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Creative Writing Share your fan fiction, stories, poems, essays, editorials, song lyrics, or any other related written work. All written must be your creation. Start a new thread, and keep replying to that thread as you add on more chapters. Anyone can join in at anytime.


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  #1  
Old 12-10-2005, 09:42 PM
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Default Plushies O' DOOM! (One Piece humor fic)

Well, I've finally gotten around to writing a One Piece fanfic! *Cheers and hands out cookies to everyone.* Now, the chapters are pretty short, though there will be at least five of them (one for each char), and since they're short you can expect the next one to be up within a few days! Now then, sit back and enjoy this strangeness pulled from my mind!




“Plushies O’ DOOM!”

***

There exists a land, somewhere far away, where plushies rule the day, and the world. These plushies come in all shapes and sizes, and they can appear anywhere…

~~~

Chapter One: Nami’s Misfortune At Having To Go First

~~~

It was an early, peaceful Saturday morning aboard the Going Merry, with sea birds cawing for food and fishes jumping. But this peace was not to last as it was shattered by a shrill scream (which happened to have a variety of effects on the other members of the Going Merry).

Nami (the navigator and hot-tempered one of the crew) was the screamer, and the pitch at which she screamed caused the plate she was cleaning to explode. Sanji (the kick-happy cook) ended up dropping his cigarette into the curry he was making, and thus nearly had a heart attack as he sobbed over the ruined culinary perfection. Zoro (the swordsman) was busy polishing one of his swords, which conveniently found a new sheathe in his side. Usopp (the marksman and official wussy-man of the group) gave a shriek and proceeded to lock himself in the only bathroom on the ship. And Rufi (the rubbery, stretchy captain of this strange lot) merely thought the scream meant they were out of meat, and promptly let out a scream himself before passing out from grief and shock (after all, the guy loves his meat).

Thus, no one came to help Nami, who was standing amidst exploded-plate remains and staring in horror at the little Barney plushie, which was dancing and singing, “I Love You” without end.

“It’s…so wrong!” she moaned as the Barney plushie suddenly stopped its singing and dancing. Slowly it turned to face her, wearing that freaky, God-scaring, retarded, “smack me with a stupid stick” smile the “real” Barney had been created with.

“Naaaaamiiiiiiii…” it called in a happy sing-song voice, holding its little arms out and toddling towards her like a young child learning how to walk. The young thief quickly backed away from it, horror-struck, as the little plush came closer. “I looooove yoooouuuu, Nami. Do you love me?”

“Stay back!” Nami shrieked as she looked around for something to defend herself with (as her pole-stick-pokey-long-thing of stickness was curiously gone). Spotting a rather large hammer (and I do mean rather large, in fact it was so large as to make people go, “WOW, that’s a rather large hammer!”) conveniently leaning against the wall she just happened to be moving towards, she spared only a second to exclaim, “Holy jumpin’ jelleh beans tha’s a BIG hammah!” and another to ponder over the fact that the nails it was used on must be big as well before turning to it, leaping like a frog with three legs missing to it, and lifting it.

Despite its considerable size, though, the hammer weighed next to nothing, for it was made of paper! Though Nami didn’t know it, this paper hammer was here because of Zoro’s hidden obsession: origami! (Yes indeed, not only was Roronoa a demon when it came to wielding swords, he was also an accomplished paper folder!) However, had Nami known this huge paper wonder was Zoro’s doing, she may have realized it was he who kept putting paper bunnies (which she hated), paper flowers (to which she had randomly become highly allergic), and paper bathtubs (which she found offensive for no reason whatsoever) in her bedroom everyday.

ANYWHO, all this time the Barney plushie was stalking after Nami, arms out like a zombie as it repeated, “HOLD ME!” in an increasingly high voice. Without a moment’s thought, the young woman chucked the origami hammer at the little purple plush, which was hit and made, for some reason, to fall over and then explode into flames.

“WOW!” Nami cried, looking all sparkly as she clapped her hands together. “How come whenever I hit Sanji with hammers he doesn’t explode into flames?” As she pondered this miracle, she didn’t notice the Barney plushie standing up, still smiling even though its right eye was twitching and it was still a-toastin’.

