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Old 01-07-2010, 12:50 AM
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Default The Evolution of YOUR Writing

I saw how in DeviantArt, there was this meme going around where people would post some of their art from years 2003 to 2009 and their own comments to see how well they improved. I thought it would be neat if I did that but to see how my writing improved and evolved. Then I thought I could ask the Pe2K authors to do one themselves to showcase their writing, especially since 2010 is barely starting. So come on, guys! Don't be shy! :)

(You don't have to start from 2005. I started there because anything earlier than that has been thrown out over the years .)


This is the year I got into writing fan fiction, and my first and only choice was Danny Phantom, my favorite cartoon. While I knew about description, it was bland and in list-form. Also, my knowledge of the comma was close to none, and I never proofread my work before I posted it. This is an excerpt of a Danny Phantom/Scooby-Doo crossover I did in 2005 called "From Fake to Real". It was never finished because I never bothered to plan out anything. It would take a few more tries for me to learn THAT lesson.


It was a cold night in San Francisco, CA and once again the famous Mystery Inc. have solved yet another case. This one was about a ghost of a social worker haunting a factory nearly running it out of business.

“And so the ghost is...”, said Fred the unofficial leader of the gang. After a few seconds of dramatic suspense he pulled of the mask of the so-called ghost.

“Marty Morey!”, everybody in the eerie room gasped as they just discovered the lonely old man that everybody knew and loved was the ghost that was terrorizing the Fizzy Pop Factory out of business.

“But why Marty? Why did you do this to me?”, the boss of the factory cried out nearly breaking out in tears.

Bob Martinez and Marty Morey have been best friends since early childhood and couldn’t think of any reason why his best friend would do this to him.

“Because thirty years ago I signed up for a job in your factory and you rejected me.”, answered Marty to his former friend.

“But I told you the staff was full. I couldn’t fire somebody.”, said Bob.

“Well, I created the ghost of Peter Greenfield so the factory would close. And I would have gotten away with it if it wasn’t for those meddling kids and their stupid dog!”, Marty cried out the last part as it would’ve made a difference weather his plan worked or not.

“That’s another case solved for us ay Scoob?”, said Shaggy to his pal Scooby Doo walking beside both in a stride. Shaggy has messy brown with an oversize green T-shirt and brown pants.

“Yeah Yeah!”, said Scooby Doo bobbing his up and down. Scooby was a big brown dog with black spots. Also around his neck was a blue collar with a tag with the letters SD on it. Shaggy and Scooby are the funny bone in the gang and are always hungry for anything.

“Seriously, that was a tough case to solved.”, said Velma cleaning her black rimmed glasses. Velma had short brown with glasses that made her look pretty smart, which she is. Than she has an orange sweater and skirt. Velma is the one that comes up with the plans for capturing the ghosts, vampires, werewolves etc.

“I personally thought it was it was pretty obvious”, Fred said running a hand through his sandy blonde hair. He had a red ascot around his neck and a white shirt. To complete the outfit was a pair of blue jeans. Fred knew when to take charge.

“I agree.” , said Daphne with her long red hair and purple dress and purple hair band. She was the beauty queen even though she wasn’t stuck up. Fred and Daphne liked each other that’s why they always split up together and everybody knew this.

As they boarded into the Mystery Machine Fred turned on the radio and a news bulletin came up, “Over here in Amity Park, OR the infamous ghost kid “Inviso-Bill” and another unknown ghost were seen destroying the town high school Casper High. We need people to get rid of this menace once and for all. There is a reward for anybody who stops the ghost kid. That is all.” When the bulletin was over heavy metal rock music came on.

“So guys, who wants to go to Amity Park?”, Fred asked looking at his friends.

“Well, it would be nice to help those people from that ghost kid.”, Daphne said hoping the others would agreed.

“Imagine all the pizzas and hamburgers we could buy with the reward.”, said Shaggy imagining his dream of junk food.

“Rizzas and ramburgers!”, Scooby exclaimed clearly thinking on the food and not the ghost kid that has been known to cause damage in Amity Park for the past eight months.

“It would be intriguing to see if the ghosts are real or not.”, Velma said thinking of the possibilities of actually seeing real ghosts rather than guys in cheesy outfits.

“Then it’s settled then. We’re going to Amity Park!”, Fred said and everybody cheered.

As they made their way to Amity Park they didn’t know the adventure that lay ahead of them.

Again, all I wrote was Danny Phantom fan fiction. My description got better and it didn’t seem as forced, but my grammar and proofreading skills still needed serious polishing (I’m sad that nobody bothered to point out the blatant comma misusage in dialogue during these two years). This is where I started writing pieces that were more emotional than plot-driven. The following is an excerpt of a Danny Phantom one-shot called "Wanderer".


That day at the Nasty Burger was my last one. And it is one I will never forget. I will never forget the terrified faces of my family, friends, and teacher as they were strapped to that boiler. I will never forget the malicious face on my evil self as he watched his victims squirm. Before I went to battle, I promised them that I would never allow myself to turn evil, that will never become most feared ghost on the planet. The battle was the toughest one I’ve ever faced but I finally sucked him in the Fenton Thermos. All was going well, until I saw the boiler ready to blow. I stood up and ran. I tried to go ghost but I was too weak. I can still see their pleading eyes, full of fear and hope, urging me to hurry. As I was running, I tripped and fell painfully on the ground. I looked up and witnessed the death of my loved ones. The explosion happened in a matter of seconds. The boiler and everybody who strapped on it were engulfed in a fiery torrent, sparing no mercy. The explosion grew and grew into it covered the whole restaurant. The force was so great that it sent flying backwards to the nearest building. When my head hit the wall, my world blackened.

I woke up days later but not as myself. I wasn’t a ghost but a spirit, a memory. I looked around and saw that most of the rubble and debris has been cleared away. Not a single soul was on the street. A newspaper article rustled on the ground near me. I try to grab it, but I just went through it. Floating above it, I noticed the article was about the accident. A photo showed my family and I. My heart suddenly ached when I saw it. The photo was taken on the last day of summer before our freshman year. My parents and Jazz were smiling at the camera with grins. I was playing around with Tucker and Sam in the middle. I blinked away the tears that were threatening to fall. Below the picture was an announcement about a funeral being held in the cemetery. Deciding to go, I took one last look at the photo and flew away.

Watching my own funeral was heartbreaking. People were crying and weeping at the sight of our bodies in the caskets. Mine was the only one who wasn’t damaged beyond belief. I could barely recognize them when I saw them. I saw Dash and Kwan walking over to my body in hesitant steps.

“Why did we bullied him?”, asked Dash to Kwan with tears.

Kwan didn’t respond, only kept on staring at my lifeless corpse. I didn’t think they would come, seeing on how they shoved me into my locker every chance they got. They walked silently away from the casket with their heads looking at the ground. I was left speechless. Another figure drew closer this one's face masked by the shadows of the trees. The figure lifted her head. Valerie’s eyes were brimming with tears, droplets falling to the petals of the single red rose in her hands.

“Oh god, Danny.”, she cried out.

I closed my eyes and looked away. It pained me to see people suffer for my mistakes, even if it wasn’t physically. I wished I could’ve comforted her in some way, to tell her I was still here but I knew I couldn’t. I reopened my eyes and saw Valerie bent down and rest he rose in my casket. She was about to leave but she was hesitant. Valerie leaned over and kissed me on the lips. She rose up and brushed tears from her green eyes that were flowing freely.

“Goodbye Danny.”

Like the jocks, she lowered her head and walked away.

“Valerie!”, I yelled after her.

“Come back!”

Valerie could not hear me so she kept on walking away. I watched her disappear into the horizon with no clue that I was here. I lowered my outstretched hand with a tear streaking face. That was the last I remembered.

(Banner by the epic Neo Pikachu) TAC Challenge: I'm learning Finnish! ^-^

My Author Profile | URPG Stats | Kat x Bryce

Last edited by Phantom Kat; 01-07-2010 at 12:53 AM.
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Old 01-07-2010, 12:52 AM
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Default Re: The Evolution of YOUR Writing


And this is when I joined Pe2K! Thanks to many helpful reviews, my grammar improved dramatically, especially those pesky dialogue rules. Description also improved as my vocabulary expanded and I got into the habit of incorporating details through actions. Now, I left the Danny Phantom fandom almost completely to immerse myself in Pokémon URPG stories (and a fan fiction I never finished). If the improvement in my work doesn’t show that the members on this forum are extremely helpful and encouraging, I don’t know what does. This is an excerpt of my first URPG story, "A Melancholy Melody".


“Rise and shine, Mel!”

