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Stories Write a story to catch Pokemon. A Grader will then decide if it catches or not.


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  #1  
Old 01-17-2007, 02:35 AM
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Default Through the Cats Eyes

=^^= When was the last time I wrote one of these?

Through the Cats Eyes
Ch.1 ~Separation~

As the moon lay high up in the sky, lighting the world with a dim amount of light bright enough to keep the darkness from fully taking over, I laid next to a burning fire. It flickered back and forth as it lit the surrounding area. Next to me sat a girl about sixteen years old. She had long, brown hair and wore goggles on her head. Her shirt was a tan color with the word ‘NYA’ written on the front of it in brown. She had on short blue jeans that were ripped at the ends of the legs. Her shoes……well those aren’t important. What is important is that this was my trainer and her name is Rocket Zater. My name…..mine is Coin and I’m her starter Pokemon. Usually you’d see the starter as being a Cyndaquil, Mudkip, Bulbasaur or any other of those guys but not me. I’m a Meowth and a Meowth I shall stay. The reason why is because Rocket and I have a goal. That goal is to prove that a Meowth doesn’t have to evolve to be powerful and so far, we’re not doing too badly. My record is better then we could have ever hoped and I have gotten really strong. The only thing hat’s truly standing in our way right now is Rocket’s mother. She hates me and wants to get rid of me any way she can (even if that means killing me) and then force Rocket to go back with her to Orre and continue her studies so she can become a nurse. We’ve been running from her for almost a year now and each time it’s gotten harder and harder. I fear that one day she’ll succeed.

“Coin are you okay?” asked my trainer as she looked down at me. She was worried about me because I had been in such deep thought about the mistress (her mother) actually succeeding in her attempts to separate us. I looked up at Rocket and smiled.

“I’m fine Rocket. No worries,” I replied as I smiled. Rocket pat my head and chuckled a bit.

“That’s good to hear Coin. Now let’s get some sleep. We will need our energy if we are ever going to capture any more Pokemon.” Rocket then lay down and placed her hands behind her head. “The stars are so beautiful tonight aren’t they?” Her voice was quiet and calm. She sounded like she didn’t have a single worry in the world.

“They do,” I replied happily as I looked up to them. I watched as they twinkled in the dark sky, filling it up with hope. I then laid my head onto the ground and soon fell into a deep sleep. My trainer smiled and did the same thing.

Hours had now past as we slept quietly. The fire was now out and the stars never looked more alive as they danced in the sky. My ears twitched and I slowly opened my eyes. I let out a yawn and got onto my paws. I began to stretch, extending my claws and then retracting them.

“Thirsty,” I quietly said still half asleep. There was a river near us so I began to walk to it. My eyes were shut, my head lowered, my ears and tail drooped, and I was starting to fall back to sleep. I slowly opened my eye lids, which felt like anvils by the way, to see where I was going so I wouldn’t run into any trees. I made it to the river and sat down to get a drink. As I lapped up the water with my rough tongue, I heard something. My ears twitched and my eyes were now fully open. I stopped lapping up the water as I listened to noise. Slowly getting louder and louder, it echoed through my mind. Flapping. The familiar sound of flapping wings. I could never forget that flapping no matter how hard I tried.

“Zation,” I said to myself in sheer terror. I was now fully awake and filled with terror. I quickly jumped back from the river, turned around and darted back to Rocket. I looked back as I ran and I saw him! It was Zation! I had to move quickly! “ROCKET! ROCKET WAKE UP!” I screeched. I made it back to see her still asleep. I did that only thing I could and ran right into her.

“What the heck!” she screamed as she awoke startled. She looked down at me and spoke. “Coin, what the heck do you think you’re doing?!”

“ZATION!” I screamed as I pointed to where I was running from. Rocket looked up and saw nothing. That is, until the orange dragon came flapping over the horizon breathing fire. Rocket quickly got to her feet and backed up. She fell back onto her butt and stared in terror at the Charizard that was now flapping in place in front of us. A woman jumped off of the dragon’s back and folded her arms. She looked a bit more heavy set then Rocket, had dark brown hair wrapped up in a bun and had on a brown shirt with black pants.

“Mother,” Rocket said terrified.

