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Creative Writing Share your fan fiction, stories, poems, essays, editorials, song lyrics, or any other related written work. All written must be your creation. Start a new thread, and keep replying to that thread as you add on more chapters. Anyone can join in at anytime.


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  #1  
Old 11-18-2010, 07:30 AM
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Default Howling in the Shadows [PG]

Howling in the Shadows

Hiya! 8D This is a new story of mine, Howling in the Shadows, or Howling for short. I don't do blurbs for the purpose of spoilers. Sorry. xD I'll do a picture later.


NOTES:

#1 This story may contain words like: "damn", "hell", ('what the hell' kinda thing), "arse" (yes, the Aussie, Canadian or UK version xD) and "bloody". There might be heavier words, but not too heavy, and they'll be bleeped out with asterisks. There would only be swearing for the sole reason of a character's personality.

#2 I don't capitalise the first letter of pokémon species names and the word 'pokémon' because I see it from the same point of view as Scy...how they're nouns, not proper nouns, and it makes no sense for them to be capitalised. You don't capitalise animal species names!

#3 It takes a lot of inspiration and motivation to write chapters, and they may take a long time. +_+

#4 It's PG for the following reasons:
a. Swearing/cursing. Some letters may be bleeped out with asterisks.
b. Blood and wounds in some parts, and also violence.

#5 I have animals in my pokémon stories--and insects. I don't have big animals like horses or lions or anything, though. :P Just fish, maybe birds, lizards, frogs and mice, etc.

#6 I am Australian, which means I use UK/Canadian/Australian spelling of things, which includes using 's' instead of 'z' in a lot of words, and adding a 'u' to words containing an 'a' right before. Keep this in mind. x)

#7 Watch out for the frequent perspective change. It’s not first person, but it tends to switch between human and pokémon perspective. xDD Keep this in mind.




Thanks for dropping by. Hope you like it. ^^
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Last edited by Graceful_Suicune; 11-18-2010 at 07:35 AM.
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Old 11-18-2010, 07:32 AM
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Default Re: Howling in the Shadows [PG]

Chapter One: Retrieve and Return

It was a still night. Rivers calmly hurried along their trails, carrying with them anything they happened to acquire along the way. The Moon distanced itself from the world as it peered down, shedding radiance upon the trees and occasionally being surpassed by the odd wispy cloud or two. The inky blackness above harbouring speckles of shimmering sparkles seemed to stretch for miles. The air became stale and dense as it leapt through the darkness, and with it, the scent of nature. The boughs of sleeping oaks and birches creaked as their owners lay almost still in peace, a pachirisu in much the same state shifting to become more comfortable. A chilly wind suddenly swept the ground, running down grass and blowing a plume of smoke in the direction of land already scaled.

Two human hands reached for a plastic bag and withdrew a carrot.

“I’m telling you, it’s going to taste horrible,” huffed a girl of about fifteen. She leaned against a stump with her arms crossed and her legs outstretched, one bent at the knee, and she had her eyes closed with annoyance. She removed a hand and flicked back fluffy chestnut hair from her face, tucking it behind her ear. She wore a yellow jacket half unzipped, the white top underneath fairly visible in the darkness. A black skirt began where the jacket finished, and her shoes, petite and pointed, were directed to her friend.

“I asked you if you wanted to cook,” began the second human, “but you wanted me to do it. So don’t complain.” He dipped the ladle under the soup’s surface, scooping chucks of potato, celery and turnip. He lifted it and turned it sideways, watching as it spilled into the cooking pot again, and set it against the pot’s edge. A knife lying beside his knee found its way into his hand, and he started chopping, hearing the plop of each carrot slice break the soup’s surface. He was careful not to cut his thumb as he used it to steady the vegetable.

“I don’t like carrots, Tau!” She slid further down the stump, catching herself before landing all of her back on the ground.

The boy flashed his glance and sighed. “You’ll break your back at that rate,” he commented, continuing to chop.

“Says who?” questioned the girl, but the boy looked less than interested in replying. Instead he continued until the carrot was but a stump, and he set that aside with the other vegetable ends.

***

Paws flattened grass, each strand slowly straightening up as the bodies left their space. Straightened necks levelled with strong shoulder blades, ears flattened and eyes navigated with a wary gleam. Curled muzzles revealed sharp fangs, and they glistened under the dim moonlight.

The shuffle of movement ceased as a fleet came to a halt, all members standing tall and observant as they surveyed the area. Six figures stood behind the clear leader, their loyalty stretching out and their pride brimming.

There was a growl as one member took a step, addressing his leader. “Where do we go from here?”

The leader’s eyes narrowed, a determined light flickering between them. “Onward. They have only minutes before we arrive and reclaim what they stole.”

“Affirmative,” the follower muttered.

“...Let’s move.”

***

The girl sighed. “It’s so boring out here,” she complained, throwing back her head and opening her eyes. The stars shimmered to her pupils and edged her into a trance. However, the cold got the better of her once it swept past, chilling her skin and causing tiny lumps to form on the surface. She shivered, grasping each arm with the opposite hand, and looked to the soup as if for comfort. Its relentless steam wafted to her nose, and she secretly found the smell pleasant—despite never intending to admit such a thing. Next she pushed off the rock, leaned forward, and drew her friend’s backpack near. Her hand dove in and searched through soft and hard objects until she found a miniature sphere. She took it between her fingers and brought it out, tapping it once. It forced her fingers apart as it grew, and she was about to click the button as a sound began flooding the area. Her eyes enlarged and her head flicked in several directions, noises such as snapping twigs being detected from all sides of her.

The boy seemed to notice as well as he took his wary eyes from the pot and set down the current ingredient he’d been shaving. The knife remained in his hand as he held his spot kneeling, and steadied his head as his eyes did the looking. A loud rustle made his head turn, however, and he suspected what was behind the bushes. As silhouettes emerged from the bordering plantation, he cautiously reached behind him, his hand feeling the ground in many places before he heard another shuffle. He tossed his head to his left, and in the same line of sight he spied his friend clutching his backpack. He gave a scowl as she shrugged sheepishly, shoving the poké ball back into his bag into a side pocket, and contemplated sliding it over to him as they began to realise they were being surrounded.

One by one the predators appeared from the bracken, and soon Tau could count six. He wondered what he and his friend’s chances would be and if they could honestly escape without an injury. The girl wondered the same thing, although she was more frantic and desperate as she failed to control her shivering.

With an eerie silence another pokémon appeared before them, only mere metres from the duo, and from the looks of it, it was the leader. Its position confirmed this, as well as the unspoken authority which danced about it. Tau swallowed, analysing the situation. He and his pokémon could fight, but he didn’t know about his friend. She had only one pokémon, and it was beyond strong enough to go up against a pack of wild pokémon. “Pass me my poké balls,” he uttered, not making eye contact with the girl a year or so younger than him.

“What if they attack?” she whispered timidly, her grip on the bag tightening.

“That’s precisely why I need them,” he retorted, a trace of annoyance in his tone.

“I meant before you can throw the poké ball!” she cried, and the force of pokémon around her snarled in response. She squeaked in fear, her head retreating into her shoulders and her eyes squeezing tightly shut. Her knees met as her calves spread out and the rock padded her back.

Tau gritted his teeth and glanced at who he presumed to be the leader of the pack. He was aware of what would happen to them if he didn’t do something. “...I see. Unwilling to part with your friend,” he guessed, figuring that to be the only logical reason. “Or you’re dark pokémon looking for revenge.” He lowered his hands, concealing the knife between his knees as he stayed kneeling, and looked the lead pokémon square in the face.

In return the creature stepped forward, revealing herself under the starry sky. “I suppose you know why we’re here,” she growled, unable to understand the human’s dialect. However, she could assume. “Locate Eight.”

A muzzle met the dirt and began snuffling, when suddenly a scent licked his nose. “He was here,” he informed, but he knew that was a fairly obvious statement. He followed his paws as the rest of the pack kept their ears sharp and maws ready, and he paused only several paces from one of the humans. “He’s in the material pouch.”

“Is that so...?” questioned the leader, a sneer crossing her face. She didn’t intend on a slaughter of sorts, but she would take more than her fellow pack member as payment. “Retrieve him.”

