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Creative Writing Share your fan fiction, stories, poems, essays, editorials, song lyrics, or any other related written work. All written must be your creation. Start a new thread, and keep replying to that thread as you add on more chapters. Anyone can join in at anytime.


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  #16  
Old 11-28-2008, 01:40 AM
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Default Re: Fade [UPDATED 11/6]

October 4, 2009
1:34 PM


I had been walking for nearly an hour, and still I had no closure on the subject. The smiling man, the doctors who 'tried their best', my mom... My mom who I wished more than ever to be here with me, to answer the questions I held in my thoughts, or even just to hear her voice one more time. This time without pain, without sadness, without death. I knew that if I did, it would simply make things worse, but I wanted to. I wanted to so badly, but I couldn't. For whatever reason I couldn't even muster up a single memory of her other than the simple phrase she uttered to me before her death.

"I am so proud of you."

Not a smile, not a frown, not a single expression could be conjured up by my mind. All I saw when I thought of her were her final moments. That goodbye she gave me so many days ago, though it seemed like mere hours, echoed in my memory every time I thought of her.

My feet dragged on as I looked down at them, but when I looked away from them I seemed to be moving very fast, or rather, that the whole world was moving very fast and I was standing still. I saw the people around me, but as soon as I took a look at their faces they seemed to be long off into the distance, mere memories. Cars went by in fractions of a second, and bikers seemed to fly by at unimaginable speeds. It was all so chaotic, and yet, when I looked at myself, everything seemed to oblong and slow. As if I was standing in a flowing stream, watching all the fish swim sleekly upstream and then looking at myself moving so slowly and awkwardly against the current.

The people swam by like the fish, passing me without so much as a glance in my direction or a nod at me. They had their goal, they knew where they were going. I did not.

I looked up for the first time in many miles, triggered by a sudden shadow overtaking my position. It seemed to hang over me like one of the clouds that you see in the cartoons. It followed them, it's sole purpose to haunt them and reveal the sheer misery behind their eyes. And though it should not have come as a surprise, all things considered, the cause of the shadow (when discovered) felt like a nail in my chest.

The hospital stood there, towering over me, covering up the sun like my own personal solar eclipse. It was funny how of all places I should end up, this would be the one, on this day, at this time. I did not believe in fate, or evil omens, but nobody could deny the sheer eeriness that the building presented at the present. People seemed to walk into the building cautiously, and when they came out they seemed relieved to finally be in the sun.

I slowly sank to my knees, giving up on ever escaping that which had taken place today. When I began to cry, I felt a slight tap on my shoulder, and I ignored it. When it repeated itself moments later, this time harder, I decided it'd be best to answer.

"Go." I said sternly, doing my best to hide my tears.

"Go!?" A female voice said, and she was angry, "You shove me out of the elevator today and you expect me to just leave without asking why?"

"Yea, that's the idea." I replied, and I spun the other way around.

"Alright that's...! That's..." Her voice quieted and softened as she realized exactly what was going on. "Are you..." She tried to ask, and I knew just what she meant to say.

"Okay?" I finished her sentence. "No." I said simply, "No I am not. Would you be okay if your mother, and your only friend in the world, died in your arms? Would you be okay if, at that funeral, the people who wrote the speech for you sabotaged it to make her into something she was not?" I took a quick breath, "Or if there was a man laughing as you cried, smiling as you frowned, and talking while you gave a speech about her?" I turned to face her, finally showing my tear-laden face to her, "No, I don't think you'd be... I don't think you'd be okay."

I didn't have to look at her to know what her expression read right now, and I knew what she was about to say.

"I'm..." She spoke softly, barely a whisper, and then was silent. I heard her moving closer to me, then sitting down on the curb next to me. A soft hand rested on my back, and moved back and forth in a comforting motion. I wanted to shrug it off, but... it felt nice. Such a stranger caring for me more than anyone in that church, with the possible exception of the pastor, was comforting.

As she did that, for however long she did, I felt the anguish recede, albeit slowly. Her hand seemed to flatten out the remaining distress over a larger area, which made it less concentrated and easier to handle, It was like trying to carry a heavy weight with one hand, versus using two hands. The weight was still the same, but it was easier to handle, and I felt myself straighten up.

"Thanks..." My voice faded, and I closed my eyes. "I'm Shaun."

"Aura" She replied.

"Aura..." I thought aloud, "It fits you very well." I looked up at her through tear laden (but drying) eyes, and she smiled and blushed.

"It's not that great." She said sheepishly, looking away. I couldn't help but smile a bit. She did carry an aura of beatitude with her, and it made things a little easier, at least for the moment.

"No, it is." I encouraged, and then caught a glimpse of something shining at her chest. Upon closer inspection, I saw that it was a necklace made of marble that seemed to be a perfect sphere. It was beautiful, with many colors of blue stone washing over one another, transitioning as easily as day to night, or from being awake to being asleep. Smooth and unnoticeable.