Though the voice was only meant for my ears, the voice rebounded off the small room, making the Pokemon around me stir and snap their eyes open. Their eyes, veiled by sleepiness, targeted the small figure near the opening of the cave. A wave of deep annoyance swept over them just like it did every morning.

“Ruck, how rude!” one of them exclaimed, her voice shrill this early in the morning. The others around her nodded in agreement. From the shelves that were littered with hay nests, small forms snuggled back in order to sleep some more. Angry mutterings as they did this told me they weren’t so happy.

I, however, stretched out my curled up ears and arms with a wide yawn, grateful for the wake up call, Ho-Oh knew I always overslept. With his usual broad smile, Ruck walked over to me and gave me a helping hand up from my nest.

“’Morning, Mel,” he greeted, voice still abnormally loud. “How are you this fine morning?”

“Alright,” I responded before glancing back at my roommates who grudgingly tidied up their nests when sleep was apparently lost for the day. “Although I’m not too sure about them.”

Ruck dismissed this with a wave of his pink paw as though shooing a fly out of his face.

“Come on, they would have woken up anyway.”

The glares that were probably being sent my way felt as though they were boring into my back like pins. With a sheepish smile, I led my fellow Whismur out of the dormitory and into the main hall of the cave complex. Stalagmites rose like towers around us as though trying meet up with the stalactites above. Where they suceeded stood stone columns that could withstand decades. Water from the ceiling dripped down from the roof of the cave, using these natural structures to glide down to the ground where they lay as puddles near our feet. The Hoenn sunlight streamed in small beams from the cracks above us, lighting the mouths of separate dormitories where Whismur were walking out, some in high spirits while others in a sluggish pace.

“You know, I love mornings,” Ruck commented, head leaning back so that drips of water threatened to drop into his mouth. “It’s just gives you the feeling that this day will be better than the last.”

Looking at the dormitory openings as we passed, I saw many Whismur scowling as my friend’s comment sounded loudly in the hall. It wasn’t his fault though, Ruck always had a stronger voice than any other Whismur and even though this was said, some Pokemon still shunned him as some freak who did not respect other pokemon’s quiet atmosphere. Ruck didn’t mind being not well liked, he just enjoyed whatever the day brought him and I enjoyed his company all the same.

The hall was quickly filled with Whismur coming out of their dens, their morning chatter filling the atmosphere. All in a tight knot of bubble gum colored fur, it was hard to distinguish where one Whismur began and another ended. In their own individual groups, they paid no heed to us as we continued our talk.

“So what do you want to do later on?” I began, inclining my head in curiosity.

Ruck put a paw to his chin in mock thought, tongue stuck out to complete the look. He loved making me wait ‘cause Ruck knew I always grew impatient when he toyed with me. Finally, he grinned and related his plan.

“We can go to the back woods and pick some berries, you know, the ones on teh wild bushes. At night, we can go and sit on the hill where we can see the Ledian dance under the moonlight.”

A warm smile came across me at what Ruck, normally the joker, had suggested. Examining his face, I found no trace of lying, he was actually being sincere.

“That sounds wonderful.” I told him, my mind already looking forward to the trip hours from now. Away from the hustle and bustle in the colony, we could enjoy each other’s company, two best friends looking for a little solitude.

Where the hall ended, a looming opening led us into the dining area where all meals were served. At least three times as big as any den, the dining area was something to marvel from time to time. Its grand roof, high above our heads, held stalactites that seemed to wait until the perfect time to come crashing down in a blink of an eye. Here, the cracks were widened so that sunlight swept over the colony. Small wooden tables made from the bark of the forest trees littered the ground, big enough for two Pokemon to comfortably eat, already held the normal dead Wurmple. As Ruck and I headed to our normal table in the corner, separating ourselves from the giant mass of talking fur, I turned my head to glance at the front of the room. Three stone tables were conjoined into one long dining area where the Elders, Loudred and Exploud, ate. Despite their high position in the community, they still opt to eat the same meal we did. Yet, they ate with such politeness and cleanliness, not letting any amount of meat drop to the floor, that they seemed more like royals who had lost their way and ended up in this colony.

Somehow, someway, I actually got into the habit of proofreading my work. Wow. More grammar was fixed, this time dealing with complex sentences. Also, by this time, I got into collaborative writing, a whole new experience for me. This excerpt is from a URPG story Bryce and I wrote called "As the Crumbling Wall Tumbles".


Vincent hadn’t seen so much chaos since the day they were dragged out of their homes and thrown into the street among many other confused and terrified Jewish families.

The small children had bolted from their horrified stupors at the sudden, wailing sound. Some of them rushed towards their homes, while the ones that tripped and fell stayed on the ground as a sniffling and crying heap of baggy clothes. They backed away from the corpse of the Nazi officer as though they would contract a deadly disease if they came anywhere near it. From the nearby shacks, parents rushed out to scoop their children in their arms. Mothers and fathers alike had the same, worried expression on their sullen faces. They looked up at the speakers situated at the corners of the streets for only second before rushing back inside their homes.

All of this, though, Vincent ignored. The white-knuckled grip on Frederick’s wrist was the only thing that kept him from running home. The bodies that pushed and shoved against him in their haste to get away from the approaching Nazi officers were hardly felt. The blaring siren that tore through the air was an unimportant buzz in his ears. Even the putrid smell of rotting garbage on the sides of the streets was blocked out.

The only thing he was aware of was his hold on a stumbling Frederick. Vincent could feel the teen’s hairs on end. Was the shock of what he finally did starting to sink in? Even though it wasn’t he that murdered the cruel man, his own stomach was in a cycle of never-ending flips.

“Where are we going?” Frederick asked hoarsely. Whether the running or the situation was taking a toll on his voice, Vincent didn’t know.

“The hole in the wall,” he answered, also breathless.

The eight-year-old was lucky he didn’t have to think about where he was going, for his feet knew the route by heart. They raced through the buildings, through sidewalks, and past startled Jewish citizens. His breath would hitch whenever he caught sight of a pristine, olive-green uniform, but his feet pounding against the parched earth drowned out his rattling breath.

And after an eternity of shutting the world out, he saw the harsh, concrete wall that surrounded the ghetto before him. Marred with cracks and stains of aged blood, it loomed and intimidated the Jewish residents with its twenty-foot height and rusted, barbed wire that guarded the top like copper Ekans. Dried weeds and bushes void of any berries grew beside the hideous structure, and one could see where leaves were torn by kids desperate and hungry enough to eat the pathetic foliage.

Vincent and Frederick stumbled to a stop, the younger of the two already eyeing a particularly hideous bush to his right. Their escape from this godforsaken place was hidden behind the thorn-riddled branches.

A breeze devoid of any comfort swept through the ghetto, and with it, was Frederick’s words: “What now?”

It wasn’t until then that Vincent realized that he was still gripping the older Jew with all of his might. Letting go, he looked down in horror to find his hand slick with ruby blood. Jade eyes traveling from his hand to Frederick, he saw the teen’s hands and arms splattered with the Hoothoot’s blood and slivers of the entrails that had flown into the air. For a moment, the nauseating smell tempted Vincent to get on his knees and immediately crawl through the wall, but when he caught sight of Frederick’s face, he sharply averted his gaze.

The way blood trickled sluggishly from his jaw, how the dull sheen in his once jovial eyes was directed towards the hands that betrayed him, even his flower-dappled coat seemed to be grayer than usual. Vincent clenched his jaw, the silent Frederick scaring him more than the mangled Pokémon he had seen moments ago.

The blonde of fifteen seemed as uncomfortable as Vincent felt for he walked towards the wall and turned towards the eight-year-old with a strained smirk that didn’t reach his suddenly aged eyes.

“So what’re we going to do, bark at the wall so it can jump out of our way?” he quipped above the noise of the wailing alarm.

Vincent forced a grin. He didn’t care that the humor in the words was merely a façade; as long he didn’t stray to the fact that they were running for their lives, he welcomed any distraction.

“We’re going through it, actually. There’s a hole that leads to the forest.”

Then it struck him that Frederick might be too large to fit through the hole in the wall.

But we can’t go back, we’ll be killed!

Killed. It sounded so wrong coming from a child, but that was what would happen if the officers caught them; they would be killed, murdered just like the lost Hoothoot.

Not much to say here. Here, later in the year, I starting working on a fan fiction, and unlike back in 2007, I planned this one from chapter to the final chapter; I was hell-bent on not making the same mistake again. While working on this fan fiction, I learned how to really expand on a plot instead of writing the first thing that comes to mind. Also, I learned that a plot and its characters can change many times the more and more thought I put into it. Since URPG stories are short stories, I wasn’t used to expanding a single plot idea to its limits. This excerpt is from the first chapter of my current fan fiction, “My Guardian Angel”.