Without warning the human holding the pouch screamed and shoved its hand into it, pulling out a pawful of familiar spheres and threw them forcefully at Four. He avoided them, pulling back to his colleagues. With a light similar to the glow of fire, three forms were released, and took the shape of recognisable pokémon. The first one became clear as a yellow bipedal pokémon with a moustache, pronged toes and a cerise star shape on his head took shape. His tail was similar to a growlithe’s in shape, and his torso was brown. He bore a human utensil in one paw, and the other surrounded the item’s head. Second to take shape was a purple dual type pokémon with cyan skin stretching between the pincers on the end of her tiny arms and the bobbles that resembled feet. She hooked her feet into the ground as her scorpion-like tail swept the dust. The last pokémon to show up revealed himself as a stout, cocky greenish-blue creature with silver half-discs on his head. He didn’t need to flex his arm muscles to show how much strength he possessed, since it was basically radiating from him.

The group leader stood her ground, calculating their advantages. Her pack’s dark pelts would blend with the shadows and allow for cover, but the external bone features they showed would possibly give them away. They had speed on their side, but they were weak to fighting type attacks, deeming the machop equally as dangerous as the gligar, whose ground type attacks and aerial advantage would surely prove difficult to overcome. She knew with attacks such as bite and faint attack, they would be able to take down the kadabra, and relying on nighttime, speed and numbers, hopefully the other two would not hinder their objective. If worst came to worst, they would have to settle merely for Eight and then retreat, but she wouldn’t allow that to happen. Not when she was in command.

Tau glared at his friend, furious with her decision. “Idiot!” he hissed.

“W-what?” she gasped, blinking repeatedly. “We need protection! I need protection!”

“If they think we’re going to attack, they will view us as threats,” he exclaimed.

“They were going to anyway!” the girl protested, and was startled by a snap from one of the wild pokémon.

The boy sighed, keeping a watchful eye on his pokémon while talking to her. “Listen to me—”

“Tau, they’re houndours! They probably want to kill us and eat us! We shouldn’t ha—”

“Kuchi!” he snapped, feeling his short black hair mingle on his head as he jerked it. She gasped, clearly not expecting his out-burst. “You’re ridiculous.” On impulse he felt for the knife to ensure it was still there.

“I’m...I’m scared,” she whimpered, throwing her distressed expression into his eyes. He shook his head.

“...Don’t do anything unless I say,” Tau ordered, settling down. He had to keep focused to avoid distractions. And at this rate Kuchi would surely screw something up. “We might be able to drive them off like before...”

The houndour in charge uttered commands to her comrades and prepped herself for battle. She tore a prickle from her toe and spat it aside, her ears twitching as two houndour backed into the bushes behind her and out of sight. “Attack on ‘one’,” she murmured to the others.

“We don’t have to do this,” mentioned a voice, and soon enough it became clear that the trainer’s kadabra was speaking. The lead houndour, Two, met his gaze.

“Oh?” she started, her defences at the ready. “I don’t believe you’re in command. Three...”

“You kidding?” asked the machop, spinning his arm like a rotor. “I’m pumped for another fight!”

The kadabra frowned at him, then looked back to the houndour. “If you leave now, we won’t have to battle again.”

“How dare you dictate my pack’s movements,” the houndour scowled, a look of civil distain clouding her face. “Two...”

“I’m only suggesting,” he sighed, closing her eyes. “Wild pokémon are so difficult...”

A growl rippled from the houndour’s jaws as her claws stabbed the earth. “Traitor,” she retorted. “One!”

All at once three houndour leapt, and only two landed on their targets as the other was knocked back by a psychic barrier. She picked herself up and shook her head, and the taller psychic type stared down at her with disapproving eyes. She heard one of the humans call an order to its pokémon, and she darted from the psychic beam, taking a moment to survey the area. A pair of her houndour was fighting the machop, one was fending off the gligar, and the other was attempting to steal the pouch. However, the gligar was quick to notice and somehow sprung from the ground, spreading her skin, and glided up and back down in a flip. She sliced past the opposing houndour and headed straight for the one near the pouch one of the humans was grasping.

Another energy blast powered past Two and she dodged by a hair. She sneered and ran towards her opponent, and just as she was sure she’d run into the barrier, she released a cloud of smoke from between her teeth. Next she fused with the shadows and shifted behind him, temporarily fooling the psychic type. Two watched him look about before she plunged into him headfirst, and he stumbled, falling on his hands as he removed his barrier. She took this opportunity to blow a wisp of fire to him, and although it was weak, it reached him. She then whirled around and was quick to come in contact with the machop, who dashed in front of her after one of her fellow houndour, and without a second thought she blew an ember at him. He put his pursuit on hold as he whirled around, his fist following. Two yelped, ducking and bowling him over by ramming into his exposed legs. She once again spotted the humans’ pouch and scowled, unhappy with the fact of it still being in their possession.

Suddenly her shoulder screamed, and she was knocked backwards, only to realise a karate chop had resulted from her lack in paying attention to her attacker. “Gotta be faster than that to beat me!” the fighting type mocked, inviting her to stand while he held his offensive pose. The houndour pulled herself up, feeling the muscle in her shoulder tighten. At the same time she spotted a houndour sneaking up from behind the machop, and she made no reaction to give her away as she lunged and tumbled with the machop. Two silently approved as she let her colleague take care of the foe and padded closer to the pouch, the cowardly human shrieking in fear.

“D—Two!” called a male’s voice, and Two turned to see Six with a wide-eyed expression.

She barely had time to wonder why he held such a face before she was swooped and knocked over. The gligar attached herself to the tree nearby and threw her wide head over her shoulder, revealing fangs and focused eyes. She hissed, unlatching herself again and soaring downwards, much to Two’s dismay. However, the houndour managed to project another ember, but it hardly skimmed the gligar’s underbelly. The male whose warning was wasted bounded forward, leaping from the ground and by chance happened to hook his jaws onto the ground and flying type’s tail. There was a squeak before they made a fast descent and thudded into the earth, puffs of dirt rising.

Two nodded to him, although he didn’t see, and turned back around. She was surprised to see the other human with the frightened one, and this one had a firm, sturdier stance. She assumed the one who had moved was a male, since its voice had sounded deep. It was impossible to tell, however, as she hadn’t had experience with humans other than these in her lifetime.

She neared them both, her eyes fixed on the pouch as the presumable male stood. She came to a halt, but the human became momentarily distracted as one of the houndour she’d sent to conceal herself pounced into the clearing. Two took this opportunity to dash forwards, catch the pouch in her jaws as the other human squealed, and managed to avoid a near encounter with the male’s metal claw. She tossed the heavy brown load to the houndour who jumped from the bushes, and she too snatched it and whisked it away through the trees. With a growl the male human called out, but seemed too cowardly to do anything. The other one was much weaker, however, and merely sat shaking, its eyes bound by its own fear. Two grunted, almost hoping that it wasn’t female considering how pathetic it was. The female houndour in her pack were as strong – if not stronger – than the males, and were much better at hunting.

She left the humans behind her as she barked a command, and she disappeared through the clearing’s border. Her comrades fell back and began tailing her, and she was close to smiling as she realised their success.

“T...Tau...?” began Kuchi slowly, taking her hands from her eyes. “A-are they all gone?”

The boy clenched his teeth, thinking things over as he stood facing the direction the houndour had both come and gone. His knife clattered to the ground as he released it, and his eyes watched without flickering. His options ran through his mind as quickly as a herd of stampeding tauros. Should he go after those wretched thieves and risk injury? Was it more sensible to wait and strike in daylight? Should he go at all? He tossed his head towards his party; his kadabra was in poor shape, but his machop and gligar looked only a little damaged. If he left his kadabra behind, he could take his machop and gligar with him wi—

“Tau?” the girl repeated, a curious and worried tone in her words.

“What?” he uttered sharply, catching his friend off guard. She flinched and resumed her pleading look.

“Are we safe?”

“You don’t need my confirmation,” he grumbled, turning away. His eyes fell upon the cooking pot. He valued his dinner, but retrieving his backpack was more important. Besides, his belly could wait. He couldn’t afford to lose anything in his backpack, and with wild pokémon in possession of his things, what chance did they have of surviving? In a hurry he rushed to his pokémon, instructing the psychic type to stay since he was presently incompetent, and commanded his other pokémon to guard and fight for him.

Kuchi got to her feet and flung her worried glance about. “T-Tau, where are you going?”

“After my stuff,” he replied without a second thought, not bothering to meet her stare.

“W—but you can’t leave me!” she squealed, shaking her head and holding her fists against her chest.

“I’m not taking Kadabra,” he responded, walking a number of steps toward his burglars.

“W-wait!” Kuchi called. Tau finally made eye contact, halting. She paused, going through her choices in her head. She didn’t want to go with him because she’d be put in danger, but at the same time, staying behind was not high on her preference list either. She tried to convince herself that with her pokémon and Kadabra she would be safe. She bit her lip momentarily. “...Be careful,” she told him. “A-and don’t be too long.” However, quickly realising how she sounded, she stuttered. “U-um... Because... I...I’m hungry, and you need to finish the soup.”