It complemented her face, which was also smooth and transitioned. I traced it with my eyes, taking note of her perfectly carved face and beautiful black hair that seemed to wave with the perfect amount of subtlety like a sea of elegance that can only be appreciated upon inspection. I followed her neck, which was beautifully tan and shaped, down to the beginning of her breasts. They were remarkable smooth as well, keeping perfect shape all the way around and were proportionately sized to perfection, though covered up by a black fitted tank top.

Her arms were also beautifully tanned, with a hint of smooth and thin hair going down them. It was obvious by her muscle tone that she was athletic, and I envied that. Her legs were also very well toned, and regardless of the black pants she wore, I could tell.

"You're beautiful!" I exclaimed in envy. Her eyes widened and she blushed to a color red that I had yet to see on the face of a human before. "No, really!" And I meant every word of it. She was beautiful, without a doubt. All of the sudden the looked off into the distance and a look of horror ran across her face. I followed her gaze across the area but saw nothing important.

"Wha--" I tried to speak, but she interrupted me.

"I have to go." She said, then stood up and began walking away. She turned her head around and smiled, "Nice to meet you!" She yelled.

"You too." I said, far too quiet for her to hear.
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  #17  
Old 11-28-2008, 01:40 AM
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Default Re: Fade [UPDATED 11/6]

October 4, 2009
2:05 PM


It had been but eight minutes since she walked away from me, and already the darkness creped up on me, waiting for me to let my guard down so it could let itself in. It was as if my leg was tied to the bottom of a lake by a chain, and though I had enough slack to move around and stay well above the dark water, I felt trapped within some very small walls. And all the while the water rose further and further... Eventually it would get to a point that I would not longer be able to stay afloat, and I would simply be inches away from the air when I drowned in it.

The water splashed away as a black car drove up to me and opened the side door. It was Pastor Jacob, and he motioned for me to get in. Since it was either that or go into the hospital, I decided to choose the better option.

"You left quite a few people in there very upset, Shaun." He scolded me, though very softly.

"Mission accomplished." I said sarcastically.

"You know that's not what I meant." He retaliated, "I meant... that you did do the right thing. At least, in your mothers' eyes you would have."

"And what about in yours?"

"I'd have to agree with your mother on this one." He looked behind us towards a few cars who were trying to cut us off. "Though the person who wrote the speech was a dear friend of mine."

"Past tense, Mr. Brown." I said, pointing out the obvious, "Who was he?"

"Jeremiah Hale." He recited with discomfort. "Man never knew your mother, and yet amidst the chaos he was the only one who offered to write the speech for you. I admire his act, and his intentions were pure, I assure you. I gave him all of the information I had on your mother, and he wrote a speech based on that." He looked at me for a moment, but my head was turned, facing out the window. "Don't blame this on him."

"Give him my true thanks." I remarked, again with sarcasm.

"Shaun, enough." He said, "This has to stop."

"As do you." I nodded towards an upcoming STOP sign and he looked just in time to slam on the brakes and miss getting smashed by a semi.

"God dammit, Shaun. You're not making this any easier for me." I could tell he was getting frustrated.

"Look Pastor, this isn't easy for me either. And for good reason." I turned away from him and watched my breath create fog on the window.

"I know, Shaun, believe me I know." He said, all of the sudden very somber.

There was a long pause just then, and it was uncomfortable. I shifted in my seat, trying to prompt him to say something, anything to break the silence. Of course, neither of us had anything to say. He was likely reminiscing on a past experience that this had reminded him of, and I was too busy trying to make him talk to talk myself.

Eventually, the car slowed and I wiped the window of my breath to see where we were.

"Of course..." We had arrived at my own house, the place that I had been living for the past few days. Every morning, a caretaker would come to see that I was up, and every night she would come again to make me dinner. Other than that, I was alone the entire time. "Another motif..." I said quietly to myself.

"Hmm?" Pastor Jacob asked.

"Nothing." I said, "Nothing at all." And I removed myself from the car, slammed the door, and trudged into my house.
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  #18  
Old 11-28-2008, 04:54 AM
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Default Re: Fade [UPDATED 11/27/2008]

It's pretty good, but what happened to those terrorists, and is Aura supposed to loo|< li|<e who I thin|< she is? Sorry, the |< button is bro|<en.
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  #19  
Old 11-28-2008, 05:22 AM
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Default Re: Fade [UPDATED 11/27/2008]

Quote:
Originally Posted by karmachameleon View Post
It's pretty good, but what happened to those terrorists, and is Aura supposed to loo|< li|<e who I thin|< she is? Sorry, the |< button is bro|<en.
Nah, Aura is completely made up.
And STEAM will return to play a very pivotal role in the plot. I just needed to play out the catalyst of his mother for a bit.
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  #20  
Old 12-09-2008, 10:32 PM
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Default Re: Fade [UPDATED 11/27/2008]

October 4, 2009
6:45 PM

Not having anyone to talk to about what you need to is bad. Having one person to talk to is worse. A week ago I would've thought that line of logic to be counterintuitive, but as I discovered on September 29, and again today, is that having a single person who agrees with you, or even a single person to talk to, is an instability. Where only having yourself offered a constant, never-ending hum of loneliness in the background, having a single person offered a roller coaster. A roller coaster, that, when high up, was great. The problem was when it came down, when you weren't with that person, it seemed like an inevitable detachment from your body that drove you near suicide. This is where I was ensconced now.