Of course, no matter how many Legendaries there were in the room, the pixie of ancestry could never ignore the great god in the center. With his flowing silver fur putting the polished walls to shame, their ten-foot-tall father was automatically the center of attention.

Then again, Mew thought, his spinning, golden wheel that encircles his waist and the four jades on each point always seem to magnify his majestic features.

“Arceus,” Mew addressed the Alpha Pokémon when he halted in mid-air. He gave a bow and held it, allowing him a view of the god’s pointed, topaz hooves. “I talked to the alien, as you requested.”

Every member of the Council of Legends drew in closer, their breaths hushed.

Was this strange creature a danger to Johto if he was allowed to stay? Lugia and Ho-Oh thought as one.

Was this alien powerful enough to possibly become a Legend? Celebi thought with a deep scowl on her face. The prospect of ruling alongside one who wasn’t even a Pokémon was a sour one.

Could this foreigner possibly take advantage of the weaker creatures in this world? Cresselia wanted to know.

“Please, do not jump to conclusions,” their quadruped leader calmly told them. As their father, he could feel their agitated thoughts, their worries, and immediate mistrust as though they were his own. His children relaxed though still shared meaningful glances. When it was clear their minds were relatively silent, Arceus returned to Mew. “What have you observed?”

The Kanto pixie straightened and said with a hint of boredom, “This alien is like a human child: curious and lost. He doesn’t seem too intelligent or resourceful.” Mew inclined his head to the side, a frown now stretched taut over his face; he was clearly frustrated that he didn’t have Deoxys completely figured out. “Power wise, it’s hard to tell. Even when my Psychic immobilized him, I could not delve into his mind to see how powerful this creature is. If I was able to, I might have also been able to decipher his strange language. I did manage to catch the name “Deoxys” very briefly through telepathy, however.” With a final sigh, Mew was done.

Not a minute had stretched of silence before Lugia spread his three-tipped wings and descended carefully to the ground. His long tail swished back and forth in his anxiousness, the two navy-colored spikes at the end threatening to send Shaymin and Jirachi flying. “We cannot allow this creature, this “Deoxys,” to stay,” he gruffly voiced. His coal-black eyes glittered with determination, and the two rows of blue spikes along his back were raised. Craning his long and elegant neck, he saw Ho-Oh, still on the pillar, nodding in agreement. “To underestimate his power is foolish. Who’s to say he’s not masking his abilities? Johto can lie in ruins if we’re too proud and dismiss the possibility.”

Cresselia came forward, the violet, celestial rings attached to her sloped back and arms shining while the twin crescents on either side of her head glowed like stars against the sky. Raising her yellow beak towards the Johto trio masters, she nodded to them before saying, “Lugia and Ho-Oh make a convincing argument. By disregarding this otherworldly being solely on Mew’s account, Pokémon and humans alike will be endangered. If we force Deoxys to return to space, we can avoid any possible catastrophes.”

Arceus acknowledged her words with a bow of his own head, then saw that the shadows next to him shivered and moved. He gracefully moved to let Darkrai have the floor. The Pitch-Black Pokémon let his forest-green orbs sweep over the Council of Legends, as though they all opposed his unspoken thoughts, then focused on Cresselia. The ruby spikes around his neck bristled ever so slightly; the billowing white shadows on his head lengthened. “Should we run out Deoxys, without evidence that he’s the monster you’re speculating, simply because he could endanger the humans?” Darkrai sent a sharp glare towards Lugia and Ho-Oh, the tattered edges of his body wildly flapping with unseen wind. “Wasn’t it humans who destroyed the Tin Tower? Isn’t it humans who pollute the lakes that Suicune purifies?”

Ho-Oh flapped her garnet wings so hard that the emerald tips threatened to fall. Like a flaming phoenix, the Rainbow Pokémon landed on the chamber’s floor. With golden tail feathers fanned out behind her, Ho-Oh regarded the nightmare creator with a steely, amber gaze. “Do not drag your past into Council affairs, Darkrai! You know perfectly well you were banished from Alamos Town due to your own nightmare-spreading frenzy.”

Fisting his hands, the Sinnoh Legendary growled, “You seem to forget that at the time there had been a hallucination-inducing sickness spreading. My nightmares were simply amplified, although it seems that humans and you neglect to take their epidemic into account.”
- Kat

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Last edited by Phantom Kat; 01-07-2010 at 12:54 AM.
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Old 02-05-2010, 09:07 PM
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Default Re: The Evolution of YOUR Writing

I like this idea. I'm going to help it before the thread dies. ^_^


This was the year I joined PE2K. Personally, I thought my writing sucked way back when. So, I started with a fanfiction that I never finished (that seems to be a problem matter of late), called Bonds of Friendship... Or even more. Personally, I don't know where I was going with this, but... I only wrote three paragraphs, and published it. Here's an excerpt;

It was a warm sunny day in the town of Pallet. Ash was finnaly done with the Shinou League. Ash was coming home to have a long rest. He thought to himself Where should I go now? I have been in evrey dierection to go, but is there more regions? Brock and the other girl left Ash at Veridian City, because they said they had to go somewhere. Ash had to do some shopping anyway. He was told by his mother at the Pokemoncenter that he had to get a few things for her. Mr. Mime, who was in the background, was playing with his child, Mime Jr., who had hatched a couple days ago. He had to get milk, bread, rice, peas, tell bakery password Shinou and not look in the box, flowers, and some Pokechow. He didn't knwo what to expect. He thought about more about the regions while he was walking carrying bags, Pikachu at his side, carrying the two cans of peas. Where else is theere to go? I'll ask Prof. Oak in the morning. It was a cold, winter night, so he wouldn't mind Glalie to come out as long as he promised not to freeze the bread. He wanted to have more company, so he sent out his Pottashi too. He said to Pikachu, Glaile, and Pottashi saying " Do you guys thing there's any more regions left to explore?" Pikachu replied in a happy tone "Pikachu!" "I guess that's an A-OK." Ash said.

This was the year in which I actually finished a fanfiction! I wrote a few; PokéWars, Fyre Spin (finished), Hearthome High (finished), Sacred Fyre (short, but finished), and Pirates of Sevii (total flop). Here's an excerpt from a popular fanfiction of mine (Hearthome High);

“I’ve been storing these two babies away for a long time now. I hope it’ll be happy to see me!” Max’s mom said. She held out the ball in her hand and threw out the two balls onto the ground. Two purple Pokemon that had four hands came out. Their hands on their tails were yellow, and the hands they had on their torsos had no fingers.

“Hello, Ambipoms! It’s been a while!” Max’s mom exclaimed. The Ambipoms were smiling, jumping for joy. Max’s mom put her finger over her mouth, telling them to be quiet. They copied her, and the three tiptoed to Max’s room. Max was snoring; unaware his mother entered the room. She bent over, and looked under Max’s bed. There was a box that said, “Do not go in, or else!”

She took out the box, told the Ambipoms to come, and they went downstairs. She went into the eat-in kitchen. The kitchen was not too small, but not too big. It had yellow walls, maple floors, and an Italian look in it. She set the box on the eat-in kitchen table, and opened the box. Three Pokeballs and a diary were in the box, and also something Max’s mom was mad about seeing. It was apparently a belly ring, but she wasn’t exactly sure. She put the ring on top of the steel refrigerator, and took out the balls. She threw the balls in the air, and three Pokemon came out. A slimy, pink snail-like Pokemon, a green and white human-like Pokemon, and a white, furry monkey-like Pokemon. Gastrodon, Kirlia, and Vigoroth. She went to the backyard and gathered her Pokemon who were sleeping under the patio.

I never finished a chaptered fanfiction after 2007. I attempted to write a sequel to Fyre Spin and Sacred Fyre, which happened to be Delphi's Tale, but I didn't finish it. I also began writing, but never finished; Dragonwings, The Cozmos of Dyrk, Rescuers of Land and Sea, Tears of the Forgotten, and A Nobody's Mai. I even wrote a one-shot; The Story of Master ??? and the Deities. Here's an excerpt for the story that had the most potential, Dragonwings;

As time passed, the battle remained at a stalemate. Both sides were equal in power, each having one Pokemon left. There was a girl and a boy on a grassy field, near a cliff that went into the sea, which sparkled like the famous Lapis Garden in the Sevii Islands.

Clair, a girl of fourteen years old, was at a fair height. She had short, blue hair that went down to her neck, and wore a necklace with a red and white ball known as the Poke ball. She wore a worn-out pink-camo t-shirt, and short jeans. Holding the Poke ball in her hands with confidence, she took the ball, and threw it into the air. It opened, and a white light shot out of it, transforming into a blue, worm-like Pokemon with a white underbelly. Smiling, she waited for her cousin’s next move.