“Thought you could run from me forever did you? Well I think not. You’re coming home now and that thing that you chose as a starter will no longer be with you. Zation, take care of that Meowth for mommy,” she said as she looked to her Charizard. The Charizard grinned an evil grin and growled in response.

“Gladly.” Is what he had said.

“Coin run!” Rocket screamed as she looked at me. I looked over at her, then at Zation, then back to her until I finally turned around and ran. Zation roared out loudly and flapped his wings. He then shot forward with great speed leaving Rocket and the mistress behind. I ran as fast as I could and made a sharp turn into some bushes. I burst out of them and began swerving through the forest. I figured that Zation wouldn’t be able to follow me due to his size but, I was dead wrong. Zation took the hit of the trees as he flew after me. He was a ruthless Charizard that should have never even been allowed to live. He loved to watch pain and he loved to attack those weaker then him. I ran and ran until the forest had finally ended. There were no longer any trees to act as obstacles and Zation was now able to pick up speed and gain up on me. I had no clue what was happening with Rocket and the mistress but, I knew that I couldn’t run forever. It was time to fight. I spun around and lashed out a wave of Thunderbolts right at Zation. He laughed and made sharp turns to dodge every attempt. I then created a ball of water in front of me, jumped up and spun around, smashed it into the ground and then fell onto my paws. I slid a bit and then made a sharp turn and faced the direction I was facing before. Water exploded out of the ground and smashed right into Zation dealing damage and making him crash into the ground. I laughed as I ran because he was still dumb enough to fall for that water attack. I then noticed something. The sky no longer had stars in it. The sun had started to come up!

“Oh no! Rocket!” I said as I slid to a stop. I turned around and began to head back but, something was wrong. Nothing looked familiar. My ears lowered and my eyes widened. “Oh no….no no no. No! ROCKET! ROCKET WHERE ARE YOU?! ROCKET PLEASE ANSWER! ROCKET!” I exclaimed over and over in pure terror. I was lost! I couldn’t remember the way I had come and Zation was also chasing me! What if the mistress succeeded! What if I was never going to see Rocket again?! I had to get out of this forest! I had to! All this had happened so fast and it was scaring me more and more. It felt like not even a few minutes ago that Rocket and I had fallen asleep. I was in serious trouble now.
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Last edited by RocketMeowth; 04-05-2007 at 06:32 PM.
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  #2  
Old 01-17-2007, 03:43 AM
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Default Re: Through the Cats Eyes

Ch.2 ~Future Bird~

I backed up a bit, my ears now pressed against my head as I frantically looked around for any signs of a familiar sight or of Zation. I couldn’t understand why it is that nothing looked familiar! I then heard a voice up in a tree. I slowly turned around, hoping that Zation wasn’t pulling some kind of trick on me. What I saw wasn’t Zation but was a very tiny green bird. It had red feet, a red tail and a red feather sticking up off the top of its head. Its beak and wings were yellow and it bounced when it moved.

“Excuse me. How do you get out of here? Nothing looks familiar and I’m really scared!” I cried as I looked at the bird. The bird looked over at me and laughed. Its voice had a high pitched, kind of annoying tone to it.

“You must be crazy to think that I, Nellie Certa Unina, would help a cat like you! You’re just trying to trick me into coming down there so you can eat me. Well good luck with that Mr. Cat because I may be a young female Natu but, I am not stupid!” The Natu then stuck her tongue out at me and turned around. She had no interest in helping me out. I then did what no cat would do unless it was an emergency. I pleaded for her help.

“Please Nellie! Please help me! I am being chased by a Charizard and I don’t want to get any more lost then I already am! Please!” I began to cry because I kept getting the thought of the mistress dragging Rocket by her hair off back to Orre. Nellie turned and looked at me. She began to laugh hysterically at my pleas for her help.

“Why are you, a cat, begging and crying for help from me, a bird? Do you have a few screws lose or what!?” she asked as she laughed more. “Also, you’re a very bad liar. Charizard don’t live in this place. If you’re going to try and trick me then please, trick me properly.”

“I found you! You thought you could get away from me but oh were you wrong! Now my little friend, this has been fun and all but I have a job to do. So get ready to die you worthless cat!” I quickly turned around to see Zation behind me. His wings were folded in and he looked infuriated. Saliva was dripping from his jaws as he stared at me. Nellie saw him and just stood there staring with her beak wide open.