I had slept for the past four hours, and upon waking mere minutes earlier I had believed the entire situation to be a dream. Awakening in a sweat and breathing hastily, I tried to slow my lungs but they didn't respond. After a few minutes, I was able to convince my body (though my mind had already come to that conclusion) that there was nothing to panic about. My mother was fine, and I was no longer alone. The repercussion of that logic came when I walked downstairs and called my mother's name, asking her to make me a bowl of cereal for breakfast.
Now I sat in the kitchen, in the corner near the stove, not moving, barely breathing. This was not a dream. This silence, this detachment from my body, none of it was a dream. It was all very real, and I expected that every few months I would awaken from a dream again, thinking that this entire state of affairs was an incubus of bad times and nothing more. That the torment itself was all in my head. Then, as the scenario played itself out, I would 'awaken' from my trance and realize that this was far from a dream. That this desolate reality truly did exist, and there was nothing I could do about it. Times just weren't right.

"Times just aren't right..." I repeated to myself with a touch of desertion in my voice, "I'm not... I'm not hopeless. Am I?" I questioned to the barren kitchen that I sat it. "Of course not. Of course I'm not."

It was times like these that I still wished I held ignorance in my life, that I didn't feel the need to pry every bit of truth out of everyone.

"This is my fault." I accused myself, and I believed every word of the accusations. "All these wasted thoughts I've had, all the twisted actions I've taken to reveal the truth. The endless thirst for truth has lead me here." My breathing was erratic, speeding up and slowing down at seemingly random intervals. My mind raced to a million different places at once, seeing my life flash before my eyes several times, focusing in on key moments that I wasn't sure existed, but believed they did anyway. I saw how I treated my mother, the path that my actions caused her to take. This was my fault, and I knew it. "Am I dying?" I said aloud for no reason, not realizing I did, too swarmed by the endless chaos swirling throughout my head.

I was dizzy, and I wasn't entirely sure what I was doing. I reached up to the counter, and I knocked something off it that clanked to the ground. I felt around for whatever it was I knocked over, and felt a sudden pain shot through my arm. Through blurred vision I saw that my hand was now bleeding, but I couldn't process what was going on. I simply acted without thinking.

Through the chaos in my head I saw a glimmer of something metallic in my hands, and then everything stopped. Everything was crystal clear. I was holding a knife in my hands, and I watched in slow motion as my muscles flexed and forced the knife straight towards my chest. I saw as it ripped each strand of my grey t-shirt that was in it's way, I clearly saw the bits of blood that slowly left me when it punctured my skin, and I felt my heart beating faster and faster as I neared it with the knife. I heard the splatters of blood as it hit the floor and stained my pants, and I watched as the knife made a clear hole in my chest. I could see the muscle and bone clearly, and I saw the metallic knife turning red as it plunged deeper and deeper into me. I felt it hit the side of my heart. I truly felt it. I felt it hinder the beating. I felt my chest spasm and my heart slow down. I felt the knife physically stop my heart from working properly. I even felt it when the knife left my chest quickly, and I felt it when my heart stopped beating. I felt my head hit the ground when I fell, and I felt my arm split open as it fell upon the knife. My vision blurred again, this time very quickly, and I felt life leaving my body.

The last image I saw was of my mother crying. I told her that it was okay, but she could not hear me speak. She was standing over a casket.

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  #21  
Old 12-09-2008, 10:33 PM
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Default Re: Fade [UPDATED 11/27/2008]

?????, ?th, 20??
??:?? ?M


Death was not how I would have imagined it. Of course, in every novel I had read, in every movie I had seen, this was the sentence foreshadowing the description of death, and I was skeptical to think it was true. I would have thought it was a slow fade to black, and then nothing. No emotion, no thinking, no sound. Nothing. Instead it felt like watching the credits to a movie or video game, more than anything. Names and faces scrolled by, along with their significance in your life. Important events played in the background as this happened, and some sort of music was rendered in the background. Of course, I could neither see nor hear any of this in actuality (if that is what it could have been called at this point), but I could feel it there. I could think it there.

I could see my mother as she stood there making breakfast for me when I was about five, then it switched to a scene of my first bath, followed by my first time eating solid foods, my first few steps (though my mom literally forced me to take them) came after that, and then my first ride in a car. Every significant event, every insignificant event played for me. Not in quick flashes as if I was seeing my life flash before my eyes as I thought I had, but rather at a comfortable pace, one that I could keep up with, one that let me cherish every moment for the perfect amount of time before switching it to another moment. And cherish them I did, as I had reason to believe that this would be the last time I would see them. Of course, I had no way of knowing exactly what would come next, but I think it was solid guess that the subsequent event foreshadowing me was the empty, emotionless nothingness that death was often described as. Knowing this, I put all of my effort into savoring every sound and sight that presented itself to me at this moment. The problem was that I didn’t know how long this moment would last, and it scared me when the pictures began fading.

The sounds were still very vivid, and seemed to be getting more real as time passed. I heard the sounds from the many times I had been put into the hospital as a kid, like when I was cut with a knife in the arm. I could feel the bandages that were placed on my arm to help the cut heal, and I heard the voices that told my mother it was okay.