Tau turned back around, saying, “If you’re hungry, finish making it.” The boy disappeared through the shrubs, his gligar gliding after him and his machop powering on ahead.

Kuchi lowered her head, sighing as Kadabra neared. He looked weak in his current condition, and she felt a little sorry for him, and stretched her hand out to stroke his nose. After grabbing her bag she reached in and revealed a blue ball with red lumps, tapped it, and pressed the button. After the sphere snapped open a plume of red energy flowed out, forming the shape of a round creature. As the energy faded and the great ball was collected by the trainer, a small figure stood on the ground. Large oval ears sat upon his head and a white belly covered most of his front. He glanced to his trainer with a U shaped smile, and she tried to reflect it back at him. She had little success as the pokémon outdid her, and tilted his body, supporting himself with little blue feet.

Continued in next post...
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Last edited by Graceful_Suicune; 12-04-2010 at 01:06 PM.
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Old 11-18-2010, 07:34 AM
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Default Re: Howling in the Shadows [PG]

Kuchi laid a hand on his head, reassuring him, and sat herself on the rock she’d been leaning against earlier. Her marill looked to Kadabra and grinned, spraying a shower of harmless water. The psychic type didn’t show any indication of discomfort, so the water pokémon continued absent-mindedly.

Kuchi moved her eyes to the pot and sighed. She wasn’t hungry at all.

***

Tau took his hand off the ground and rose to his feet, frowning to himself. “Houndour tracks...” He directed his head forward, failing to spot any dark figure dashing beyond the hills. Tall and thick grass littered the ground from where he stood for as far as he could see. Mounds of dirt caused the ground to rise in several places, and trees placed at random with shady bark provided shadows for the beasts to hide in. No doubt they were lying in wait, ready to strike.

Nevertheless, he would track them down and claim his backpack once more. He didn’t need to battle as such, but having two healthy pokémon – both with defences and advantages against the nocturnal pokémon – was certainly necessary.

His machop shouted an alarmed call, and Tau quickened his pace, finding the fighting type waiting eagerly behind a shrub. Lying in the dirt was his backpack. It was barely damaged; a few tooth marks scattered the opening, and he was just glad they didn’t have to tear it to shreds to retrieve what they were after, as the bag was already open. Bending down, he took it in a curled fist and inspected the contents. Just as he expected. He narrowed his eyes, lifting his head and spying empty hills a short distance away he knew the houndour had shortly passed over.

‘Typical dark types.’

***

Two and her followers entered the pack grounds, no longer required to keep low and rely on darkness for cover. It was typical that humans were the culprits in such a situation; Dusk had only ever heard troublesome word about the species of animal, and although they were the supposed dominant race, she had never come across one before. Although crafty and seemingly resourceful, she was less than intimidated by them, and they were blatantly outsmarted by the canine pokémon without even trying.

She kept her pride at a suitable level as she passed through short strands of grass, acknowledging certain pack members as she led her squad down the middle path. A rising slant accompanied by a ledge overlooking most of the territory waited patiently a short way ahead, and she knew that leading her comrades there was no less than a privilege; it was something that not every houndour had the superiority to do. She was fortunate to have such a significant position in her pack, and she never planned on giving it up.

One step led to another until she eventually reached the slope and effortlessly walked its distance to the top. She rotated her neck to view a following group of her comrades, and nearly smiled as she recalled the success that they achieved. They even managed to acquire a sort of human device. Two had not a clue what it was or how to operate it, however, and figured that passing it to the pack leader was appropriate. Other than that she had no use for it anyway.

‘We’re here...’ she suddenly thought, craning her neck at the high rising top of the entrance to a fairly open cave. She felt her heart skip a beat as she felt the soft press of nerves, but kept her strength at bay to be easily retrievable. She held out her chest as she sat, her comrades taking their places in a semi-circle behind her as she waited patiently until a shadow leapt onto the end of the cave wall she could see. It grew before a figure emerged from the left end, and it rounded the corner to show itself fully as a form similar to Two’s.

She bowed her head, her fellow pack members copying before they raised them again to meet the eyes of their leader. The majestic houndour strode with pride in his steps until the moonlight lit his pelt and revealed his dark red muzzle and the healthy strips of bone clenching his back. His scruffy fur gave him the appearance of a wise and experienced pokémon who had endured many battles. The noble, clean eyes he held were proof of his leadership and his size, being larger than an average pokémon of his species, was evidence of his earned place in the pack’s hierarchy. His piercing fangs showed as he addressed Two, and she lightened up on the inside as he did.

“Welcome back,” he began, uttering a gruff bark as a greeting, which Two returned.

“We return with what’s rightfully ours,” she stated, turning and signalling to another houndour to come forward and place a spherical item on the rock. He backed up and fell into line as Two stopped the object from rolling with her paw.

“Well done,” the leader commented, rolling the item to his planted paw and applying pressure to what looked like a button.

Suddenly the sphere snapped in half, although it was still connected at a particular part, and cerise light spewed from inside, forming a familiar shape. Two gasped as someone she was well acquainted with evolved from the light, and the object fell closed again. Confusion danced around her ears before she focused on the new male that stood slightly hunched and with bent legs. “Ugh...”

“E-Eight?” Two wondered, her eyelids falling repeatedly.

“You will take care not to be apprehended next time,” ordered the lead houndour, and Eight, after observing his surroundings and listening with intent attention, nodded quickly. “Don’t let yourself lose to your opponent, or the consequences can be dire.” He narrowed his eyes and emitted a small rumble, displaying his disapproval for the houndour’s foolishness.

“Yes, Shadetooth!” responded the pack member, giving a curt bow before stepping back to join his comrades.

“I’ll make sure to deal with him later,” Two interjected, and Shadetooth seemed content with that.

“However, I am relieved that you have returned unharmed.” He nearly smiled before his gaze flicked back to her, and she nearly flinched at his abruptness. “And the device?”

“Yes, sir—it’s right here.” Meeting the eyes of a houndour behind her, the human object was placed before the leader.

“Excellent,” he praised, reaching down to take the elongated side in his maw. He dipped his head at his followers, and Two straightened up, mimicking him, and he turned to disappear back into the cave, around the left corner.

With no more than a moment’s hesitation, she wheeled around and addressed her fellow members, beginning to pace. “Alright,” she began, her voice loud, “it’s a new night with many opportunities. Let’s not allow it to go to waste.” Her comrades gave acknowledging nods, each of them moving off down the slope. Only one remained, and Two looked down on him as he sheepishly smiled. She approached him and narrowed her eyes to slits, in no time towering over his almost-cowering body. He waited fondly until he heard Two’s lips part into a grin, and she uttered, “As the leader said, the consequences can be dire.” There was silence before she snorted and brushed past him, shoving his side at the last moment. She continued down the rock before she heard a small growl, and rotated her head before something plummeted into her, and the two thudded against rock as they descended the slope. Many short barks and rumbles escaped each houndour before a crash ended with Two looming over a feeble Eight. Her eyes darkened and her lips rolled into a snarl as Eight drew in his front legs to his chest. “You dare question my authority?” she snapped, holding her position. Her face remained harsh as Eight displayed a toothy apologetic but somehow satiric expression, and the two continued their stare-down as tension continued to rise.

Several moments wavered by and Eight held his breath.

All at once the two broke out into laughter, Two’s much quieter, however, and the stronger houndour moved away, allowing Eight to stand. They shared another giggle before Eight tackled her to the ground once more, licking her cheek. “I’m so glad I’m back!” he chanted between licks, and the houndour beneath him flailed her paws.

“Okay, okay!” she responded with closed eyes. “Enough.”

Obeying happily, Eight allowed Two her freedom and stepped aside. Two gathered herself and stood with a content smile. “I owe you,” he told her, and she shrugged.

“We need you, Eight.”

He frowned lightly at her. “Stop with the formalities,” he insisted, and Two looked unsure. “We’re not on duty, so...why do you always call me that?”

“It’s out of habit,” she replied submissively.

“Come on, Dusk,” he began, “we’ve known each other since our dawns, and yet you still call me ‘Eight’.”

Dusk thought this over, her friend’s point evident. “Yes...” She motioned for him to follow as she padded away from the leader’s cave, and he jogged to her side.

“...Was that why you rescued me?” he questioned, and his friend grew a question of her own between her features. “Because the pack...needs me?”

She hesitated before nodding. “Yes.”

In response he felt a meek smile tug at a corner of his lips, and he lowered his head almost forlornly. “I see.” Altering the course of the conversation, he asked, “How did you do it? ...How did you manage to get out of there?”