“We’ve never had a Charizard in the Labyrinth Forest before! My gosh cat you were speaking the truth!” Nellie exclaimed as she looked down at me.

“Well duh you stupid bird! I don’t lie! And now I am going to have to fight this thing!” I screamed back as I stared at Zation. I knew not to take my eyes off him for if I did, he would make the first strike as fast as lightning and I’d stand no chance of even getting in one hit! I took in a deep breath and slowly let it out. I then started the fight off with a Double Team attack to try and boost my evasiveness. Zation wasn’t startled by the attack and easily picked me out from my copies. He burst forward, made his tail glow and spun around smashing it directly into the side of my head sending me flying into the nearby tree that Nellie was in. Nellie began to lose her balance and soon fell onto the ground behind me. She jumped onto her feet and bounced up and down.

“What cheap parlor tricks! My owner taught me how to figure out which was the real one in just seconds! That attack is literally pointless to use against me because it’ll only get you hurt!” Zation exclaimed as he began to laugh hysterically. I got onto my paws and stared at him. He stopped laughing and stared at me with a grin on his face. He crossed his arms and sighed. “I’m waiting feline.” I burst forward towards him and charged at full speed. I then vanished from sight which actually startled Zation a bit. “Where’d that pathetic feline go?” He asked as he unfolded his arms and looked around for me.

“Right here!” I yelled as I repapered right next to his head and smashed my entire body into the side of his head at full speed. It was my Fake Out attack and it worked! Zation fell onto his right side and felt a surge of pain shoot through his thick skull. I also felt a small jolt of pain surge through my body after I landed on the ground.

“No one does that to me!” Zation screamed out in rage. He then opened his mouth and shot a Flamethrower right at me! I had no time to doge and I took the flames head on. The burned my fur and caused an extremely large deal of damage. I had no choice but to screech out in tremendous and what seemed to be endless pain. Nellie saw this and became infuriated. It’s not that she was concerned for me; it was that she hated to see others being hurt.

“Take this!” She then shot two dark beams of energy out from her eyes which hit Zation’s head and dealt some damage. Zation stopped the Flamethrower and winced in pain from the attack. He growled and got back onto his feet. He looked to Nellie and let out a roar that was both damaging to the ears and intimidating.

“How dare you you little ingrate of a bird! I am going to make you wish you were never born!” He then lashed forward and grabbed Nellie before she even had a chance to get out of the way. I had to admit, for a Charizard, his speed was almost as fast as a Raichu’s was! He had been trained well by the mistress. He had Nellie in the grasp of his claw and grinned as he stared at her. She struggled to break free but was unsuccessful. He then began to squeeze tightly. Nellie felt as if he was crushing her bones. She couldn’t even scream because the pain was just too great.

“Leave her alone!” I exclaimed as I shot a Shadow Ball at Zation. The ball of pure dark energy smashed into Zation’s spine and caused him to widen his eyes and release fire as he roared in incredible pain. He let Nellie go and he quickly looked over to me. “Uh-oh,” I said as I looked at his eyes. I could see pure rage and anger in them and I could immediately tell that, well, Zation was no longer going to play around. He turned around, faced me and flapped his wings. He lifted himself up off the ground and then dropped back down. He smashed onto the ground with incredible force, causing an Earthquake attack to form! He then lifted his head back and shot it forward releasing an Overheat attack! I quickly tried to dodge the Earthquake attack but I tripped as the ground shook beneath me. I then fell victim to the immense amount of energy that had fire swirling around it. It sent me flying back towards a rock and I was smashed against it.

“DIE!” Zation screamed out as he flapped his wings, lifted himself into the air, and shot forward at tremendous speed. I tried to get off the rock but the attack had literally pushed me through it a bit! I was in tremendous pain but I had to get out before Zation smashed his jaws into me and crushed me in half! Nellie got back onto her claws and saw Zation heading right for me. She then used a Teleport attack and appeared in front of me.

“Nellie!” I exclaimed as I saw her flapping there. I watched as she used the last of her strength to send out a Night Shade attack which hit Zation directly in the eyes! Zation screamed out in pain as the beams of dark energy hit his eyes while they were still open. He immediately stopped charging forward and backed up from the attack to try and escape it. Nellie stopped the Night Shade attack and then flew onto Zation’s face.