“It’s okay, Shaun. We’ve gotcha covered.” I heard the doctor say to me, and I felt myself nod weakly.

I also felt the bandages that were over my chest, which jolted my memory again. I had cut myself on the arm and the chest when I was young, though I couldn’t remember why or how. The bottom line was that my remembrance was coming to an end, because as time went on, the memories became less and less memorable. It began with the big events: my mother’s death, my first day of school, and the like. They were all things that I remembered vividly, and this memory… This one seemed like one that had just been created, though now that I had it in my thoughts, it felt like it had been there for ages. Either way, it was an insignificant one that I had just now remembered, and that told me that I was indeed nearing the void of death.

“Shaun.” I heard the doctor say again, this time his soft voice urged me to awaken from what I assumed was the sleep induced by anesthesia.

“No.” I wanted to tell him, “I can’t wake up this time…” My voice trailed into an echo, and when it disappeared, everything began to fade. Not to black, as I would have expected, but it faded to white. A bright white light that concentrated itself more and more with passing time, as if someone had placed a very bright light up against my face, and was now moving it slowly away, revealing more and more of my surrounding landscape.

“He’s coming to.” I heard the doctor’s soft voice say again, and I also heard shuffling feet in the background, getting louder as they approached.
The light dimmed slightly, and I was able to see more of the area that I was in. Of course, the area was all white, so it didn’t give me much an idea of where I was. In fact, I wasn’t even sure if I was, much less where.

“Shaun?” I heard a familiar female voice call, but I couldn’t pinpoint whose it was. It was a lovely voice.

The glare backed off further, and I immediately knew something; I was somewhere. I could feel everything now, from the air itself to the surface that I was laying on. I noticed the presence of three people in the room, but again, I couldn’t pinpoint who they were. The doctor was on my right, close to the shoal of whatever I was resting on, and the familiar sounding female was towards my feet.

“Pull down to 5ccs” The doctor ordered someone who was behind him, and I heard that person move his or her hands around and place something in something else.

I stared at the familiar female, though I was too blinded to actually know whether I was actually staring, or whether my eyes were even open for the matter.

“Hey, Shaun.” I heard her say, and I could tell she was smiling. I was staring at her without a doubt, and as I did I could see her face and body outlining themselves more clearly. Colors began to make themselves out. Tan skin, well toned, a black tank top, and black hair.

“Aura.” I breathed. Everything became very confusing all of the sudden, and I snapped my eyes shut. I heard the doctor shift and whom I presumed to be Aura rush over to me.

“Shaun!” She frantically yelled, and I think I held up my finger to indicate for her to hold on a moment.

“I’m fine.” I said bluntly, and I searched my mind for answers.

I had died, that much was obvious, and yet I seemed to be very much alive. I was somewhere, yet that was impossible if my memory of my actions was correct. I made a face an opened my eyes.
Everything was very clear (visually), and it became obvious where I was. It was a hospital room, and the unidentified person was a nurse who was managing whatever medicine was being pumped into me. Of course, if medicine was being pumped into me, that meant that there was an IV in my somewhere, but since I didn’t feel it, I forced myself not to search for it. The doctor was indeed a doctor, one with smooth blond hair and glasses. The other girl was indeed whom I speculated.

“Hello, my dear.” I said.

“Shaun!” She said, very relieved that I was alive and well. I think. “How are you feeling? Do you hurt anywhere? Are you hungry? What can I get you? Are you feeling okay? Anything else you need?”

She needed to take a deep breath.

“Whoa…” I said, confused by all of the questions. “Gimme a second…” I thought about all the questions, the order that they had been put in, and what my answers should be. “Okay.” I took a deep breath.

“I don’t know yet, I think so, yes, some Mongolian beef, again, I don’t know yet, and a hug.” I smiled. She gave me a sarcastic look.
“I can do the last one. The other ones you’ll have to reiterate later”, and she bent in to hug me gently. Her body was rather warm, but my knowledge of medicine told me that I was just rather cool.

“Now.” I said, looking at the doctor, and he raised an eyebrow, “I have a single question. Well, I have many questions, but I have one question for right now; how many IVs are in me?” He smiled. “Just two.” I grimaced, “How many can you take out of me?” He smiled again, “Just two.” And he approached me carefully, making sure not to bump any of the medical instruments. I held my breath and braced myself for the removal, but before I knew it, they were out. I looked at my arms, stretched them out, and placed them at my sides.

“You may begin to feel some pain in your chest or arm, as one of those IVs was comprised of painkillers, but for the most part it should stay pretty mellow.”
I nodded and turned back to Aura, “So, here comes the bombardment.” I took another deep breath, “What” I paused, decided on what words would make the question fancy, but understandable, “the hell?” I finished.