Dusk took a moment before realising what he meant, and she slowed to a stop, facing him. “One might call it luck.”

“You call it chance, right?” he replied, smiling. She reflected his expression more lightly.

“In this case...teamwork.”

***

“There is nothing here,” commented a houndour, facing another of her species. “Two, there is no sense in staying. Let us go north. Clearly there is nothing here,” she urged, impatience making her ears twitch.

“Hush,” snapped Dusk, hostility provoking her. However, keeping up her professional appearance was too important to let anger obstruct her goals. “We will move on soon.” She took a breath and analysed the bushes in the near distance one last time.

“Let us move off at once!” called the lower-ranked houndour, and as each member listened to the unexpected words, they were at a loss for what to do. Dusk, however, knew her movements perfectly.

“Three!” she boomed, taking the other houndour by surprise. “Am I not the one in command?”

Three was taken aback, her eyes round and her jaws slightly parted. In a hurry it dissipated and was replaced by a stern growl and planted paws. “You’re not the pack leader, Two!” she retorted.

“I am in regards to the Scouting Fleet!” Dusk snarled, lowering her head so her eyes barely showed below her bone helmet. The two females shot spears between each other as they growled in disagreement, and one of the other houndour, Eight, spoke up.

“Umm...are we moving on or...?” he wondered, unsure if he should have intervened at all. After all, he knew that disturbing Dusk when she was ready to shoot fire at anytime wasn’t smart.

“Shut up, Eclipse!” Three exclaimed, tossing an extra spear in his direction.

“Maybe you should take your own advice, Kita...” he mumbled once she turned away, but immediately she returned her penetrating glare.

“What was that?!”

“N-nothing!” he exclaimed half-innocently, dodging another spear.

With a huff Dusk exhaled through her nose and soon had her tail end in Kita’s face, and the female houndour growled in response, although the group’s leader was hardly fazed. She wouldn’t waste her breath on a houndour who was not worth it. She uttered a command to the other members, beginning to walk. Her pace soon morphed into a trot, which became a lope. Wind poured past her left and right, her ears lying flat on her head as her tail remained stiff and straight.

The group of five reached a small hill that rose for several leaps before reaching its peak, and they trailed it down the other side, spotting their welcoming giant rock formation in the distance. Dusk estimated that it would take no more than twenty minutes to reach if they kept up a strong pace, but that would be fairly unnecessary considering they had no reason to rush. In a short scale, anyway.

After roughly ten minutes of sweating and racing, the small pack voted to rest, initially proposed by Eclipse. They had stopped by the side of a rushing river whose banks were steep and guarded by thick reeds. One houndour nearly became tangled and tossed into the current, but Dusk had been quick to act and sliced through the weeds using teeth alight with fire, and pulled the pack member by the scruff onto flat ground. He was a rather small houndour, and quite new to the Scouting Fleet. Dusk had briefly lectured him on watching where he stepped and how their pads often failed to grasp stability on slippery surfaces. He’d apologised and vowed he’d be more careful.

She nodded in approval, facing the rushing water once again. A chilled wind whipped her fur and proceeded to settle into a mere breeze, carrying with it the smell of bark and water. ‘How troublesome. Hopefully this doesn’t mean a storm...’ She raised her muzzle skywards and inhaled, picking up no trace of an unusual scent.

“Two,” began one of the members, his voice low, “I sense something...something that isn’t naturally here.” Dusk looked at him through slits, remaining rather calm.

“Anything specific?” she inquired.

The houndour lifted his muzzle and tested the air again, lowering it to the packed soil and waiting to detect a kind of vibration or other indication of a presence besides the Fleet’s. “...Something’s approaching.”

Dusk’s brow rose. “Prey? Predator? Is it not an identifiable subject, Four?”

“Sensing is not exact. Hence its name: a sensory guess,” intervened Kita, who was lying lazily near the bank’s edge. She gave a rude yawn, clearly not fazed in the slightest.

“I outrank you, Three, and my demotion decisions require only the support of the leader.” She gave a threatening rumble, and Kita frowned and drew a sharp breath through clenched fangs, holding her tongue. “Do not provoke me.”

A sudden collection of growls filled the air as the other three houndour backed up, their tails rigid and hackles raised. Dusk threw her eyes to the direction of soft chatter and pawsteps, and suddenly all noise halted. They waited in angst as the thick bushes hid secret figures, and silence prickled the air as nobody dared make a move.

The Fleet’s leader barely breathed as she waited, and chanced a step forwards. All too fast a duo of tall-standing creatures appeared in the area, their strange appearance coming across as clearly not pokémon.

“H...humans!” barked the smallest houndour, and Dusk’s eyes widened. Never in her life had she come across them before, and therefore she hadn’t a clue what they looked like. Obviously this houndour did, though, and she would not take her chances with them.

“Drive them off!” commanded Dusk, and she supported her instruction by shooting towards the intruders and releasing a curling line of flames. She was followed by Kita, who sprung before Four.

The creatures blanketed with strange material similar to fur shrieked and exchanged some kind of foreign dialogue, and the sturdier-looking one released a kadabra. Immediately it commanded him to use a psychic type attack, which Dusk didn’t have to dodge. The strange wave of energy hit her spot-on, but its odd power had no effect. The human gasped, and the houndour sneered. She launched another fire spin, the fire spiralling towards the psychic type before striking. However, he was ordered to create a barrier, and somehow the female houndour understood what the human had said: light screen.

Immediately her attack was broken off and the flames no less than smouldered as she cut it short. She gripped the ground, coming to a halt and quickly ducked as a machop – who must have been released while she was distracted – powered past the shield and failed to connect a swipe with Dusk. He picked himself up with a swift movement, ploughing through whatever would stand in his way to land a fist in the small male houndour’s jaw.

There was a yelp, and Kita seemed to work on tearing through the barrier while Eclipse darted to his friend’s side, facing the machop. Another pokémon materialised presumably to also help the humans, and the round, blue and white form was evidently a marill. He proceeded to shoot a trail of high-pressured water at Four, and the houndour was sprayed by the mist as he narrowly avoided the attack. As soon as he landed, the marill let loose a second attack, causing the houndour to yelp and unintentionally hug a tree.

“Dusk, what do we do?” he urged, and she growled at him, stating rather firmly that he should decide on his own.

Suddenly an airborne object appeared from the direction of the humans, and the Fleet’s leader felt her shoulders tighten. Whatever it was it was travelling on an unavoidable course, and it didn’t take her long to notice that she was not the target. The male houndour stood dumbfounded as it soared towards him, and Dusk clenched her jaws, yelling, “Eclipse!” and tackled him from the item’s way, enduring the hit as it bounced from her helmet.

She saw him tumble and slide across the stones before stopping himself and flicking his head to meet Dusk’s eyes. He shouted as she was enveloped in a celestial glow and all became black, the fading and muffled noises morphing into silence as the houndour slowly slipped from consciousness.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

That's chapter one. ^^

~GS.
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  #4  
Old 11-18-2010, 09:00 AM
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Default Re: Howling in the Shadows [PG]

YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY YOU GOT IT UP!

Quote:
She had only one pokémon, and it was beyond strong enough to go up against a pack of wild pokémon.
Beyond would mean more strong. o:

Quote:
A pair of her houndour was fighting the machop
Were.

Quote:
She once again spotted the humans’ pouch and scowled, unhappy with the fact of it still being in their possession.
This sentence is kinda confusing..

Quote:
Suddenly her shoulder screamed, and she was knocked backwards
"Suddenly her shoulder screamed" made me imagine it actually having a mouth and screaming. XD Though I think you put 'screamed with pain' or something because I wasn't sure what you meant at first.

Quote:
As soon as he landed, the marill let loose a second attack, causing the houndour to yelp and unintentionally hug a tree.
XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD


Okay, first of all I really like how you set up the houndour packs (pack?). I like how they all planned to attack the human and knew about his pokemon's type weaknesses (though I wonder, have they seen those pokemon before to know what type they were (aside from the kadabra)?) I wonder something though...Dusk was thinking about the females in the pack being stronger, so I assumed the other leader they were talking about was going to be female. I was pretty surprised when he was male. o: Though I guess that's just a general rule thing?

I'm also kind of confused about the packs themselves. Is there just one pack, with Dusk being in charge of a certain group sometimes, or are there multiple packs that are under the rule of that one houndour. I think it's the first one, but I'm not sure.