Lance, a boy of fifteen years old, was very tall. He had very short red hair. He wore a red t-shirt and pair of black jeans. He also liked wearing a red cape that he put on every time he battled, which, in his eyes, signified strength, courage, and wisdom, even though it was just a blanket he got for his birthday when he was five that a red, lizard Pokemon that had fire on the tip of its tail. He held his Poke ball, and threw his in the air as well, and once again, a white light shot out of the Pokeball, which transformed into a yellow Pokemon that looked like a dragonfly, with green, diamond-shaped wings.

“Dratini, use slam on Vibrava!” Clair ordered, while Lance smiled, thinking of his next move. Dratini lifted its tail, slammed it on the ground, and went flying into the air. It positioned itself going towards Vibrava, then, it shot right down.

Again, no finished fanfictions. The unfinished chaptered fanfictions that I began were called; The PokéBible, Memoirs of an Alakazam, The Aleph Archipelago, House P.C., Cyber Codex, Space-Time Axis I, and a Hearthome High rewrite attempt. And some one-shots; Equilibrium, The Horror of the Ilex Forest, and The Song of Victory. Here's an excerpt from House, P.C.;

“We’re doing two patients again this time, but in separation. I want you to do this one by yourself, with my help. It’s a Meowth that can talk, and you’re a people person, so I want you to handle this one,” House told her. Jo smiled, cocking her head.

“I see you’ve noticed,” Jo replied, winking.

House rolled his eyes. “Oh, please. The closest you’re getting to being anything relatively cute is a Caterpie.”

Jo flashed her teeth. “I’ll take that as a compliment.”

“Whatever. This Meowth had a respiratory arrest yesterday, and was checked in shortly afterward, and put on artificial respiration. Has one reported case of sleep apnea, but other than that, it’s clean. Run some tests, see what you can find.”

Jo bowed her head slightly, and walked out the door. House was getting nervous about what would take place later that day. Kyle would be battling him. So far, House had a Riolu, a Lunatone, and a Gengar. He won the Riolu off of the new game corner near Silph Co, he caught the Gengar at the Pokémon tower, and he caught Lunatone after diagnosing and curing it many patients ago.

I'm attempting (hopefully) to finish a fanfiction I just started. It's called Forever Dawn. Here's an excerpt, but I'm putting spoiler tags on it;

Natu’s new form was very different. Although it was still green, and had the same beak, it had a torso now, and more elliptical eyes. Its wings were no longer stubby, but now longer and freer, and white. Its new torso had more intricate designs upon it, showing a face with two gleaming, red eyes. Its feet were also no longer stubby, but looked less birdlike. One thing was for sure; this was no longer Natu. Natu had evolved.

“Approve of change as it is your fate!” the new Pokémon began again, screaming, “For nighttime will never be late, know that stars will never lend to those that are not their friend. Remember this prophecy’s every line, for it is true and it is mine! Just remember this Xatu’s rhyme; go to a place, a different time!”

Flapping its wings and cackling telepathically, the Xatu began to fly around, as it hit Zakuro, frightened, in the forehead. Zakuro practically flew several feet before hitting the ground on her backside, sliding on the ground. She began to lose consciousness, as the Xatu flew around again, and picked her up by its beak. It began to clip at her ear, blood trickling down and onto her face, as they flew over the forest.

Zakuro, terrified, tried to scream, but as it looked over the forest, even all of her birdlike friends ignored her. She could not be heard. No one could hear her.

The Xatu began to fly lower onto the forest, until Zakuro’s feet began to brush the peak of the forest’s canopy. And like that Xatu dropped Zakuro, to her displeasure, as a blue aura surrounded her. She levitated past trees as she fell at the same speed at which Xatu was flying her, as she flew into a shrine-box with a red roof, which opened its doors as soon as Zakuro saw it.

And like that, Zakuro slowed down. She began to fall gently in a greener light, as the lime green atmosphere began to close in on her. She was about to scream, but the light calmed her. She knew she was falling, but it seemed different to her. As if she were falling up, Zakuro began to shut her eyes. Her ear no longer hurt, as the green light was beginning to heal the ear. Blood no longer dripped from her ear, and like a lullaby, the green light began to tire her.

As of May 2008, I've also started writing original stories. I've thought over 40 original story ideas, and just like my incomplete Pokémon fanfictions, I haven't finished a single story yet, save for one. I'm currently finishing one story I'm writing, but it's difficult.
The Professor of Pokémon Elite 2000.

Last edited by Professor Geoffrey; 02-05-2010 at 09:15 PM.
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Old 02-06-2010, 12:55 AM
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Omigosh! You wrote Danny Phantom fictions? LoL, awesome! That was such an awesome cartoon. xD

Er, I don't know if my writing's improved any, but here's what I got:

First ever fan-fic, back when I was foolish enough to write a Trainer Fic...

Elenora lay on her back throwing a rubber ball against the wall then catching it again. With each passing day she grew more restless and bored. Now she that she was 14 and a half, she was plenty old enough to register for the Pokemon League. Her mother never mentioned it, and her dad always seemed busy. She missed the ball, and it went flying past her head. That’s it, she concluded, I’m leaving. I’ll sneak out and look for Jake. Maybe he’ll get me registered. She hopped up and grabbed her bag, packing some of the necessities for her trip. She figured Jake would be in Pewter City up to the North, about a 3 hr. hike through grass and forest. She would have to avoid the wild Pokemon that would often pop out and attack travelers if they weren’t careful. Elenora also planned to buy some Poke Balls at the Mart at Veridian with her 3000 Poke Dollars. With some luck, she could catch some wild Pkmn.

Elenora grabbed her cap and snuck quietly down the stairs into the kitchen. Her mother wasn’t anywhere to be seen, luckily. Rummaging through the cabinets, Elenora collected food items such as granola bars, cereal, bread, and a canteen of water. As she was stuffing them into her bag, her mother, Rosalyn, unexpectedly strode into the kitchen holding a magazine. Elenora hid her bag as she looked up.

“Elenora! I’ve been looking for you!”

“I was just in my room, and . . . uh . . . came down for a drink.”

“Why do you have your cap on? And is that your bag?”

“Uh . . . no . . . ” An uncomfortable silence ensued.

“Well, anyway,” Rosalyn continued slowly and suspiciously, “your dad called and said that Professor Oak was looking for you. You’d better go see what he wants. I’ll talk to you later, then.”

“Oh, okay!” Elenora slipped out of the kitchen and out of the house. The house had a nice view of the ocean on a hill rising above the treetops. Somewhere over the ocean was Cinnabar Island, where there was a Gym. She’d have to travel there at some point in her journey.

Pallet didn’t have a Gym. The highlight or the town was Professor Oak’s Pokemon Research Lab, which is where Elenora headed to. As she ran up the stairs, she wondered what the professor wanted from her. Usually if Oak wanted something done, either he’d do it himself or send one of his many assistants to get the job done.

As usual, the lab was a buzzing with busy scientists. Some ran past with piles of papers or laboratory equipment, and many were either working at a computer or working some complicated formulas. A few were observing a Pikachu who was pumping electricity into a lightbulb, while others were taking notes on a young Ratatatta.

Professor Oak was no where to be seen, but his grandson Ben was. He was standing beside a large machine seeming ever the same with a condescending scowl on his face. He payed no attention to Elenora as she came up to him.

“Excuse me,” Ben was trying to catch someone’s attention, but everyone seemed to busy. “Excuse me! Hello!!!” He tapped a scientist’s shoulder as he walked by.

“Not right now, Ben! I’m on the verge of a new scientific discovery!”

“Right, and I’m on the verge of impatience!”

“That’s nice . . ., ”the scientist mumbled as he dropped some fluid into a beaker.

“Ugh!” Ben twisted around. “I just want to know where the Professor is.”

“Is Oak not here, Ben?” Elenora asked him.

“Well, apparently not! What do you want with him?”

“Hey, he said he wanted to see me for something or other.”

“Hmpf! What would he want with you?!” Ben sharply turned his back on Elenora, tapping his foot impatiently. Grumpy, Elenora thought to herself. What a jerk! She left Ben to his rage to look for her dad.

First Chapter of my older, abandoned Fic I wrote a while back. It was going to be a Shadow Pokemon story

The match was a close one. The challenger had only single Pokémon left, while the opposing had two, though the one, a Nuzleaf, was pretty banged up. That gave the challenger a little hope, but the opposing Breloom was fresh from the Pokéball. The crowd around the battle was going wild. The red corner was a very popular trainer, but the blue corner challenger was stronger than they expected.