“Happened?” She inquired, “Well, I don’t know everything, but here’s what I do know.” She paused, clearly decided on where to start, “At some point on October 4th, you attempted suicide.” I nodded my head, remembering that much clearly. “You stabbed yourself in the chest with a kitchen knife, and upon falling to the ground, your arm landed on the knife which you had dropped, which split your arm open.” She winced at the thought, and I glanced at my bandaged chest and arm. They stung a bit, and it was getting worse, but it was still very manageable. “Luckily,” She continued, “Your assisted living personnel arrived mere seconds after you fell to the ground, and, as she has extensive medical training, she put pressure on the chest wound to keep you alive. Emergency services arrived a few minutes later, and you were rushed here. You had lost a lot of blood, enough to have you dead in an hour, but they gave you more. Did you know that you’re type O?” She asked. I shook my head, not giving her a chance to elaborate on the subject. “Anyway, after I heard the report on the news, I rushed here to make sure you were okay. Of course, you were completely knocked out as a result of heart surgery to suture the piercing, but I just waited. Now, you’re awake.”

It was all very confusing, and it took me a minute to process, but at least now I knew the facts. “What day is it?” I blurted, not really thinking about it.

“Umm.” She paused, thinking for a moment, “It’s Friday the 9th. You’ve been out for a few days.” “Time?” I asked. She glanced at her watch. “3:32 PM”

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Old 12-09-2008, 10:35 PM
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Default Re: Fade [UPDATED 11/27/2008]

October 9, 2009
3:32 PM


I felt alive, that much was certain. I couldn’t say that all of my complaints had shrunk to nothing, but at least I was alive. If anything, I was glad for this one day of comfort, if only because I had suffered. The pain in my arm was actually greater than the one in my chest, and I thought about why that could be. I didn’t realize that I was staring at my arm attentively until the doctor broke me from my dreamlike stance.

“You cut your arm pretty deep.” He said calmly, with little emotion, “We nearly had to amp it.” His wording confused me. “Amp?” I questioned.

“Amputate, of course.” He said, this time his voice was filled with much more joy. He smiled a wide, bright smile, “You have the wonderful staff here to thank for the fact that we saved your arm.”

“My thanks cannot be counted.” I replied, matching his sophistication of diction. I’m not sure why, but that tended to happen with my. Unless the eloquence of the other person was rather bland, then mine tended to become more elegant.

“Regardless, everything we have isn’t good news.” His face became suddenly solemn, and he took a breath. “Unfortunately, the wound on your chest was severe enough that you will have to stay in the hospital for a week or two. On top of that, you’ll be forced to attend psychiatric therapy twice a week, Mondays and Thursdays.” He showed a faint smile, and then motioned for the nurse to bring in a tray. On it, I saw some food, which smelled amazing, and two gifts wrapped in a cloak of red paper. I looked at the doctor, puzzled. “Just open them.” He said easily.

I waited a moment for some explanation, but I received none, neither from the doctor, or the nurse. Shrugging, I slowly tore open the small gift, which was about the size of an envelope, to reveal an envelope. “Not particularly exciting.” I said blankly, “But thanks.”

The doctor chuckled, and then folded his arms. He knew something I didn’t know, and I was too curious not to ask. “You know something I don’t know. What is it?”

He chuckled again, this time much louder, and said simply, “Envelopes are for opening, Shaun.”

I smiled. Of course I knew that, but it was too entertaining not to play dumb every once in a while.

I slit the envelope ajar, and pulled out the contents. It was a small envelope with the words, Per Diligo written on the front. I looked at it puzzled, and then I heard a shift in the corner.

“It means ‘With Love’ in Latin.” Aura said, as if a teacher who was very excited to see her student learning.

It was clear now whom the envelope was from, and I couldn’t help but smile. Aura was my shining beacon right now. A shining beacon I was very happy to follow.
When I opened the envelope, a small card dropped out. I picked it up, and it proved to be a credit card. At least, I thought it was.

“It’s from your mom.” Aura said from the corner she was standing in, “She willed her entire financial earnings to you, and this is what you’ve got. Just about a hundred thousand dollars, if you add insurance and all of her stocks.”

I was awestruck. My mom was rich, and she actually hid it from me just so when she died I would be set. “Holy shit…” Is all I could say. Of course, just as I finished getting over this spectacular event, something else dropped from the card. On it, a short message was scrawled.

October 10th, 7 PM
Meet you in the south hall of the hospital!
~Aura


“I have no idea what this means, Aura.” And I looked up to interrogate it out of her. Of course, she was gone. I sighed and noticed the doctor looking at me, this time he was puzzled. “It’s nothing.” I said, “I’m just a little confused is all.” I waited a moment, and then put the first gift down. Though, why I was getting gifts at all eluded me.
The second one was larger, about the size of a laptop or something of the like, and when I opened it, it revealed itself to be a laptop.
“I know you surf the web a lot, so I figured that you’d been one of these for your stay here.”

“You… you bought me this?” I was astonished, “Why?” was all I could manage to say.
“Aside from the fact that I’m on a doctor’s salary? Aura told me about what happened, and I was an acquaintance to your mother.” He said, “I would hope that you’ll put it to good use.”

It finally clicked where I knew him from. He was the family (meaning my and my mother’s doctor) doctor for the first eight years of my life until he moved to a nearby hospital to work. This must’ve been the nearby hospital. “Thanks. Doc…?” I questioned his last name, forgetting it from years past.