I also like the idea of them having real names and numbered ones. I noticed they called Shadetooth by his name...is that because he is the leader and the one who gets to be formally called by a name? I also wonder if the numbering thing works based on how high or low ranking a houndour is. Two is a high rank, and Eight is a low one, so it seems like that's how it works. o:

I wonder what those humans were doing out there, especially the girl (since she only had one weak pokemon) and what that device they had with them was. I like how the houndour called his knife a "metal claw" (do they call it that because of the pokemon attack?). I also liked how you made each group think it was typical of the other to do something (typical dark types, typical humans...).

The ending scene kinda confused me at first because I didn't know it was a flashback when I started reading it. o.o And I was also confused with how Eclipse got captured since it said the pokeball bounced off Dusk's head?


Anyway, yay for houndour stories! Especially really well thought out ones like this! I'm really interested to see where the story goes because it hasn't shown what the main plot is yet and I'm really curious about what that is. I really liked this chapter though and I think it's a good introduction to the story. *v*
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Old 11-18-2010, 10:20 AM
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Default Re: Howling in the Shadows [PG]

Quote:
Originally Posted by Scytherwolf View Post
YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY YOU GOT IT UP!

Beyond would mean more strong. o:

Were.

This sentence is kinda confusing..

"Suddenly her shoulder screamed" made me imagine it actually having a mouth and screaming. XD Though I think you put 'screamed with pain' or something because I wasn't sure what you meant at first.

XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD
8DDDDDDDDDDDD INORITEIT'SSOEXCITEMENT!

xDD I just realised that as I reread it as the quote thing, and thought that, and now I realise I skipped that point while I was editing it earlier, so I missed it. xDD SILLY ME.

Well I hate the 'were' and 'was' thing, because Word says that a pair and a group and a collection would be 'was', even though I would say 'were'. Like, if I was to write "the group were tired", it'd say "the group was tired", since it groups them to be one, almost, and I think it's the same with pairs...unless I didn't double check. xD

Really? o: It's just her being annoyed because they still had the bag. xD

xDDDDDDDDDDDD Yeah, haha, it was supposed to be metaphorical, but now that you mention it, I should say "in pain", shouldn't I? xD

Quote:
Originally Posted by Scytherwolf View Post
Okay, first of all I really like how you set up the houndour packs (pack?). I like how they all planned to attack the human and knew about his pokemon's type weaknesses (though I wonder, have they seen those pokemon before to know what type they were (aside from the kadabra)?) I wonder something though...Dusk was thinking about the females in the pack being stronger, so I assumed the other leader they were talking about was going to be female. I was pretty surprised when he was male. o: Though I guess that's just a general rule thing?

I'm also kind of confused about the packs themselves. Is there just one pack, with Dusk being in charge of a certain group sometimes, or are there multiple packs that are under the rule of that one houndour. I think it's the first one, but I'm not sure.
WHY THANK YOU. Pack. x) Thanks! Yeah, haha, they would have, I'd think. I mean, they've seen his pokemon before, since they were previously attacked by him, and yeah--they'd have seen the species before. Oh, well that--it's more that the females are great hunters and fighters (reminds me of lions xD), and, I mean, so are the males, but it's also partly Dusk's opinion, which you have to be aware of. But the other thing is that the hunters and fighters aren't necessarily cut out to be leaders, and aren't capable of making those kinds of decisions--I'm not picking on them or anything, but they do need a strong leader who's large, knows their (in this case, his) place, and can lead a pack. The other thing is inheritance and the fact of being an heir to the pack's "throne", I suppose, and also that the leader needs strong body guards (highly ranked houndour) or similar things, and it's kind of how a king relies on his soldiers to fight for him, type of thing.

Oh, haha, it's one pack. Sorry for the confusion; I didn't make it very clear, did I? xD Later you'll find out that Dusk has a frequent "Scouting Fleet" which she takes care of, being ranked as second in the whole pack. It got confusing because I used "pack" for a group, so I'll change that. xDD

Quote:
Originally Posted by Scytherwolf View Post
I also like the idea of them having real names and numbered ones. I noticed they called Shadetooth by his name...is that because he is the leader and the one who gets to be formally called by a name? I also wonder if the numbering thing works based on how high or low ranking a houndour is. Two is a high rank, and Eight is a low one, so it seems like that's how it works. o:

I wonder what those humans were doing out there, especially the girl (since she only had one weak pokemon) and what that device they had with them was. I like how the houndour called his knife a "metal claw" (do they call it that because of the pokemon attack?). I also liked how you made each group think it was typical of the other to do something (typical dark types, typical humans...).
Thanks! 8D Yeah, I thought doing something like that would be interesting. Well that was mainly Eclipse, since he's a bit of a dope sometimes, and Dusk only calls him that to herself. If you notice, he's referred to as "the leader" otherwise. I was contemplating having him as "One", but I stuck with "the leader". =) And yes, it's got to do with rankings. Each houndour earns their title, basically. Yes, haha, Eclipse isn't that interested in being higher ranked than Eight, since he's content with that, and he's not strong enough in a few ways to have his rank heightened anyway. I'll go more into depth in the future. x)

Haha, yeah. YAY FOR QUESTIONS. :D Hehe, Kuchi. I hope I can explain all that soon. Or sometime, anyway. xD When the time is right! I don't know when you'll find that out (what the object is). But it's something simple, and it's also something that's appeared in TtEoaF. xD Haha, thanks! I think I got it from things like the Wolf Brother books, how Wolf depicts things really cutely and creatively, and if he doesn't know what something is he'll fuse two things together that are similar (that's kinda what I tried to do--it's sharp and in a hand - claw - and it's made from metal). Oh, haha, I didn't even realise it was a pokemon attack till I read your comment. xD Well, I knew it was, but I didn't make the connection! xD But no, just because of the appearance. Hahaha, thanks! I thought that would make it funny in the sense that they both think they're the innocent ones, and yeah, that it's typical that the other would do something like that. And it also shows how stereotypical people AND pokemon can be. How the WORLD IS. O_O INTENSE. LIKE CAMPING.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Scytherwolf View Post
The ending scene kinda confused me at first because I didn't know it was a flashback when I started reading it. o.o And I was also confused with how Eclipse got captured since it said the pokeball bounced off Dusk's head?

Anyway, yay for houndour stories! Especially really well thought out ones like this! I'm really interested to see where the story goes because it hasn't shown what the main plot is yet and I'm really curious about what that is. I really liked this chapter though and I think it's a good introduction to the story. *v*
Haha, well I wanted it to be unclear in a sense, because usually things are too obvious in my stories... That's part of the reason you might be getting confused by things--because I realise that in stories not everything should be spelled out, and I kind of wanted people to figure things like that out by themselves. Hahaha, well it's okay, because everything will become clear in chapter two. xD I also thought that if people read this chapter after chapter (since I expect people to start reading while I'm a few chapters in) then they won't get as confused, but because there's only one chapter so far, there are a lot of unanswered questions. xD So you'll have to wait. x)

Yay! 8D I'm so excitement to be writing one. :D Aw, thanks! ^v^ And yeah, haha, you know me--I spend a few chapters setting everything up before I jump into the plot. Thank you! 8D Aw, I'm so glad. xDD I'm also really happy I could get it up today, because I really wanted to show you. x) But you know what's really awesome? HAVING ANSWERS TO THE QUESTIONS YOU ASK. As opposed to you asking things that I have not sorted out yet, and therefore I'd be unable to give you an answer. xDD SO YEAH. It'll probably be a while before I get chapter 2 up, but I'll try to get it up sooner rather than later! 8D

THANK YOU FOR READING. c: And I'm really happy you leave awesome and detailed reviews like this. xD It's really nice for someone to focus on my story and be so interested in it. xD YOU'RE AWESOME. <3 But you knew that. And so did I. xD
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  #6  
Old 11-19-2010, 01:21 PM
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Default Re: Howling in the Shadows [PG]

Quote:
8DDDDDDDDDDDD INORITEIT'SSOEXCITEMENT!

xDD I just realised that as I reread it as the quote thing, and thought that, and now I realise I skipped that point while I was editing it earlier, so I missed it. xDD SILLY ME.

Well I hate the 'were' and 'was' thing, because Word says that a pair and a group and a collection would be 'was', even though I would say 'were'. Like, if I was to write "the group were tired", it'd say "the group was tired", since it groups them to be one, almost, and I think it's the same with pairs...unless I didn't double check. xD
YESSITIIIIIIIIIIISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!

Oh, okay. o:

Yeah, that's kind of confusing to me, though I guess since there is one 'group' it would be 'was tired'.


Quote:
Really? o: It's just her being annoyed because they still had the bag. xD

xDDDDDDDDDDDD Yeah, haha, it was supposed to be metaphorical, but now that you mention it, I should say "in pain", shouldn't I? xD
I know, but I meant I had to read over it a few times to figure out what it meant.