With smug confidence, the challenger sent out his last Pokémon. The crowd cheered even loader as the new contestant, a Charmeleon, reared its head and roared. The Breloom was a little intimidated by the fire-type, but put on a fighting face. The Charmeleon moved first, using a small Ember move on the Nuzleaf. That proved too much for the grass-type, and it fainted.

The Breloom moved next, charging towards the foe for a Headbutt Attack. Charmeleon was sent sprawling, but it quickly recovered. Annoyed, it growled back. The Breloom became uneasy, but went for a Mach Punch. Before that could land, the Charmeleon breathed out flames, creating a Fire Spin. The Breloom was sucked up by the fire tornado. It struggled against it, then using its powerful legs it pushed off the ground and jumped out of the weakening tornado.

It didn’t escape unscathed, however. Fire Spin had inflicted a burn on it. Wincing from the pain, the Breloom didn’t see Charmeleon prepare another attack. It used Flamethrower, toasting the unsuspecting mushroom black and causing it to faint.

The Challenger had won easily. The crowd cheered, chanting the red corner’s name over and over.
“Ko-dee! Ko-dee! Kod-”


“-ee! Kodee!” someone was shaking him awake. “Wake up, for Pete’s sake!”
Kody moaned, but kept his eyes sealed shut. Why would someone wake him up from such a wonderful dream?

“Kody,” the person said annoyed. “Wake up or you’ll be fired!”

Kody jumped awake, looking around bewildered and confused. He was just at a Coliseum. How did he end up in a store? His mother and boss stared angrily at him, and then turned to a customer in front of the cash register.

“I apologize, ma’am,” she said, “What can I help you with?”

Kody yawned and stretched, his memory slowly coming back to him. He was at work in his parent’s souvenir shop. He was supposed to be working the register today, yet the store wasn’t too busy. He hadn’t thought it would hurt just to rest for a moment, but apparently he had dozed off. Looking to the base of his chair, there was a small Pokémon contently napping. Kody nudged the Riolu gently with his shoe. It slowly awoke, and then looked up at Kody.

“Hey, Toru,” Kody said to it. “You were supposed to keep me awake.”

“Royga,” Toru apologized as he yawned.

Kody laughed. “You have got to be the world’s laziest Riolu.”

Kody’s mother, Sharon, finished helping the customer, but then turned back to scold her son.
“We may live in Poketopia,” she began, “but that doesn’t give you the right to stay up all night to watching or battling in the Coliseums. You have other responsibilities, such as school and work. That customer was standing there for five minutes trying to wake you up!”

“I’m sorry,” Kody began, “but-”

“Life doesn’t revolve around battling, Kody. You should be thinking about your future. Someone has to keep this place running, and that someone will be you.”


“Listen: no visiting the Coliseums without permission, especially the late night ones. And no more falling asleep at work, okay, hijo?”


“Ah! No buts about it. Now I need you to go in the back and bring out some more of these Pokétopia badges. They fly right off the shelves!” She handed him a slip of paper with numbers on it.
Kody gave up, knowing he had lost. Toru followed him into the back room where shipments of all kinds of souvenirs were stacked and stored until they were unpackaged and brought out front. Boxes stood upon boxes on strong shelving units that reached high to the ceiling.

“This isn’t fair!” Kody sighed. “‘No late-night Coliseums! What does she think I am, a toddler?”

“Royga,” Toru pointed out.

“Well, yes I did fall asleep,” Kody admitted sheepishly, “but that was a onetime thing.”

“Royga, Royga.”

“Okay, maybe I’ve fallen asleep once or twice...”


“Three or...”

“Royga, Royga.”

“Five times is all... But I won’t do it again.”

“Gaaaa, Royga.”

“You’re not helping...” Kody looked back at the slip that held random numbers. They were meant to be more like an address telling him where the stocked item was in the back room, but numbers just weren’t his strong point. These particular items he was looking for was located at the far back wall close to the shipment doors. He looked back up to check where he was at now.

“I need to go farther back. Come on, Toru. This place gives me the creeps,” He shivered, walking on. It was always cold here, even when it was sweltering outside.

“Rrrr-rrr,” Toru agreed, trilling his cry.

“I-,” Kody was about to say, but then there was a load crash nearby. Kody paused, more than a little startled, but then ran off towards the source of the sound. Before he could turn the corner, a shadowy figure nearly ran him over. The intruder was as surprised as Kody was, but quickly recovered and pushed the boy aside, running for the emergency fire-exit.

“Hey! S-stop right there!” Kody yelled after him. Or her. Whatever it was, it was getting away. Kody took off after it without much thought. Perhaps he should have looked for help, but Kody tended to take matters into his own matters.

The thief was quick. Kody had a hard time keeping up with him as they ran through a maze of storage units and boxes. The whole time he couldn’t get a good look at the intruder. The boy knew the intruder was clothed in black, shadowed by a big hat, but the lighting there never was very good.

He rounded a corner just as the thief tipped over a large box of stuffed Pokémon. The toys went all over, burying Kody and Toru in their overflow. When they managed to dig their way out, there was no sign of the shadowy thief.

“Shoot!” Kody exclaimed, kicking toys out of his ay. “I’m so stupid! How could I let him get away like that? Argh!”

Toru popped his head out from the wreckage, knocking into an small object and sending it skidding across the floor where it bumped Kody‘s shoe. He reached down and scooped it off the ground. It was an oval black badge with elongated ‘P’ and ‘H’ on it.

“Who was that anyway?”Kody stared off down the aisle.
Then there's my current fics, Lunar Destinies and Purified, which you can access through the link provided in my signature. ^^

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Old 03-27-2010, 01:27 AM
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Well ive only been writing since 2009 so its not really that evolved. But my 2010 is a lot better than 2009.

This is from my old death note fan fic which died.

''Hey zeke wait up for me'' exclamed katie. she was wearing a red dress with highheels.''What is it katie'' asked zeke. he was wearing a blue tshirt blue jeans and tene shoes.''I just anted to ask you to the dance zeke'' replyed katie nervosly.''Kay'' said zeke.''Yes yes'' yelled katie.''Hm maybe zeke is the one that needs my death note to save the world altough every other deathgod wants to see the human race is extermanated'' ryuzaki said in his mind. Ryuzaki was wering a black skin suite blue skin for face hands and feet.At the dance.''A book fell through the window weird'' wipered zeke. Zeke picked up the book.''Every one report to your houses the dance is over'' exclamed the princaple.'' Hi its zeke isnt it'' asked ryuzaki.''Yes it is now tell me what this weird book does'' asked and awnserd zeke.''Write some ones name and think of their face while their your writing their name and they will DIE'' awnsered ryuzaki. ''Well i'll write the thief izaki motmu'' said zeke. Fourty seconds later.''zzz the theif izaki motmu has died of a heart attack zzz'' yelled the tv store tv.''Well do you belive me now zeke cause if you dont make some one get run over or shot or something cause im telling the truth'' said ryuzaki.''I belvie you ryuzki'' exclamed zeke.''Zeke you didnt walk me home after the dance'' sadly exclamed katie.''Oh yeah sorry i forgot ater finding this book katie sorry'' guiltely said zeke.''Well you can make it up by gooing to golden coral with me zeke'' exclamed katie.''Kay katie'' exclamed zeke. At golden coral.'' So katie what do you want to do after this'' asked zeke.''How bout the amusement park carosal'' asked katie.''Okay katie'' awnsered zeke. After the date.''hey zeke how about a goodnight kiss'' asked katie.''okay katie''n awnsered zeke.When zeke got home.''So zeke who are you gooing to kill'' asked ryuzaki.''No one ryuzaki'' exclamed zeke.''Ah thats no fun zeke'' sadly pouted ryuzaki.''Well ryuzaki lets talk more about what the death note does'' exclamed zeke.''Well only 6 death notes will work in the human world at a time any more will just be normal books untill something happened to the 6th death note then the 7th deathnote will get powers.Also it wont work if you have only a name you need both a name and a face for it to work.Now lets talk about you zeke asked and awnsered ryuzaki.''well then i am a college student gooing to the art insutite to become a cartoonist.So thats all about me ryuzaki. awnsered zeke.At katies house.''Whats this book hm weird symbols but inside it says deathnote i think i heard zeke say something about finding a book called a deathnote also'' exclamed katie.''Then what do you know about the deathnote girl'' exclamed a mysterious figure.'' nothing and who are you'' katie exclamed in fear.''My name is gail and thats too bad but youll learn all about the deathnote katie'' exclamed gail.

2010 (will hopefully become better later on xD)
its from my the bite fic. its still a WIP

Chapter 4 can he control it?
When they woke up the next morning they all headed out to school only to meet someone that they really did not want to see. Just then john started growling at a person and Nathan was starting to get nervous. “Is that the man that transformed you into a werewolf?” Nathan asked. “Yes it is now stand back and leave it to me!” John Yelled.