“You know, it’s not nice to hit people with hammers and then make them catch fire. In fact, it tends to make people VERY VERY ANGRY!!!” Nami gave a shriek (well, more like a squeak to be honest) as the Barney plushie’s head grew to nearly ten times its normal size and its eyes went all scary and flamey, anime-style, and its teeth became fangs as it grew twisty demon horns and wings.

“HOLY SWEET AND SOUR SAUCER ON A FRIDAY AFTERNOON DURING TEA TIME, BATDUDE!!!” Nami cried out as she turned and fled outside onto the deck, with the mongo-jumbo-headed, flamey-eyed, fangified and horned and winged Barney plush stomping after her.

“NOW YOU MUST SUFFER MY PURPLY WRATH OF PLUSHFULLNESS!!!” bellowed the big-headed toy as Nami tripped over nothing (nothingness always like to trip people at the worst time, it’s a fact not many people know, and a strange occurrence of nature) and landed with a SPLAT (because THUD was out for lunch at the moment despite the fact it was still morning) on her face. The Barney plushie behind her laughed with triumph at it made its way to her.

“Nuuuuuu!!!” Nami cried as she rolled away, trying to avoid the Barney plushie, before stopping and wondering why she was rolling away (though it didn’t occur to her to wonder why she was rolling in the first place) from a toy when she had been a champion soccer player back before she’d joined Arlong’s crew. And so she leapt to her feet and turned to face the Barney plushie, with all its giant-noggin’ed’ness and still roastingness, as it tromped towards her.

“Ready to give in to my LOVE?!” it said as its right arm suddenly fell off and then turned to ash. “Aaahhh poo…”

“Love THIS!!” Nami answered as she ran at the plush, stopping within half an inch of it and pulling her leg back. Letting loose a battle cry that sounded something like “WHAZZADIGGLEWHITCHATA,” she brought her foot swinging down and nailed the li’l purple toy in the left eye. There was a satisfying CLACK sound (as FWUMP was also out, having had a dentist appointment that morning) as her foot connected with the dolly-thing before it went flying.

“All I wanted was to rule the woooorrrrlllllld!” it sobbed as it flew away into the sky and soon turned into a star.

And thus Nami celebrated by dancing the Macarena nonstop for three hours.

~~~


Yes, short and with mucho randomosity thrown in! *Skips off to write the next chapter as Nami continues to dance.*

EDIT: Reviews are loved and welcomed! ^^
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Last edited by Dog of Hellsing; 12-10-2005 at 10:20 PM.
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  #2  
Old 12-10-2005, 10:33 PM
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Default Re: Plushies O' DOOM! (One Piece humor fic)

One Peice Humor Fics= I love them! Put this on fanfiction.net... or did you already... i might have seen this....

Anyway great and hilarious!

I have an idea for a A non humorous One Piece fic..... which means it will eat at my brain untill I try to write it and fail....

But Bravo!

Note that I like Rufi's dubbed name better....

But who cares.... l and r are interchangeable.
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Old 12-10-2005, 11:38 PM
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Default Re: Plushies O' DOOM! (One Piece humor fic)

~Grabs cookie~ LOL THIS IS GREAT! I LOVED IT AND CAN'T WAIT FOR THE NEXT ONE. ALSO, I WANTANOTHER COOKIE I FINISHED THIS ONE!
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Old 12-12-2005, 06:11 PM
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Default Re: Plushies O' DOOM! (One Piece humor fic)

Hey Pika, I'd be happy to help you with the fic you mentioned ^^. What kinda fic is it, humor, horror, something else? And since you mentioned preferring Rufi's dubbed name, I've decided to throw in some name-fun for his chapter.

I'm working on chapter two now, hopefully you'll enjoy it as much as chapter one.
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Old 12-19-2005, 11:09 PM
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Post Re: Plushies O' DOOM! (One Piece humor fic)

thats funny. i like it. no, i love it!
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