Yeah, it's kind of confusing otherwise (then again I'm just not good at understanding metaphors in general).


Quote:
WHY THANK YOU. Pack. x) Thanks! Yeah, haha, they would have, I'd think. I mean, they've seen his pokemon before, since they were previously attacked by him, and yeah--they'd have seen the species before. Oh, well that--it's more that the females are great hunters and fighters (reminds me of lions xD), and, I mean, so are the males, but it's also partly Dusk's opinion, which you have to be aware of. But the other thing is that the hunters and fighters aren't necessarily cut out to be leaders, and aren't capable of making those kinds of decisions--I'm not picking on them or anything, but they do need a strong leader who's large, knows their (in this case, his) place, and can lead a pack. The other thing is inheritance and the fact of being an heir to the pack's "throne", I suppose, and also that the leader needs strong body guards (highly ranked houndour) or similar things, and it's kind of how a king relies on his soldiers to fight for him, type of thing.
Oh, okay, well I don't think it mentioned gligar in the flashback (did it?) so I thought they must have seen one somewhere else or something. Oh, I thought the male and female thing was some sort of pack culture or something (didn't realize it was an opinion. ^^;) Oh, okay, well that makes more sense!

Quote:
Oh, haha, it's one pack. Sorry for the confusion; I didn't make it very clear, did I? xD Later you'll find out that Dusk has a frequent "Scouting Fleet" which she takes care of, being ranked as second in the whole pack. It got confusing because I used "pack" for a group, so I'll change that. xDD

Thanks! 8D Yeah, I thought doing something like that would be interesting. Well that was mainly Eclipse, since he's a bit of a dope sometimes, and Dusk only calls him that to herself. If you notice, he's referred to as "the leader" otherwise. I was contemplating having him as "One", but I stuck with "the leader". =) And yes, it's got to do with rankings. Each houndour earns their title, basically. Yes, haha, Eclipse isn't that interested in being higher ranked than Eight, since he's content with that, and he's not strong enough in a few ways to have his rank heightened anyway. I'll go more into depth in the future. x)
Well, I'm sure it'll go into more detail in the future chapters about the pack, right? Oh, okay, I understand! Yeah, that would make things a lot less confusing.

Oooohhh...I see. I was waiting for one of them to call him "One" and was kind of surprised when Eclipse called him by a name. o: But yeah, calling him "the leader" makes sense and probably is less confusing than if he was called One. Yeah, that makes sense! I'm really glad you didn't do the "lower ranking members have miserable lives" thing and that the pack members do care about each other. I guess the higher up ones just have more privileges and responsibilities? That's better and makes a lot more sense than "I'm a higher rank so I get all the good food/shelter and I can abuse you however much I like har har har," sort of thing. (What annoys me about THAT portrayal of ranks isn't the idea itself, but how nothing really bad ever comes of it, when I would think the lower ranking pokemon would quickly desert or band together and strike back. And the fact that no one in the higher ranks of the pack ever thinks it's wrong for higher ranking members to be mean to the lower ranking ones constantly. o.O)

Quote:
Haha, yeah. YAY FOR QUESTIONS. :D Hehe, Kuchi. I hope I can explain all that soon. Or sometime, anyway. xD When the time is right! I don't know when you'll find that out (what the object is). But it's something simple, and it's also something that's appeared in TtEoaF. xD Haha, thanks! I think I got it from things like the Wolf Brother books, how Wolf depicts things really cutely and creatively, and if he doesn't know what something is he'll fuse two things together that are similar (that's kinda what I tried to do--it's sharp and in a hand - claw - and it's made from metal). Oh, haha, I didn't even realise it was a pokemon attack till I read your comment. xD Well, I knew it was, but I didn't make the connection! xD But no, just because of the appearance. Hahaha, thanks! I thought that would make it funny in the sense that they both think they're the innocent ones, and yeah, that it's typical that the other would do something like that. And it also shows how stereotypical people AND pokemon can be. How the WORLD IS. O_O INTENSE. LIKE CAMPING.
Well, I hope so too! Hm...*can't think of what it could be* Darn it. But I'm still curious as to how it relates to the plot. Oh, okay! Yeah, that makes sense. I like how this pack doesn't have much knowledge of humans. Do they live in some secluded area/pokemon reserve where humans aren't usually allowed to go or something? Yeah, it's ironic, isn't it? INTENSE CAMPING. LIKE SURVIVING IN THE WILDERNESS FOR DAYS WITHOUT SUPPLIES INTENTS.

Quote:
Haha, well I wanted it to be unclear in a sense, because usually things are too obvious in my stories... That's part of the reason you might be getting confused by things--because I realise that in stories not everything should be spelled out, and I kind of wanted people to figure things like that out by themselves. Hahaha, well it's okay, because everything will become clear in chapter two. xD I also thought that if people read this chapter after chapter (since I expect people to start reading while I'm a few chapters in) then they won't get as confused, but because there's only one chapter so far, there are a lot of unanswered questions. xD So you'll have to wait. x)
Oh, well, I guess that makes sense. o: My stories are pretty straightforward I think (I guess they'd be obvious). Yeah, I think that's part of the reason; this is the first chapter and the first introduction to the story, so obviously things are going to make more sense as we read more about the characters and their lifestyle.

Quote:
Yay! 8D I'm so excitement to be writing one. :D Aw, thanks! ^v^ And yeah, haha, you know me--I spend a few chapters setting everything up before I jump into the plot. Thank you! 8D Aw, I'm so glad. xDD I'm also really happy I could get it up today, because I really wanted to show you. x) But you know what's really awesome? HAVING ANSWERS TO THE QUESTIONS YOU ASK. As opposed to you asking things that I have not sorted out yet, and therefore I'd be unable to give you an answer. xDD SO YEAH. It'll probably be a while before I get chapter 2 up, but I'll try to get it up sooner rather than later! 8D

THANK YOU FOR READING. c: And I'm really happy you leave awesome and detailed reviews like this. xD It's really nice for someone to focus on my story and be so interested in it. xD YOU'RE AWESOME. <3 But you knew that. And so did I. xD
I'm glad you are! Yeah, and that's just fine! That's kinda what's going to happen with my other story, because all those events need to happen first. I'm bigly happy too! I BET IT IS AWESOME! Seeeeccccrrrreeeeeetttssssssssssssss.... Well, that's all right-I shall wait excitemently for it! And the TtEoaF chapter! (Were you close to getting done with it? I have a feeling you told me that but I'm not sure..might have been a dream or something. x_x)

YOU'RE BIGLY WELCOME! I'm glad I can leave them! I like stories that make me think about things like this one does! Well, I love when you do it for me so I'm happy to leave long reviews. Well, why wouldn't I be? And thanks! *w*
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  #7  
Old 12-04-2010, 01:00 PM
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Default Re: Howling in the Shadows [PG]

Quote:
Originally Posted by Scytherwolf View Post
YESSITIIIIIIIIIIISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!

Oh, okay. o:

Yeah, that's kind of confusing to me, though I guess since there is one 'group' it would be 'was tired'.

I know, but I meant I had to read over it a few times to figure out what it meant.

Yeah, it's kind of confusing otherwise (then again I'm just not good at understanding metaphors in general).
WOOOOOOOOOOT-HOOOOOOOOOOT!

Yeah, that's how I think it's supposed to be. xD But it's still confusing!

Oh, okay. o: Silly me and my wording. xDD

Haha, well the way you said it made more sense anyway. xD

Quote:
Originally Posted by Scytherwolf View Post
Oh, okay, well I don't think it mentioned gligar in the flashback (did it?) so I thought they must have seen one somewhere else or something. Oh, I thought the male and female thing was some sort of pack culture or something (didn't realize it was an opinion. ^^;) Oh, okay, well that makes more sense!

Well, I'm sure it'll go into more detail in the future chapters about the pack, right? Oh, okay, I understand! Yeah, that would make things a lot less confusing.
Oh, haha, nah, well he sent out his gligar afterwards, but you won't see that yet. x) Haha, a lot of the questions will probably be answered in chapter two. Which I've barely started, but I know what I need to write. ^^ Well it's more like a general statement, and I think I might have been wrong when I said it was her opinion, but I see it as "just the way things are", since females are generally really good hunters.