“Heh I see you still remember me boy.” The man who turned John into a werewolf said. “Its hard to forget one of the people who ruined my life’s face!” John yelled at the top of his lungs. “Hmm well then I guess I just have to make it up to you and teach you how to control the beast!” The man yelled. Then John looked at Nathan and they both shook there heads in agreement.

“Fine you got a deal!” John yelled. Then the man led John to a dark alleyway where he told him to wait. Then he got Nathan and turned into a wolf as if he was going to kill Nathan. He then started charging in to him hoping that the right feeling was happening to John. “No I must save Nathan!” John yelled as he turned into a wolf.

After John transformed he went in and jumped in the way of Nathan blocking the attack. “I cant believe you your such a traitor!” John yelled as a wolf. The man starts laughing. “Heh no I didn’t you see if you feel enough for someone about to die you can gain control of your powers forever.” The man said while still laughing. “So you mean that all this was a test!” John yelled at the top of his lounges.

“Yea pretty much.” The man exclaimed still laughing. “And just so you know my name is Richard.” “Well um I guess this is good bye Richard.” John said wearily. “No its only the beginning.” Richard exclaimed. “Wait what does that mean!?!” John asked as he yelled it. “Lets just say that there will be a tournament with all kinds of people in it.” Richard exclaimed while laughing.

“Does that mean that there will be a tournament with people fighting and im suppose to take part in it?!?!” John yelled. “Yes you will and some of the people you call friends too.” Richard said. “Well when’s my first fight?” john asked. “Just wait twelve days then go to the old cemetery.” Richard exclaimed in a dark and evil tone as if he was up to something.

After eleven days of training john finally learned how to control his werewolf form. So the next day him and Lucas went to the old cemetery without Nathan. “Well well here we are. Are we ready to fight?” Asked a woman who looked as if she had red hair and a dark red lipstick. She also looked as if her eyes were red. And she was about five foot five.

“Yes but what exactly are you? If you want to know about me im just a werewolf.” John asked. “Vell you see im a vampire named Victoria and you are John Diamond.” Victoria answered in an accent. “Well im ready to fight now..” Said John in a depressed tone. “Vait just incase something goes wrong in the future here’s my cell number. 678-982-4817.” Victoria exclaimed. “And here’s mine. 678-384-2934.”

John said as he went along with what she was saying. After that John transformed into wolf and went in to strike Victoria down. But she tried biting John and he backed down. So then she went in to bite him again but it wasn’t working. Because he was so fast he could dodge out of her way before she even close to him.

“Well I don’t think anyone will win now.” Richard said appearing out of nowhere. “You see im a Procter as well as a contestant and well I say that this match ends in a draw. Victoria you need to go to the old air plane factory in a week. John you need to come here again tomorrow.” “Fine Richard I’ll come back tomorrow.” John said as if he was depressed again.
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Old 03-01-2011, 05:18 AM
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I just want to say that beyond what you think yourself 'better' is all in the end, a matter of taste (beyond things like spelling).
I can't say I've become 'better' so much as I feel like the voice I use in my fanfics is much now.
I'm long past (finally) that odd need to make my writing 'better' for the sake of what other people view is good writing in this or any other fandom.
In place of it, I write what I would like to read. While I do read the classic novels, my taste is actually naturally light on details, making the reader have to use their imaginations a bit more, and heavy on things like playful (but not random) dialogue that makes a reader think...
In my writing history online since 1998 I have written for Sailor Moon, Peter Pan, Labyrinth, Cats, Pokémon, Unico, Harry Potter, Cat Returns, Fraggle Rock, and Powerpuff Girls (for oldest to newest going by my
I'll let my writing speak for itself and you can be the judge if it is any 'better'. I half think I've gotten worst...


Listen to the slow breath of the many worlds,

Their dreams united as one in an everlasting song

Hear them and please don't cry any more little maiden

You are never alone with your dream as a guide

For it shines like a beacon of a million stars in the midnight wind

I will always be here for you

as long as your soft light of hope illuminates the universe...
2001-Laby one shots
How silly of me..I must have been dreaming" She spoke alound and turned over, hanging onto sleep. But it was too quiet suddenly..much too quiet..

Why wasn't Toby crying? Sarah sat bolt upright in her bed and tiptoed down the hall. With each step she noticed that the pressure of her feet left clear spots in a thick coat of dust covering the floor.

How did it get so dirty all of a sudden? She wondered, and cleared a spider web out of doorway of her parents room.

"Toby..." Sarah started before she looked into the crib and her heart sank.

The inside of the baby's crib was laced with spider webs and dust around the pillows and if no living had touched it in ages...

Toby was gone!

"It wasn't a dream..Jareth kept him.." Sarah whispered though a wave of tears.
2002-That one Pokemon AU

She hadn't been looking for trouble, but it seemed it had found her. A raging inferno of red and blue grew out of the forest undergrowth, masking the life giving afternoon sun.
She drew her single fragile leaf over her eyes and screamed, one hardly intelligible word born of fear.


The scream went unheard, and cowering down into the brown earth, Chikorita waited for the end.
When it did not come as quickly as she had feared she crinkled her eyes shut harder still and began to regret all the things which she had never done in her life.
I never told Sunspot I loved him..oh, did he ever even know?..I never saw the world beyond on the must be so beautiful...I never had an egg of my own...I never learned Giga Drain..I..
By the time she got to missing her great uncle Laceleaf's hundredth hatching day Chikorita was more than a bit puzzled.
What's taking so long? The least the gods could do is make my death quick and painless.
She opened her bright ruby eyes and looked ahead at the flames, mustering in up all the courage she could find within. But her voice was only it's usual soft chirp edged with defiance.

"Gods, take me if you want, but please don't give me time to regret!"
2003-CATS one shots
"What are you going to name them?" Tantomile asked

I thought for a moment.

To be known as a true Jellicle kittens must be named within an hour of their birth.

A name worthy of a cat's honor must be picked, one that had never belonged to another before.

So, the naming of kittens is very important, and not to be taken lightly off the top of the head, as humans often do.
2005-That one Harry Potter fic
Which was a good thing, as whatever mask of dignity Snape had ever presented to the world before this moment had been stripped away by his now impatiently hopping up and down and the making grabby 'give it here' motions with his hands.

Rolanda reached under her seat, hastily lifting the concealment charm she had cast on a dusty old brown paper bag.

"Here Severus, he is rightfully yours..." She said handing it over.

Severus Snape , thirty-three, potions teacher, ripped into the paper with all the crazed delight of a five year old on Christmas morning.


The bright pink stuffed bunny, as bright pink stuffed bunnies go, was a sight to behold.

He had blue button eyes and neon pink stitching for his eyes and mouth, while the inside of his ears and the length of his underbelly was lined with fabric featuring coo-coo trains that even now chugged along merrily. It was all topped off with a lime green cotton puff tail.

To Snape it was one of the most beautiful things he had seen in years.

Mr. Aliwishus was definitely someone he could see himself being honestly in love for...

And so they say, that Professor Snape's heart grew three sizes that day.
05/2006- Also The year of my 25,000 word Nanowrimo, and Fable

To say it was odd to what the average modern day viewer thinks of as art was an understatement.

A creature with eyes made of clear cut glass, at times shining a robins egg blue and at others a pure golden amber, the porcelain figure was indeed a cat.

But while every cat ever seen in reality had a

habit of walking about on all fours, this one stood proud and stance as any man, dressed in an all white suit and holding a cane in a very gentleman like fashion.

Even his white top hat gave his orange and yellow patterned face the very air of one who looked well respected.

Respected by whom?

To Rachel, lost in the awe of getting a brand new 'toy' it was the best $40 American dollars she could ever remember spending.

"Nice to meet you." She said with the polite air of someone that had long ago disconcerted herself with how silly talking to items of her collection when she was alone was.

Much more sanity in the long run she figured, than all the therapy acquiring an actual human roommate would ever cause.

Rachel lifted the figure gingerly from the box, carrying it with one swift flowing movement towards her bedroom and promptly tripping over her discarded backpack.

Mumbling, but sighing with thankfulness to find her newest possession unharmed, she continued her short path.

People talked about that word all the time to describe why Sceptile winter in the south of Shino , or how Goldeen knew where to return to the exact streams of their birth to lay their eggs. It's often suggested that human beings in their lofty evolutionary position at the top of the chain are somehow beyond the reach of inborn instinct.

To whatever amount of humanity I had misplaced in exchange for my becoming partly Zubat I now felt strangely grateful, as that invisible hand that drew me westward continued on in a low hum. The call was painfully weak, like the nagging memory of a door left ajar to a dearest treasure.