“I can’t see! What did you do to me you inferior bird?!” Zation screamed out as he began to violently move his head back and forth. Nellie was using all her strength to stay on his face as she dealt Peck after Peck. I finally got free and fell to the ground. It was hard for me to stay on my feet but I managed. I then created a ball of water and smashed it into the ground. Water once again exploded from it and hit Zation’s tail flame! The fire nearly went out and it terrified him! If there was ANYTHING that scared a Charizard more then a Rock Pokemon, it was their tail flame going out. Zation burst forward and flew as fast as he could away from me. Nellie teleported herself off his face and to my side. I fell back onto my stomach and Nellie fell onto her butt. We could no longer stay on our feet and we were both on the verge of fainting.

“I’m going to use Wish to heal us both. Now that I’ve seen you fight and that you would even help me, I know I can trust you. For no cat would even risk themselves in a battle to save a bird like you did earlier. I thank you very much. Maybe when we are fully healed, I can help you get out of this place.” Nellie’s voice was weak and sounded tired. I nodded and told her that I’d like that very much. She smiled and used her Wish attack. It wouldn’t be long now until both of us were back to our full health.
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  #3  
Old 01-18-2007, 04:16 AM
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Default Re: Through the Cats Eyes

Ch.3 ~Fighting the Future~

It wasn’t long before both Nellie and I were healed. We felt better then ever and were quickly back onto our feet. I looked at Nellie and thanked her greatly for using her Wish attack to heal me back to full health.

”Oh no problem. It was my pleasure. A cat as nice as you shouldn’t have to wander around this place all injured like that.” she happily replied as she closed her eyes, tilted her head and smiled. She seemed like the type who could easily put their trust in someone even if they hardly know them.

“Oh, earlier you said that this place was called the Labyrinth Forest right?” I asked. Nellie nodded and asked me why I had asked her that. “Well, what’s that mean? Is it just a creative name or,” I paused as Nellie nodded and began to speak.

”This place is called the Labyrinth Forest because, it’s literally a labyrinth! It changes all the time which is probably why you don’t recognize any of your surroundings. It’s because the forest shifted again and took you and even that Charizard with it. No one knows how this forest is able to do that but it does.” Nellie was staring up at the tree she was in earlier and then looked over to all the other trees that were behind us. She sighed and then looked back at me. ”A lot of the time when the forest changes like that, the result of the change can sometimes be fairly awkward. For instance, there is a forest right there behind us, where you came through. This place is supposed to be a clearing but it has one tree in it which well, looks odd. This forest is very hard to describe actually and, it’s very hard to live in. Unfortunately, I don’t know how to get to the exit. I know how to get through certain parts of it but, not to the exit.”

“Can’t you just fly up and out of this forest?” I asked as I looked at her. She looked to the grass, her eyes now filled with sadness. She slowly shut them and softly spoke.

”No. For some reason, no Pokemon can fly in or out of this place. It’s like there is a barrier blocking us flying Pokemon from escaping or something. Because of that the only exit is the one that you non flyers use.” Nellie looked so upset when she said that. I felt upset to. My ears lowered down and a sigh escaped my mouth as I sat on the grass.

“That’s so sad,” I quietly said as I looked at her. I then thought of something that immediately cheered me up. My ears perked up and a large smile placed itself upon my tan face. “You should join up with me!” I exclaimed.

”Excuse me?” Nellie had a confused look on her face as she looked up at me.

“Yeah yeah! Together we can get out of this forest! You can see the world and I can find Rocket! It’s perfect!” I exclaimed as I jumped up with joy.

”Hold up cat hold up! Who said I was going to join you?! Sure I would love to get out of this place but, I won’t just join up with you. You’ve got to prove to me that I should. I don’t want to join someone who just got lucky with that Charizard and is in fact really weak. I want to join up with someone who survived that Charizard because they were powerful! So c’mon cat, we battle for the decision on if I’ll join up. You win, and I just may join but, if I win, you find someone else got it?” Nellie knew what she was talking about and she already knew my answer. I grinned and lifted my head with confidence.