Yeah, I will. x) Yeah, haha.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Scytherwolf View Post
Oooohhh...I see. I was waiting for one of them to call him "One" and was kind of surprised when Eclipse called him by a name. o: But yeah, calling him "the leader" makes sense and probably is less confusing than if he was called One. Yeah, that makes sense! I'm really glad you didn't do the "lower ranking members have miserable lives" thing and that the pack members do care about each other. I guess the higher up ones just have more privileges and responsibilities? That's better and makes a lot more sense than "I'm a higher rank so I get all the good food/shelter and I can abuse you however much I like har har har," sort of thing. (What annoys me about THAT portrayal of ranks isn't the idea itself, but how nothing really bad ever comes of it, when I would think the lower ranking pokemon would quickly desert or band together and strike back. And the fact that no one in the higher ranks of the pack ever thinks it's wrong for higher ranking members to be mean to the lower ranking ones constantly. o.O)
Well he was going to be, but I stuck with 'the leader'. Yeah, Eclipse is like that. xDD Yeah, I think so too. Though I just thought of something... Oh, I'm sure it'll work out. x) Mm. Oh, well this pack has pretty much been taught to look after each other because they've learned that every pack is not a whole without what makes it up, and therefore they believe all members are important. And truthfully there's another reason they wouldn't belittle others (as you can see, it's the other way around in that Kita tries to bully Dusk xDD), but you'll find that out when I go into more depth regarding pack rankings and all that jazz. But yeah, that does sound weird. O_o You'd think that there'd be some moral or lesson that comes from doing that, but...yeah.

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Originally Posted by Scytherwolf View Post
Well, I hope so too! Hm...*can't think of what it could be* Darn it. But I'm still curious as to how it relates to the plot. Oh, okay! Yeah, that makes sense. I like how this pack doesn't have much knowledge of humans. Do they live in some secluded area/pokemon reserve where humans aren't usually allowed to go or something? Yeah, it's ironic, isn't it? INTENSE CAMPING. LIKE SURVIVING IN THE WILDERNESS FOR DAYS WITHOUT SUPPLIES INTENTS.

Oh, well, I guess that makes sense. o: My stories are pretty straightforward I think (I guess they'd be obvious). Yeah, I think that's part of the reason; this is the first chapter and the first introduction to the story, so obviously things are going to make more sense as we read more about the characters and their lifestyle.
Yay! xDD Oh, well it's something pretty simple. xD I actually didn't mean for it to be so secret, but Dusk didn't know what it was or what it did, so not much about it was mentioned. xD Yeah, it thought it would be interesting if they didn't. Well it's pretty much somewhere that humans barely venture, because I know there are places in the real world that haven't been explored, so I wouldn't know why humans would have been everywhere or even around them at all. And don't forget that it's only Dusk (well, for all we know right now) that hasn't seen humans before, but some may have passed by or something. Yeah, it is. xD VERY INTENTS. SO INTENTS THAT IT'S TOO INTENTS TO SAY ANY MORE!

Yep. x) xD Well mine are too, so I wanted to be a little indirect. But I also mean in terms of the plot--like, yours plots aren't so straightforward, whereas mine tend to be. xD Yeah, that's right. So not much is going to make sense right now unless you're me or have my planning doc (which doesn't have everything down on it anyway xD).

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I'm glad you are! Yeah, and that's just fine! That's kinda what's going to happen with my other story, because all those events need to happen first. I'm bigly happy too! I BET IT IS AWESOME! Seeeeccccrrrreeeeeetttssssssssssssss.... Well, that's all right-I shall wait excitemently for it! And the TtEoaF chapter! (Were you close to getting done with it? I have a feeling you told me that but I'm not sure..might have been a dream or something. x_x)

YOU'RE BIGLY WELCOME! I'm glad I can leave them! I like stories that make me think about things like this one does! Well, I love when you do it for me so I'm happy to leave long reviews. Well, why wouldn't I be? And thanks! *w*
Yay! 8D Cool. Yeah, haha, you have to get all the painful stuff out the way before you can get into the interesting part. xD Or the fun part, anyway. It's inevitable! But it's what helps make a good story, because then your readers understand instead of being confused and feeling like everything's being rushed through. Yeeeeeeeeeessssssssss!! Yay! Excitemently! xDD Oh yeah, haha, I worked on it a tiny bit today (as well as Howling) and I hope to get it finished soon! Hopefully I don't get distracted by the one-shot I started yesterday about something totally unrelated. xD

Me too. xDD Haha, well it's good my stories make you think then. xD xDD Yay for shared long reviews! 8D Good point. xDD (At first I thought you were saying "why wouldn't I be" to me saying that you're awesome. xDDD)

AND SORRY FOR THE LATE REPLY. Dx

~GS

EDIT: Lol?

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Old 12-09-2010, 05:57 PM
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Default Re: Howling in the Shadows [PG]

THE ONLY THINGS I FOUND ARE PROBABLY JUST ME BEING STUPID AND PICKY SO I WON'T MENTION THEM

/breathe

This is so intriguing. ._. I looooove the numbers for names! I remember ages ago my old old friend had a roleplay character called 'Once' and I thought that was brilliant. Not sure why but I like names that are sort of orderly and all... like... collected. xD LIKE THE NUMBERS. OuO

Oooh, one thing though: the Houndour was kept back by the Psychic barrier, and they avoid Psychic attacks? Psychic moves technically would not affect Houndours at all... personally, when my Umbreon character Kyosan was attacked by a psychic move, I'd make it so it sort of shimmered through him forcefully, dissipating into the air. I suppose it'd be like a Pokemon using Tackle on a Ghost type, I'd imagine it flying right through it. xD But that's just me, not sure if you'd agree.

I want to leave a longer comment but this essay that's due in tomorrow is staring at me with narrowed eyes, so I'd better go do it. :c

*stalks thread*
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Old 12-09-2010, 10:46 PM
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Default Re: Howling in the Shadows [PG]

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Originally Posted by Tombi View Post
THE ONLY THINGS I FOUND ARE PROBABLY JUST ME BEING STUPID AND PICKY SO I WON'T MENTION THEM

/breathe

This is so intriguing. ._. I looooove the numbers for names! I remember ages ago my old old friend had a roleplay character called 'Once' and I thought that was brilliant. Not sure why but I like names that are sort of orderly and all... like... collected. xD LIKE THE NUMBERS. OuO
xDD BUT I POINT OUT WEIRD AND STUPID THINGS TOO SO WE'RE EVEN. c:

xDD Thanks! 8D Cool. I wasn't sure what people would think of them, but I'm glad you like 'em. :D Haha, cool. xD Hehe, I know what you mean. 8)

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Oooh, one thing though: the Houndour was kept back by the Psychic barrier, and they avoid Psychic attacks? Psychic moves technically would not affect Houndours at all... personally, when my Umbreon character Kyosan was attacked by a psychic move, I'd make it so it sort of shimmered through him forcefully, dissipating into the air. I suppose it'd be like a Pokemon using Tackle on a Ghost type, I'd imagine it flying right through it. xD But that's just me, not sure if you'd agree.

I want to leave a longer comment but this essay that's due in tomorrow is staring at me with narrowed eyes, so I'd better go do it. :c

*stalks thread*
Well I actually realised after I wrote the part where she (or someone else) avoided a psychic move, but if I changed it it would stuff up the flow or something, so I left it, and I figure it's a mistake on their part. xDD I see barriers as different to damaging attacks and things like waves of psychic energy, so that's why they were kept back by them. o: (xDD When reading that, I came across "Kyosan" and tried to read it as "KYE-oh-san", and I was like "NO! READ IT HOW CAIT SAYS IT!" so that's what I'll try to do from now on. xDD) Bahaha, yeah, I see what you mean. ^^ One of them does get hit by a psychic attack, but yeah...it doesn't do anything. xDD

And yeah, Dusk is the character I'd want you to voice. :3 I just think she'd sound kickass with an English accent. xDD And, of course, your wonderful voice acting. x)

Thanks for pointing it out though. c: Good that you were paying attention! xDD (Something I constantly fail at...) And that's okay. ^^ I hate essays, and getting them out the way is GEWD. 0w0

8D Good luck on your essay, and thank you so much for reading! ^v^
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Old 12-11-2010, 03:30 PM
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Default Re: Howling in the Shadows [PG]

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Originally Posted by Graceful_Suicune View Post


xDD BUT I POINT OUT WEIRD AND STUPID THINGS TOO SO WE'RE EVEN. c:

xDD Thanks! 8D Cool. I wasn't sure what people would think of them, but I'm glad you like 'em. :D Haha, cool. xD Hehe, I know what you mean. 8)
They're not actual mistakes or anything, they're just me being all nitpicky. xD So don't worry.