Nathan, oddly enough, for his love of explaining, had never bothered to tell me his address, yet here I was making an ambling beeline in a seemingly random direction that just seemed right.

It drew me ever on, promising a warm comfort that I remembered so vividly while cradled in his arms...

It sounded so foolish and overdramatic to my conscious mind, like a half-plotted romance novel complete with unrealistic overprotective parents and hundred-year-long feuds... but on some level closer to my heart, it seemed that I had been without his reassurance for weeks rather than days.

The dirt roads near my apartment complex soon gave way to the paved, rock-lined sidewalk of Pewter City as I stopped for a minute to catch my breath. I had been jogging more so than walking all this time without noticing it.

The smell of the city, heavy with the energy and breath of so many people, and its signature Pokémon types mix of sulfur and gravel ash, left a burning feeling of soreness upon the roof of my mouth, akin to the feline urine incident from yesterday. Closing my mouth and breathing deeply through my nose instead seemed to help, if only a little bit.

The nearly undetectable sound of soft paws that had been trailing me for the last two hours or so stopped short just outside of my line of sight. The sound seemed to carry with it a feeling of guilt, if that was even possible.

"Nickel, I thought I told you to not follow me. Go on now, off to Mom and Daddy's house, you still know the way."
The silence behind me, I could tell from experience, listened with pricked ears.
(More to come, I think this is an interesting idea, to put all these years up together like this)
*Is 28 now*

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Old 03-01-2011, 05:35 AM
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2008- 2009-and sometimes now The years of Fraggle fic

The common hole in the wall seemed especially everyday that morning.

A ray of sunlight traced its path from the dim singing purple tunnel out to the spacious work room of a just as common old fashion Arizona home.

The old grey and white sheepdog lay in his sleeping basket wagging his tail this particular morning, transfixed with the little brown and cream colored fluff of a puppy chasing after a ball two times it's size.

It finally caught it, and growling, tried to climb up onto the top of the shiny red sphere.

Sprocket gasped, putting out a paw to gently keep his daughter from falling, and perching her in a full belly flop on top of the toy.

Doc, who had been observing all this time as well, laughed over the edge of his newspaper at the puppy's little yap of victory.

"Well Sprocky, I guess it really won't be too much trouble keeping just one of the puppies. I'm glad you talked me into it..."

In the background, the poor little bit of fur could now be seen rolling over and over with the ball, clinging helplessly to it before he father stopped the cycle with a finger.

The puppy slowly oozed off the ball, collapsing drunkenly into the depths of the dog basket.

"Yes sir-re, Cassette reminds me of you at that age, Sprocket."

The old inventor reached down on a knee to pat his faithful pet.

"Of course, just because something new comes along to love doesn't mean that someone old you love means any less. We've just got to take this life as it comes, together! Right Sprocky?"

Sprocket barked and nodded in agreement, as suddenly a set of tiny voices broke up the man and his dog moment.

"Rope?" A serious voice asked.

"Check!" A energetic female voice replied.

"Compass?" The voice asked again.

"Checkahroonie!" An even more hyper voice added in, it's comment ending with the unmistakable sound of bone hitting metal. "Ow…"

"Doohickey and thingamabob?" The voice finished.

"Those are the first two things I packed!" The girl's voice grumbled.
Page number fifty-seven. Wonderful, wonderful, glorious page number fifty-seven.

The stress lines upon the side of the small, thinly leather-bound pocket size book spine told the tale of how many generations of fraggle females had been taken in by the unbridled lust of that page more than any storyteller ever could.

Not that the current storyteller, who was at page number fifty six and giggling loudly , would not have been happy to try if asked.

But of course, like many unspoken parts of fraggle culture, the juicer plot points of the ending from Furlined Passions was hardly thought of as silly or serious enough to be talked about in polite company.

The storyteller wiggled her feet happily where she lay on her stomach, still in bed in her living cave adjoining the main storytelling chamber at half pass lunch time.

Her breath caught in her throat as she leaded in with an intense gaze, turning the page quickly to the fabled paragraphs when...

"Harriet! Harriet! Are you home? I've come concerning a matter of great importance to fraggle kind!"

The strong resounding tones of a young male fraggles voice mixed with the words she had just been reading made her pale yellow form nearly jump two feet in the air and melt at the same time, a sudden ability that ended with Harriet laying sprawled among the piles of books on her bedside floor.

"Yes, I am! Just a moment!" She called to the voice and knock beyond her door.

She tucked the moon and star embossed cover with the shadows of a windswept princess and dashing prince under a dusty respectable looking copy of Cavemoss and You: A Match Made In Dampness and made her way to the main cave.

It looked smaller than it truly was, barely big enough for a shell-less hermit. Harriet tisk-tisked herself silently for not making her place of work more respectable looking lately.

Most of all, of course, when it was about to be seen by HIM.

She ran a hand though her wild frizzy mop of pink hair self consciously, opening the door with much flair a moment later.

"Come in, come in! So sorry to keep you waiting! I was valued lore for the Eternal Anthologies..."

"Ah, well then, I won't take up too much of your time." The sandy colored fraggle said, walking into the cave with a wide well practiced stride.

"Oh, you're more welcome to all my time if you need anything, anything at all Matt..."

Harriet laughed, shadowing him silently as soon as she closed the door behind him.
Uncle Matt stared at the paper, willing the right words to jump from his inked quill in the right order and onto the blank expanse before him. So far he was not having much luck.

"All right Matthew," He whispered to himself. "You can do this, you're brave, smart, you have an superb vocabulary..Now, once more…"

The tan fraggle was just about to put feather to paper when the sound of an almost awake snore and grumble from the bed to his side made him freeze, cupping a hand around his work with a guilty glance.

When the room fell into silence he melted back into a clam writing position where he sat , his hand working with a quick burst of inspiration:

Dear Nephew Gobo,

I'm sure you remember that today is the day I shall be venturing out into Outer Space and leaving Fraggle Rock for places unknown. By the time you read this I will surely be many miles away on a grand adventure, but I don't want you to worry. You can always be sure that no matter how far we are from each other your old uncle loves you very much.

You are a big boy now Gobo and I am very proud of you, that is why I think it is only right that now should be the time I tell you…

His hand began to shake, forcing him to hold it steady with the other to stop the small trembles.

…That is…Remember how I always told you that my little brother, your father, Bezel and your sweet mother, Miara were lost to a most regrettable cave in? Well that was..that isn't…I never meant to say…

"Gobo's Uncle Matt! Gobo's Uncle Matt?" A voice yelled at the top of it's gravely sounding lungs, causing the writers' blocked fraggle to jerk bolt upright, knocking a whole hollow gourds' worth of ink onto the floor. "Are you awake?"

"Yes I am Marlon, but why in the rock are you up so late?"

Matt half turned to see the short red haired yellow fraggle trot into the room at his normal frenzied pace, his one smaller swinted eye glinting brightly.

" night..It's good for thinking…" Marlon replied, laughing over his uneven breathing.

"Well, be that as it may " Matt began, trying in vain to follow the energy filled furry body as he zipped around, poking and sniffing in all the nooks of the two beds. "…you really should…" He sighed in exasperation. .what is it you want?"

Marlon looked up for where his hand was hanging greedily over Gobo's hat collection on the wall, zipping back to the mustached fraggles' side.

"I want lots of things, millions of things..but I wanted to ask you a question…" Marlon hissed, drawing uncomfortably near.

"Alright, but be quick about it," Matt edged away, clearing his throat. "I leave within the hour."

"This Outer Space..are you sure it doesn't need a…" Marlon began hopefully, dusting the explorers' already clean jacket shoulder.

"A king? Marlon as I've said a'gain and a'gain, if I come to know of any such job openings I will be sure to tell you first of all." He ended with a sigh, sitting back down to his writing as if forgetting the visitors existence right away.
2009-to Now-Many Powerpuff fics

"That day." was all that the human race could ever think to call it.

In more than a hundred countries, in over twenty languages, even the most learned of literary figures had lost all of their gifts for fancier titling. For a day, a single day, had left its mark on the world...a mark felt no more deeply than in the City of Townsville.

The deep crater that once was the famous Townsville Volcano bubbled within its manmade circular steel dam, the complex pumping system that Utonium Industries had constructed lending a contented hum to Townville Park.

The lava emanated a peaceful orange glow to match the approaching sunset, contrasting sharply with the few patches of green grass that were just now regrowing over the blackened patch of earth.

Two months ago, this place would have been full of citizens enjoying a lazy Saturday with a last game of Frisbee and cheerful greetings.