“You’ve got yourself a fight bird! And let me warn you, that wasn’t luck back there. That was my power and there’s way more where that came from!” My confidence was high and I felt like I had the advantage with my electrical attacks. Nellie laughed and unfolded her wings. She flapped them and lifted herself into the air.

“Then lets go!” she exclaimed. With that our battle was on! I lowered myself into a pouncing position and jumped up into the air. I then vanished from sight! Nellie quickly closed her eyes for a few seconds. She re-opened them and jolted forward RIGHT as I re-appeared and bolted towards where she previously was. I missed her and landed back on the ground on my feet. I looked over to where she was, confused about why my Fake Out attack missed.

“Hey bird, why is it that Fake Out, which never misses, missed when I attempted it on you?!” I exclaimed confused and a bit angry. Nellie laughed hysterically as she struggled to keep herself in the air.

“You don’t know!? Natu and Xatu all have the innate ability to see into the future! I can predict your next move, how you’ll use it, where you’ll attack from and even any strategy you may think of before you have any clue as to what to do! You’re in serious trouble my friend if you think that you’re going to defeat me easily. With this ability of mine, you’re going to have an extremely hard time even landing one paw on me! Plus, I’m flying! You can’t hit what you can’t reach AND, you can’t defeat the future!” Nellie laughed again and then shot a Night Shade at me. I quickly jumped to the side barely dodging the dark rays. I then used an Aerial Ace to boost my speed to try and gain an advantage. Nellie watched as I used the speed I gained from the attack to run in a circle around her. She closed her eyes for a few seconds like before, re-opened them and ginned. Electricity shot out from my body and quickly shot up and created a tornado of electricity around Nellie. Nellie glowed for a second and vanished into thin air. I slid to a stop, cut the electricity and looked around.

“Drat she did it again! How am I going to defeat her if she keeps predicting all my moves!?” I said to myself frustrated.

“You can’t!” Nellie appeared in front of me and then vanished again. I quickly looked around to se where she would re-appear next. ”Also, you cats think too much! You don’t just go for it you always think! Think think think think think that’s all you do! My gosh cat I bet you could get in five attacks with the amount of thinking you do!” I listened as Nellie began to rant about me and other cats. It was really starting to get on my nerves.

“Wait, that’s it!” I looked up at Nellie to see her still ranting. I grinned, rolled my eyes and sent a Thunderbolt her way.

”You think too much!” Nellie said as she smiled. She looked over at me only to see a large volt of electricity coming right for her! She tried to react but the volt was too close and it hit her directly dealing a large amount of damage.

“And you talk too much!” I yelled to her. I then jolted forward and combined an Aerial Ace attack with Fury Swipes! I jumped up, smashed into Nellie and then sliced her up to four times with my claws. She fell to the ground with scratch marks all over her tiny body. I landed in front of her, nearly out of breath. She just lay there looking fainted. I figured that I had won and so I let my guard down. I sighed, sat down and yawned. But, what I wasn’t expecting was my body to start glowing!

“Wait, what the, what’s going on?!” I said as I was lifted higher and higher into the air. Nellie opened her eyes which were glowing a blue color like the light surrounding my body was. It was a Psychic attack! It couldn’t have been anything else!

“You thought you beat me! I predicted it so I played a trick on you! And you fell for it just like I knew you would!” Nellie exclaimed as she got onto her claws and folded in her wings. She then looked over to the tree and flung me into it. She then flung me into the ground and back into the tree. Sharp pains surged through my body as I fell back to the ground when Nellie released me from the psychic grasp she had on me. I slowly pushed myself to my feet and watched as Nellie began to laugh again. This was my final chance. I had no other choice if I wanted to beat her. I ruffled my fur and then shot a volt of electricity larger then before directly at Nellie. It wasn’t a Thunderbolt. This time, it was a Thunder attack and I had to make it hit! Nellie turned around only to see the electricity hit her directly! The power from the attack, added with the damage she had already taken as well as it being super effective was too much for her. She fell to the ground, fainted. I slowly got onto my feet and let out a chuckle of relief.

“I did it. I won,” I said in a weak and exhausted voice. My ears then perked as I heard something. Before I could even turn to see what it was, a ball of immense energy smashed into my side hurdling me to the ground and knocking me out. The match ended in a stale mate. A few minutes later the both of us slowly emerged back onto our feet.