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Originally Posted by Graceful_Suicune View Post
Well I actually realised after I wrote the part where she (or someone else) avoided a psychic move, but if I changed it it would stuff up the flow or something, so I left it, and I figure it's a mistake on their part. xDD I see barriers as different to damaging attacks and things like waves of psychic energy, so that's why they were kept back by them. o: (xDD When reading that, I came across "Kyosan" and tried to read it as "KYE-oh-san", and I was like "NO! READ IT HOW CAIT SAYS IT!" so that's what I'll try to do from now on. xDD) Bahaha, yeah, I see what you mean. ^^ One of them does get hit by a psychic attack, but yeah...it doesn't do anything. xDD
Yeah, I see. ^^ Sometimes I write stuff that shouldn't really make sense but it works, so I leave it. >> << xD Otherwise it can ruin a whole passage...

And yes, KEE-OH-SAN. D8< xDD It's fine however you read it, it's just that if someone voice-acts for me and calls him Kye-Oh-San, it'd literally be like saying 'Sophie' as 'Sooph-eye'...

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And yeah, Dusk is the character I'd want you to voice. :3 I just think she'd sound kickass with an English accent. xDD And, of course, your wonderful voice acting. x)

Thanks for pointing it out though. c: Good that you were paying attention! xDD (Something I constantly fail at...) And that's okay. ^^ I hate essays, and getting them out the way is GEWD. 0w0

8D Good luck on your essay, and thank you so much for reading! ^v^
XD BUT OF COURSE, ALL VILLAINY TYPES ARE ENGLISH.
Ever notice how it's the Hollywood thing? All heroes are American, all villains are English. It's either because they're still all butthurt over the WWII thing, or they've realised that they can't pull off an evil voice and therefore get the more talented Englishmen to do it. *nose-in-air*

I'd LOVE to her voice. I know I'd be a lot better at darker voices than heroic, goody-goody ones anyway, so I'd have a lot of fun. n___n

Thank you xD I managed it quite quickly and think I've gotten a good grade, not sure yet.
No problem! n__n I shall return!
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Old 12-12-2010, 02:16 PM
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Default Re: Howling in the Shadows [PG]

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XD BUT OF COURSE, ALL VILLAINY TYPES ARE ENGLISH.
Ever notice how it's the Hollywood thing? All heroes are American, all villains are English. It's either because they're still all butthurt over the WWII thing, or they've realised that they can't pull off an evil voice and therefore get the more talented Englishmen to do it. *nose-in-air*
*barrels in out of nowhere* I TAKE OFFENSE TO THAT.

....

.../cannot keep straight face

But, anyway. YAY! I'm reading a fic of yours, GS. GO ME! /it's just a chapter long Doodle, get over it

But, uh, I like it. I won't crit like spelling errors, because I like never notice them. But in the last scene, I didn't even realize that it was a flashback. So yeah, I was like 'what is going on?' But it's cool! KEEP WRITING! GOGOGOGO /slapp'd
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Old 12-12-2010, 11:59 PM
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Default Re: Howling in the Shadows [PG]

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Originally Posted by Tombi View Post
They're not actual mistakes or anything, they're just me being all nitpicky. xD So don't worry.

Yeah, I see. ^^ Sometimes I write stuff that shouldn't really make sense but it works, so I leave it. >> << xD Otherwise it can ruin a whole passage...

And yes, KEE-OH-SAN. D8< xDD It's fine however you read it, it's just that if someone voice-acts for me and calls him Kye-Oh-San, it'd literally be like saying 'Sophie' as 'Sooph-eye'...
Oh, okay. xD

Yeah, haha, that's exactly right. And the flow is definitely important!

I know, but reading it in the wrong way gets me into bad habits. xDD But in that clip you recorded of the pronunciation of names, you say it's said like: "KOY-a-san". o: Haha, Soopheye. xD

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tombi View Post
XD BUT OF COURSE, ALL VILLAINY TYPES ARE ENGLISH.
Ever notice how it's the Hollywood thing? All heroes are American, all villains are English. It's either because they're still all butthurt over the WWII thing, or they've realised that they can't pull off an evil voice and therefore get the more talented Englishmen to do it. *nose-in-air*

I'd LOVE to her voice. I know I'd be a lot better at darker voices than heroic, goody-goody ones anyway, so I'd have a lot of fun. n___n

Thank you xD I managed it quite quickly and think I've gotten a good grade, not sure yet.
No problem! n__n I shall return!
D: But wait... Dusk isn't a villain! Dx She isn't a villainy type either. xD She's only portrayed as a villain by the humans. xDD She thinks they are the villains. xD At the moment (in the story, I mean) there's actually no (known) villain yet. xD
Haha, yes, I do notice that, actually. xDD Well Dusty's not American. xDD Only because I always imagined she was Australian, since she resembles me in more ways than one, and...for other reasons. x3

Yay. :3 I'd love you to voice her too. xDD Though I think I'll wait for a good scene before that happens. ^^ I think I'd like to do Kita. xDD I imagine for Kuchi and Tau to be American, though.

No worries! :D Oh, cool, that's good. ^^ HOPE YOU DO WELL. c: And yay for returning. xD

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Originally Posted by Doodlebop View Post
*barrels in out of nowhere* I TAKE OFFENSE TO THAT.

....

.../cannot keep straight face

But, anyway. YAY! I'm reading a fic of yours, GS. GO ME! /it's just a chapter long Doodle, get over it

But, uh, I like it. I won't crit like spelling errors, because I like never notice them. But in the last scene, I didn't even realize that it was a flashback. So yeah, I was like 'what is going on?' But it's cool! KEEP WRITING! GOGOGOGO /slapp'd
xDDDDDDDDDD I love that image of you "barrelling". xDD *imagines you rolling into our conversation in a barrel*

Yay! 8D That is excitement. xDD At first I thought you were saying my story was a "chapter long doodle", implying that it was some kind of draft for a properly written version or something. xDDD I was about to ask why!

Thank you. ^^ Haha, that's okay. I love if people theorise or talk about characters or...whatever. I just love to know that they read it. ^v^ I'm so excited that three people are reading this already, though. xDD Thanks, guys! 8D And yeah, haha, I actually meant for that to be confusing and non-flashback-like. It's kinda funny to watch people go "...Huh? Where am I? Why--huh?" until they go "OOHHHH!!!! *relieved face* I get it now." xDD THANK YOU I WILL. c:

I need to get a picture done soon. xD

~GS.
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Last edited by Graceful_Suicune; 12-13-2010 at 12:05 AM.
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Old 12-13-2010, 02:06 PM
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Default Re: Howling in the Shadows [PG]

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xDDDDDDDDDD I love that image of you "barrelling". xDD *imagines you rolling into our conversation in a barrel*

Yay! 8D That is excitement. xDD At first I thought you were saying my story was a "chapter long doodle", implying that it was some kind of draft for a properly written version or something. xDDD I was about to ask why!

Thank you. ^^ Haha, that's okay. I love if people theorise or talk about characters or...whatever. I just love to know that they read it. ^v^ I'm so excited that three people are reading this already, though. xDD Thanks, guys! 8D And yeah, haha, I actually meant for that to be confusing and non-flashback-like. It's kinda funny to watch people go "...Huh? Where am I? Why--huh?" until they go "OOHHHH!!!! *relieved face* I get it now." xDD THANK YOU I WILL. c:

I need to get a picture done soon. xD

~GS.
Yupyupyup. But now I can't get out of it. *rolls around on the floor*

Ooops, I forgot to include a punctuation mark. xD I meant to say... like... I dunno. BUT YEAH. EXCITEMENT. This fairly obvious, because I'm having difficulty forming a coherent sentence. xD

OH! *waves hand* I'LL DRAW A PICTURE. Not that anyone cares or anything! Or I could make you a spiffy banner! I dunno. I could do something!
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Old 12-14-2010, 10:39 AM
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Default Re: Howling in the Shadows [PG]

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Yupyupyup. But now I can't get out of it. *rolls around on the floor*

Ooops, I forgot to include a punctuation mark. xD I meant to say... like... I dunno. BUT YEAH. EXCITEMENT. This fairly obvious, because I'm having difficulty forming a coherent sentence. xD

OH! *waves hand* I'LL DRAW A PICTURE. Not that anyone cares or anything! Or I could make you a spiffy banner! I dunno. I could do something!
xDDDD Good luck! *hits barrel with spoon*

xDD That's okay, I got what you meant. xD Yeah. x) YES VERY EXCITEMENT. xDDD Baha, nice.

OH THAT WOULD BE AWESOME. c: Of course I care. xDDD I'd love for you to make me a banner! :D Though I'd have to draw some houndour first. xD Because I wouldn't want you to use other pictures of them. OR. I'd love to see some houndour from you. 8D Maybe you could draw one and I could draw one, and then you could put them together in a banner or something. xDD

~GS.
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