“Daneeka.” He answered, “Doctor Edward Daneeka.” He gave me an affirming nod indicating that he was very welcome to give the gift. “I’ll give you a bit to set it up, as I have a few other patients to tend to. Be back in a few hours.” And with that, he stepped out of the room and I was alone.

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  #23  
Old 12-09-2008, 10:40 PM
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Default Re: Fade [UPDATED 12/09/2008]

Ugh, how could I have possibly missed this!? It's just lovely, Charbok, and AMAZING for a first fiction. You take advantage of first-person in a very fresh, intuitive way, not to mention that the protagonist seems like a REALLY deep thinker, an inquiring fellow. And that's always good. I'm really enjoying this.

Keep up the good work!
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  #24  
Old 12-21-2008, 08:36 PM
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Default Re: Fade [UPDATED 12/09/2008]

October 9, 2009
4:11 PM


Upon starting up the laptop, I was prompted for a username and password. Rather than create a new one, I disabled the option to relieve the computer of the duties of keeping more than one user separate. Of course, there was one thing I wanted to look up before anything else; what the hell happened to the turmoil in Arizona? It was a touchy subject, as it reminded me more and more of my mother’s death, but I knew I couldn’t keep it away from myself forever, so I might as well do it now.
I opened the browser, and sat back against the disgustingly plastic pillow to wait for the page to load. To my surprise, it was loaded before my head pressed against the pillow, and then I remembered that I was not on my home computer at the moment.
I sat back up and went straight to the first news website I thought of. What I expected was that the turmoil had spread to another city, maybe two, and then been eradicated by military force. What I learned as the truth was quite a good amount worse than that.
The first headline I saw was “President Still Stumped; The Crisis Seems to Be Gaining STEAM” and I once again found myself wide eyed and open mouthed at the entire idea that this could still be going on, much less gaining speed. I scrolled to the link (using the little pad which I looked upon with a disgust that amounted to absolute detestation) and clicked it. This time I was ready when the article popped up, and I immediately scanned through it to pick out important points or ideas.
After a quick few minutes, I had picked out the portions that I deemed worth reading, and the contents of those excerpts literally had me frozen to the point of disbelief.
The crisis that had hit Arizona was one I had deemed irrelevant and under-control. When it hit Michigan, I had given it the title of ‘dangerous, but manageable’. And now, as of 2:00 PM on October 9, 2009, the exact crisis that was once under control had staggered and squirmed past governmental authority, past military force, and past moral judgment to administer it’s plague to eleven major cities, as well as thousands of smaller areas.
“And here’s the punch line…” I said sarcastically, scrolling down the page. STEAM’s ideals were not merely confined to the minds of the United States citizens anymore. The populace of Bangkok, Berlin, Paris, Stockholm and Mexico City had all developed their own ideas based off of STEAM’s radical agenda. In addition, New York City, Los Angeles, Seattle, Dallas, Philadelphia, and Denver had all created branches of STEAM ideology and were currently living their lives doing whatever the hell they wanted. Total death toll of the crisis: Forty Thousand and Eleven, with thousands more still missing.
“How is that possible?” I questioned truth, palms sweating and heart racing as I scoured the article for answers. I found them upon locating an article titled “Timeline”. I clicked it, and what came up was exactly what I was looking for.

September 29, 2009 – 3:10 PM

Riot break out in Arizona, RIOT police are called in. The riots incited by STEAM, an anarchist organization who claims to be creating ‘true freedom’.

September 29, 2009 – 1:25 AM

Riot police failed to hold back STEAM. The President activates the National Guard.

September 29, 2009 – 10:20 AM

STEAM has spread to Detroit, creating STEAM{2}. National Guard is called in.

September 29, 2009 – 10:40 AM

The president issued a statement, saying that action will be taken against STEAM quickly and swiftly the end this crisis.


I skipped through the rest of the 29th, focusing on my emotional hiatus so I could gain a better grasp of what exactly had happened to let things get this far out of hand.

October 1, 2009 –12:00 PM

The crisis still stands, and has received sympathy from many Americans. Rumors of terrorist cells connected to steam and attacks planned for major cities spread across the country.

October 1, 2009 – 4:11 PM

President declares martial law is to be imposed on all major U.S. cities. National Guard troops deployed to cities with populations over fifty thousand. Curfew from 8 AM to 8 PM. The president has departed for Camp David.

October 2, 2009 – 8:45 AM

President has officially entered Camp David, other heads of state are in undisclosed secure locations. Congress has been placed in an emergency shelter, but no other information has been disclosed.

Branches of STEAM, or similar support groups have taken four more U.S. cities. Los Angeles, Seattle, Dallas, and Philadelphia were the first cities to be placed under martial law. The cities may be more effectively described as war zones, due to the high casualty count.

Total death toll from the riots: 846
Total Missing: 245

October 2, 2009 – 11:00 PM

STEAM has formed a militia, which is using guerilla tactics in planned assaults against troops. The situation is at a near standoff in two cities, Seattle and Dallas, while the National Guard has regained control in Philadelphia, and STEAM has blockaded Los Angeles.