“So Nellie...I won,” I weakly said. Nellie smiled as she took slow and heavy breaths of air.

”You sure did. That was a fun battle,” Nellie said as she looked at me. We both had a lot of scratch marks and bruises all over our bodies from the attacks we unleashed on one another.

“Well Nellie…you gonna join up with me?” I asked her curiously.

~~~~~~
Ready for grading.
Now, to whoever grades this, this is how I would like you to grade it.

The Pokemon (if successful) will not be captured. She'll (and any others) will just join up with Coin and help him get through the forest. The real capture battle will be at the end of this story. But I still need your approval on if the Pokemon joins up with Coin or not.

:P Yeah I know, this might seem confusing and pointless but, if I didn't do it this way, it would take forever to get a Pokemon and I doubt you'd want to read up to ten chapters or something like that for most likely three Pokemon.

Just think of this as a capture but without the actuall capture. And thus ends my explination. Hope I wasn't being repetitive.

Also, I have no clue how long a story has to be for a Natu. :P
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  #4  
Old 01-18-2007, 07:51 PM
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Default Re: Through the Cats Eyes (ready for a grader)

Story: Aww the start was lovely how Coin said it lol. Evil mother trying to get rid of Coin :[
I liked the bond Coin had with its trainer that was nice ^_^
Some of the characteristics you used reminded me of you lol

Detail:
It was good, but every story can use some more. Other than that it was good.

Grammar: Commas missed that MS Word might not pick up. XD

Quote:
Originally Posted by You
Nellie opened her eyes which were glowing
Quote:
Originally Posted by Me
Nellie opened her eyes, which were glowing
I added the comma before which :P
Having things like: Think think think and over again were weird lol but were readable.

Length: Perfect for a Natu.

Reality:
Yes, i could see this happening.

Battle: I liked the battle. It reminded me of like Pokemon Mystery Dungeon which is a nice change to see than regular stories ^_^
Good Detail here.

Outcome: Natu Captured or should i say... Natu Joined!

Tips: Watch out for the comma errors and make it a bit more descriptive. Write more >:D
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Old 02-07-2007, 08:23 PM
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Default Re: Through the Cats Eyes

Ch.3 ~Nellie Certa Unina: New Team Member and New Friend~

”Of Course I’d join up with you!” Nellie exclaimed happily after I asked her.

“Really!? Oh wow this is great! Thank you!” I was so thrilled that she would join up with me. She flapped her tiny wings and landed on my head. I was still also amazed that such a small bird could have put up such a great fight. But it made sense. Being able to see into the future could give one the upper hand in any situation. She directed me in the direction that I was to go. I nodded and we set forth to getting out of this forest. As we walked on we each told the other of our pasts. I didn’t tell her about Pokemon Tech though. I didn’t think that I would handle the imagery that came with describing what happened very well. But Nellie told me about her family and how she was always picked on by her other siblings for being so small. Apparently, she was smaller then a normal Natu should have been.

“Coin hold it,” she quickly said. She then closed her eyes and began to glow.

“Nellie?” I asked her as I stopped walking. I was getting a bad feeling deep down in my gut. Was she predicting that Zation was going to attack us again? I would find out soon because it looked like she was coming back into reality.

“Coin, you have to be very cooperative and you need to listen,” she quickly said in a serious tone.

“Wha-?”

“You run when I tell you and you must turn EXACTLY when I tell you to!” Nellie exclaimed as she interrupted me. I didn’t know what was going to happen but I nodded and went into a pouncing position. I took in a deep breath and slowly let it out as I waited for her to tell me to go. A few seconds passed by until finally, she spoke.

“RUN NOW!” she exclaimed. I didn’t even bother with a nod or a response. I just burst forward with all my might. As I ran, I began to hear things behind me and I could feel vibrations in the ground. I decided to see what it was I was running from.

“HOLY!” I screeched as I saw what we were running from. We were running from large rocks that were falling from no where and in a straight line. They were even catching up to us! “NELLIE WHAT’S GOING ON?!” I screamed in terror as I picked up my speed.