But now, somehow, even the ground itself seemed to mourn the lost of those that had done it the most good... and the most destruction.

A group that was now just a memory to all that have seen that day...A group called the Powerpuff girls.

By all accounts, a certain member of that far away memory should had been with her sisters...It was a shame, then, that Buttercup was officially dead.
" It is pretty here... b ..but the Professor doesn't like us leaving the US without telling him fir..."

"All the more reason for you to be here, you couldn't be safer or more fashionable than when you're with me..."

Him's yellow gaze traveled down to where Bubbles' feet had just touched earth again with a disapproving snort.

"I still can't believe you never learned!"

Bubbles had to admit they were lovely low cut boots, twice as good as any she had seen in magazines. Their soft brushed leather, dyed a vivid periwinkle blue, spoke of a quality that made her long to put aside the uneasy question of just what type of skin it had been in life. Their heels on the other hand...

"Well, a little, but flying is so much faster, and we never had a mom,"

Bubbles a took quick, choppy line of tiny steps forward, her nervous pause at its end nearly tugging her other foot free of its shoe all together.

"...and the Professor has this weird green-brown allergic reaction to..."

Him stepped forward bit by bit, pausing for a breath as Bubbles flailed in fear of falling over, only to be saved at the last moment by the side of the demon's waist as he sifted it nonchalantly to the side.

"That's why you have mee! Now the most important thing about walking in heeels is to move with conviction, they aren't at all forgiving." Him said, swiftly lifting the powerpuffs' light frame with both claws and redepositing her on his other side facing the opposite direction. "Yoour every move has to oooze confidence, to scream to the world "I am woman hear me roar!"

Bubbles nodded, trying her best to answer the push from behind with all her memories of how the fashion models on tv walked with a hopping sway. Unfortunately her best only lasted a minute before landing her in a tangled heap.. that somehow included the long length of her new coat and a fire hydrant.

"It's "I am woman hear me roar"; not "I am woman, see me fall and mew pathetically" kitten." Him said with a quince, lifting her up by the elbows and cutting the offending leather. "Oppsy daisy!"
and last, a section of my newest chapter of my newest fic, written this month...
The overturned head of a gutted robot was never a good place for a tea party.

It was lucky, then, that what marked the end of the world was closer to never, and with the disappearance of the Powerpuff Girls and Him's unborn heir to doom, that 'never' looked to be getting nearer with every passing minute.

Ruined buildings had long since given up what inner safety their burning mountains of glass and plaster once offered, ending in the loudest whispered war cry of 'pickles' in human history, and a mob of most of the Townsville citizenship, led by the Mayor, running to the relive safety of a cucumber field in nearby Farmsville four hours ago.

"Why do I even bother? All you boys ever see me as is a pretty face with all the right attachments. It's not like I would have anything valuable to say you'd ever be interested in. Fine, go ahead, get yourself and everyone here killed."

Sedusa sipped her tea loudly from a half broken cup as a new bombardment of explosive chemical fall out baked the already long cratered earth.

The commotion ended for a breath, dotted by the loud screeches of something very like a monkey who had long since given up words for unbridled rage.

A white cat, it's long persian fur smoldering on one cheek , padded into the relative safety of dented metal and live wires, sitting down across for the villainess.

"One please." It said in a cultured accent.

The smoking trail of black fur and bruised ego sailing across the sky just then couldn't help but spy the almost too happy sight of White Cat, tucking himself into a ball and licking drops of tea from a saucer perched on Sedusa's lap.

"That is it! Yes, that is the very last straw! That is not to say that previously I did not have ownership of numerous straws as straws are of the cheap variety and thus, made of materials such as plastic.

But to say, as straws are symbolic of that which mentally I..."

Mojo limped sadly into view, two of the demonic gremlins chewing on the torn remains of his blowing white cape.

"White isn't really your color, is it monkey?" Ursula remarked, drifting by with a yawn as the half baked survivors of a gutted pet shop caught her eye.

Mojo stole the opportunity to creep away as bright green beams poured from the black sack the girl carried, the waves of power sending her green dress fluttering.

Row upon row of once peacefully terrified rabbits, birds, and fluffy animals of unmeasurable cuteness suddenly grew pointed teeth and red glowing eyes.

"Perhaps I was a bit hasty in the saying of the shouting which I impolitely subjected you to."

Mojo yelped as a small herd of demonic hamsters streamed by, grabbing his ankles in a flash of fuzzy bloodlust.

"Go on." Sedusa hummed, sticking up her nose and giving the White Cat a gentle petting where he had now settled on her lap.

Mojo growled digging his fingers and the side of his open mouth into the blistering earth where he came into view again, barely holding out against the tiny balls of fur working together to chew at his torso.

"It is said in hard times," He kicked a foot, only to be met with a fresh screech as one ran down his boot.

"...times in which difficulties may be difficult to overcome,"

Mojo growled in surprise as what looked like a cockatiel with ruby clouded eyes landed on his one steady hand, talons sharp and purposeful.

"-that the enemy of the enemy one wishes to..."

Mojo screeched, a loud ring and smoke cloud sending the deadly animals scurrying to the wind.

Sedusa slid a silver trimmed pistol back into her grader belt along with the trace of a smile.

"I could try to help. I like living well enough."
Like I said I will let you be the judge if I've gotten better in the end. Sometimes I feel I have and the next moment I'm not as sure
*Is 28 now*

My *Fanfics*Blog* Art
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Old 03-01-2011, 06:24 AM
Teddiursa of the Sky's Avatar
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Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Terseland.
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Default Re: The Evolution of YOUR Writing

My writing has evolved a lot over a year. Some of which have been completely forgotten and have found themselves at the back of both fan fiction lists. I went from nothing but dialogue to brief descriptions, to my modern works where I am scrambling and eager to find a place where I can describe what is occurring.

Most people would consider Ender an experienced trainer. He had powerful Pokémon, had the badge that proved he had beaten the Jhoto Pokémon league and even has some experience in the land of Ordo. It could be said that Ender was responsible. However, his journey didn’t start like many other trainers. He got two Pokémon at almost the same time.
As he was going to Professor Oaks lab to get his first Pokémon one year after Ash he got a Squirtle. Right as he left the facility he bumped into a Pikachu. After a long battle Ender got a Pikachu. With these Pokémon he captured a Geodude, Tailow, and Roserade.
Now Ender has a task that he has taken from Professor Cottonwood. What is his mission? His mission is to wait for two trainers that are rather late.
“What is taking them so long? I am seriously wondering if he is always late like this… I hear he was even late getting his first Pokémon...”
*On the a ship*
Everybody! Thumbs up for the one description that lets you know everything!

Yeeeeaaaah... To this:
"Well, I believe I have already seen much of it, but I guess it couldn't hurt to see it again."

"Okay, let's go in," Asuna replied.

When they arrived to see the same students from earlier line up, they sat down next to two other students. Nodoka and Yue. Nodoka was relaxed when sitting on the chair.

"Why are we here anyway, I would rather be reading to be honest," mumbled Yue to Nodoka.

"Well, I just figured that I would watch them dance. It is so interesting, and we never do anything like this."

"Hay, bookworm!" called out Asuna as she sat down next to Yue. Negi came to sit down next to Nodoka when she started to tremble. She blushed so uncontrollably that she had to use her hands to cover up it up. Her hair covered her eyes that had shifted to meet Negi.

"Hello, Nodoka. How are you doing this evening," greeted Negi cheerfully.

"'Evening..." replied Nodoka quietly. She was trembling even more, so Yue held her hand without Negi knowing. Nodoka calmed down to a certain extent, but to her it still felt like her heart was racing a thousand miles. The music was playing and the girls dancing, which drew all their attention to now. The boy on the far left however, refused to dance. Rather, he just stood there with his hands in his pockets. This picture attracted Negi's attention though. Why?

In the middle of the song, one of the girls reached over and turned off the music player. A small reverb of the song echoed throughout the gymnasium, but after that, it was immediate silence. All the girls turned to face the boy, but one in particular looked rather angry. Luckily, it was none of the class 2-A students. But as the young boy noticed all of them glaring at him, he let out a small yell and backed up a little. His eyes began to weld up in tears as he walked off the stage. He looked away from Asuna, Negi, Nodoka, and Yue as he passed by. The sound of the door squeaking open and then slowly slamming shut could be heard. The boy did not run out, rather he simply walked. Strange, Negi would definitely talk to this boy tomorrow.
I'd like to take all the credit, but to be honest, I think I would have to thank the many people who helped me along! Thanks NeoPikachu, Giratina, Khajmer, and the rest!
Latest Test/Work in Production:

Last edited by Teddiursa of the Sky; 03-01-2011 at 03:42 PM.
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