Death Toll (approximate):
STEAM and other insurgents: 1,800
National Guard and police: 1,500
Civilians: 1,000

October 4, 2009 – 12:00 PM

STEAM continues relentless attacks on National Guard troops and other Federal buildings. No official death toll is being counted, and journalists are unable to report, as any attempt to contact STEAM results in violent rebuttal. The president ordered curfew to be shortened to 12AM to 6PM.

October 5, 2009 – 11:08

A tape sent by a journalist in northern California shows the shocking warfare taking place on American soil: survivalist groups from as far away as the Black Hills, South Dakota have arrived to support the National Guard with their own firepower. While the National Guard initially attempted to disarm and arrest the militias, deteriorating conditions in nearby Eldorado National Forest allowed for the survivalists to enter combat, a move which counters the unorthodox methods and asymmetrical warfare of STEAM.

October 7, 2009 – 7:54 PM

STEAM has spread across the globe, affecting Stockholm and Paris. The United States is model for other countries looking to stop their own insurrections. Top sociologists and political analysts are describing the situation as the next American Civil War. Non-essential military personnel from the Middle East are being returned to reinforce the National Guard. STEAM has grown to nearly 80,000 members within the U.S., and 200,000 globally.

October 8, 2009 – 4:11 PM

The reinforcements that can find a safe airport to land at are assisting the National Guard, but many of the forces returning home are told to leave or be shot out of the air or sea. Several troop transports have already been shot down near the Los Angeles area. It is estimated that 20,000 members of the Armed Services and Police force have sided with STEAM based on their own beliefs. STEAM now possesses a stronger military force, more suited to open combat.

October 9, 2009 – 1:09 PM

STEAM has annexed the states of California, Nevada, and Arizona. The STEAM states have declared open war on the United States, and the president has issued a statement of resiliency to the leaders of STEAM. It is estimated that 90% of the controlled states are now STEAM friendly, with dissenters executed or exiled.


An open mouth is the only thing that wasn’t completely limp at this point. With each passing entry to the timeline, I felt my body grow weaker and weaker, losing energy. It was all I could do to keep my breathing steady as I stared blankly at the page. Only when I saw a new article titled “Journal Entries, Home Video and other first party accounts of the STEAM outbreak” did my lack of concentration come to an end. I clicked it maniacally, which only further fueled my addiction to a drug that had no upside.


They were literally all the things that everyone told you were impossible, that it was something no one would ever have to worry about; and it was happening right in front of my eyes. This was the stuff that nightmares were made of.
I shoved the laptop away from me, my racing heart made all the more obvious by the monitor on the wall. What was I supposed to do? What the hell was I supposed to do? I found myself asking myself those two questions again and again. At this rate, the entire globe would be swallowed by this tsunami of accursed judgment and idiocy, and the worst part was… That people didn’t care. It wasn’t like an oppressive group was forcing them to go along with anything, or that they were some under-vocalized mass that wanted to return to the good of times past; This was a mass produced idea that people actually agreed with, and that’s what scared me the most. Because if everyone agreed with it except me, then did I matter? Quality judgment and moral code is dictated by the masses, and history has told that the masses have just seemed to agree on the same basic principles; Do not kill, do not steal, do not assault etc. Of course, there have been exceptions, but those exceptions were always eradicated by the overbearing amount of people who agreed with the sound ideas. Now the scenario was flipping itself, going against the pattern of history. Now the exceptions will become the masses, and moral judgment would become the exception.

“The exception that was always eradicated by the masses.”

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  #25  
Old 12-21-2008, 08:36 PM
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Default Re: Fade [UPDATED 12/09/2008]

