith" means, but I'm going to assume it's something along the lines of "I want to feel special!" or "I think I can do this, but I'm not sure. Besides, I always have excuses!"

and can u stop insulting me i didnt have enough time to go back and check it im busy whith my own life u know! I have my own life too. Tip: proofread, proofread, proofread. Set aside some downtime for your fanfic. If you're doing it just to be cool, don't.

so please stop.. no insults please from everyone who checks this just tell me if i spelled something wrong or a coment. This is more than spelling something wrong. It's a serious no-no. Please, before you try again, spend time thinking over your fanfic and polishing it to a finish. Separate your sentences and paragraphs, do all the things you can to make it as professional as a Pokémon fanfic can get before publishing it and sending it off to Random House. Maybe then people will remember your fics for what they are, and not for how annoying you are.
Edited with comments.
__________________

"Wigglewigglewigglewigglewigglewigglewiggle."
~ World famous singing sensation, Stefan Gordy.

(For the longest time I was telling myself that I would come back to PE2K once I had something artsy and cool to contribute... but that's too much effort. GIRA IS BACK!)

(vpp da)
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