October 9, 2009
5:12 PM


My head was bowed in silent reverence, and the bed sheets below me were filled with the tears of sorrow that I had shed for nearly half an hour. Only days ago had the world appeared to be at least half normal, though there would always be exceptions. Now the people I was close to, the majority of many parts of this country, were falling into a spiral of rash judgment and desensitized morality that seemed to tug at me. I resisted, but it became more and more difficult as more and more people fell victim to it. I was scared-terrified, even-that maybe those close to me (as few as there were) would also fall victim to it, and then those few people I didn’t know who agreed with me would follow, and finally me. I shook my head, removing the thought from my brain, but like a knife on a bungee cord, it just bounced back and stabbed me again, lodging itself in place. Either I had to live with the idea stuck in my head forever, or shake it off for only a moment only to have it smash back into me, causing more pain than before, but giving me a small moment of comfort.
Everything seemed that way now. Either I was happy now, and placed in absolute despair later, or I was just in a less agonizing pain all of the time. Drugs were an example of this temporary elation, as was the idea of credit and money lending. Though, the former I had never experienced myself, it was rather obvious the effects it had. Only once had I considered succumbing to the irrational decision to smoke pot, and since that refusal I had scoured my mind for a single reason not to do it. There were no permanent medical side effects, and all it was, was being happy. Is it such a bad thing to be happy? Who doesn’t want to be happy? Answering no to the latter question would prove me insane, but answering yes would force me into the dark hole I so desperately avoided. The random rebuttals I had were useless things like “It’s bad” and “Don’t do it, it’s bad.” Basically the same monotonous answers your parents gave you when you asked about it. Occasionally I found myself on the verge of discovering a suitable answer, only to have it lost in my train of thought.
I remembered once when a friend of mine (who was a pot-head of sorts) asked me why I didn’t smoke pot. I flat out told him one simple phrase.
“I know people who smoke pot, a lot of them. Friends or enemies, it didn’t matter. Every time I tried to talk to them, to reason with them about anything, I felt emptiness. My hands searched for them, my arms were outstretched towards them. I almost felt them on my fingertips, and I got excited because I thought for one moment that maybe I was getting through to them, getting them to show me their rational side, their caring side. Every time I did this, my hopes rose to the point of near elation, only to be destroyed by the logic that clouded their minds. I don’t know if it’s just coincidence, but every single person who did this to me smoked or did drugs in one way or another. After the crash of this high created by realistic happiness that maybe there was an ounce of decency in someone, that maybe there was someone capable of true loving and understanding of basic principles, I felt dead. I knew I was still alive, still very alive, but the destruction of my hope thickened the air I breathed and suffocated my emotions in a way that I have never experienced before. The worst part was the hope these people gave me. I could feel them all around me as living breathing souls, and from that distance I felt that they had this decency that I searched for. But upon closer inspection I realized who these people were. They were shells, in layman’s terms, eggs; Eggs that looked to contain a beautiful chick, but when examined, only contained air. Nearly every person I knew had fallen into this pit. Worse, people I once loved, that I still love, and sometimes people that I wished I didn’t love had fallen into it, and didn’t have the judgment to escape it. I don’t do drugs, and I don’t drink for that simple reason; I don’t want to be the one to cause emptiness in others. Worse, I don’t want to be the one to cause emptiness in myself. I don’t want this empty, saddening bliss.”
I didn’t realize until just that moment that I was speaking aloud, and that I had never actually said any of that to anyone, ever. My mind snapped back to reality, and before I lost it, I immediately filed the speech away in my head. It came as shock when I saw Doc Daneeka standing at the foot of the bed, smiling with despair.
“You’ve got a lot on your mind, Shaun.” He said, “Maybe a little too much?”
“Maybe.” I breathed, and I looked around the room. “When did you get here?”
“About five minutes ago.” He replied, now checking various beeping instruments and beeping electronics around the room. “How’s the laptop working?” He asked.
It wasn’t until now that I noticed the laptop, hot on my legs, still on the web page. I immediately closed it and took a deep breath. “It’s great, thanks a ton.”
“Good to hear.” He fuddled with something for a moment, and then continued, “Is it okay if we move another patient in here with you? We’ve run out of room in the intensive watch ward, and this is the closest room to the nurse’s station. He won’t be a bother. He’s in a coma.”
I thought for a moment concerning how I would feel about having a coma patient in here with me. He wouldn’t be any blatant bother to me, but the idea of having an unconscious human next to me was… unnerving. On the other hand, the doc did give me the laptop and cared for me very strongly, it was the least I could do. “Sure, no problem. What’s he in for?”
“Doctor patient confidentiality, remember? But thank you.” He winked at me, nodded a goodbye, and then exited the room after being summoned by a nurse.
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  #26  
Old 01-29-2009, 02:01 AM
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Default Re: Fade [UPDATED 12/21/2008]

I've never read anything more brilliant..and well, as mind-blowing as your story, Charbok. A pure stroke of genius. You must become an author and publish this book! Well, when your finished, of course. Do you think you could e-mail it to me so I can print it out? So I can read it whenever I'm bored? xD Just private message me. I love it! -faints-
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Old 01-29-2009, 02:05 AM
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Default Re: Fade [UPDATED 12/21/2008]

Quote:
Originally Posted by The Thoughts of Warhol View Post
I've never read anything more brilliant..and well, as mind-blowing as your story, Charbok. A pure stroke of genius. You must become an author and publish this book! Well, when your finished, of course. Do you think you could e-mail it to me so I can print it out? So I can read it whenever I'm bored? xD Just private message me. I love it! -faints-
Haha, wow. I'm glad you like it! If you want (and you swear not to steal the work and use it as your own for profit! =P) I can keep you updated on it via e-mail or something. Because as you can see, I've sort of stopped updating it here on Pe2k. Though, I will be updating it further in the "Other: Fan Fiction" section, so watch there.
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Old 01-29-2009, 02:34 AM
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Default Re: Fade [UPDATED 12/21/2008]

Quote:
Originally Posted by Charbok View Post
Haha, wow. I'm glad you like it! If you want (and you swear not to steal the work and use it as your own for profit! =P) I can keep you updated on it via e-mail or something. Because as you can see, I've sort of stopped updating it here on Pe2k. Though, I will be updating it further in the "Other: Fan Fiction" section, so watch there.
yea. I won't steal it. I respect writers. Uhm...Just add me to MSN, and I'll give you my email address.
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Old 01-29-2009, 03:56 AM
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Default Re: Fade [UPDATED 12/21/2008]

Well, your good comments made me want to put more up, so click the link in my sig to see the next few bits of it.
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