“It’s the forest! It’s changing and a lot of times, water and rocks go with it! It just so happens that the large Rock wall was what was taken this time and to our misfortune, it wound up here! Now run cat! Run like you’ve got only one of your nine lives left!” she exclaimed as she held on as best she could. She quickly shut her eyes and once again predicted the future. “Coin, make a left…right…about…NOW!” I again didn’t bother with any response. I quickly slid to a spot and then made a very sharp turn to my left and bolted as fast as I could. A rock smashed down right behind me and the straight line continued on for another five rocks.

“Can…I…stop…now?” I asked Nellie as I continued to run. I was quickly running out of breath and I wasn’t sure how much longer I could have run like this.

“Yes. You can Coin,” she said in a relieved voice. I slid to a stop and then collapsed onto some grass. I looked around at where we were only to see tree after tree after tree. We were now in a forest which, I guess wasn’t too bad. Nellie hoped off my head and sat down in front of me. She was breathing in and out very rapidly.

“You okay?” I asked her as I caught my breath. She looked straight at me, smiled and nodded.

”Sometimes predicting the future like that takes a lot out of me.” Nellie then began to look around at the trees. She looked back and forth as if she was trying to chart out where we were in her head. ” I hate to say this Coin but, I think this is as far as I can really take you. These trees are all beyond my knowledge of how to escape this forest and well, I honestly doubt another change like that will occur for a few more hours. So in other words, we need to find a new Pokemon, get it to join up with us and then have it help guide us through this part of the forest,” Nellie stated as she looked at me with an upset look on her face. Even her voice had the sound of disappointment in it.

“Don’t feel upset Nellie. It isn’t your fault that you don’t know this part of the forest,” I said to her as my ears lowered, a smile appeared on my face, and as my whiskers drooped a bit. Deep down, I was beginning to feel the weight of what was quickly becoming truth place itself upon me. If we didn’t find a Pokemon that knew this part of the forest, I was most likely never going to escape and I would never see Rocket again.

”Well…” I perked my ears as I heard Nellie begin to speak. ”Since the forest won’t change for a good while and since we’re so beat out from running away from those rocks, how about we get some sleep? We’ll need it to help restore our energy because, I can’t keep using Wish all the time. Sooner or later something will go wrong and the affects might be corrupted. Especially since I’m still pretty new to the attack.”

“Alright. How about you rest first and I’ll keep watch incase any other Pokemon or possibly Zation just happen to appear?” I asked her hoping she’d agree. She had helped me so much that I felt it’d be rude for me to rest and she get first watch. It was about time that I did something for her anyways. Nellie smiled and nodded. She thanked me for my kindness in letting her rest first.

“It’s no problem Nellie. You get some rest. I’ll wake you in an hour or if something happens okay?” I asked her. She nodded and closed her eyes. She didn’t bother flying into one of the trees because she felt safe being on the ground with me.

“Well, I’m ready! Bring it on Pokemon of the Labyrinth!” I confidently said as I sat up tall with pride hammered into my body. I moved my ears back and forth listening for any suspicious sounds as I also shifted my eyes from one side to the other, searching for anything suspicious.

“Nothing so far,” I quietly said as the smile on my face vanished. I didn’t like this quiet that had seemed to claim the land around us as its own. It was creepy and beginning to get my fur all ruffled up. I released my claws from their resting points inside each one of the toes on my paws just incase. I then heard something from up above the forest. I quickly looked up as I focused on the sound.

”AERO!”

“It’s Ayro! That means the Rocket is still technically free from the mistress!” I happily exclaimed. I couldn’t really see Ayro or Rocket but at least I could hear them. I then heard another cry that didn’t sound very familiar.

”FLYGON!”

“THE MISTRESS!” I exclaimed now with anger and fear filling my body. The two emotions mixed together, forming a new, unknown emotion that was hard to describe. I could even feel a sweat drop sneak down my cheek and onto the grass. “Rocket, “I quietly said as I leaned forward a bit. My ears were now facing completely forward as well as drooping a bit as my eyes were fixated on a single blade of grass. My pupils shrunk as I began to once again get awful thoughts in my head about what might just happen to Rocket. I then spoke under my breath as fear began to dominate the anger within me.

“I must escape.”
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Old 02-07-2007, 09:29 PM
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Ch.4 ~A Teleporting Psychic~


The hour was nearly up and my energy to stay awake was rapidly decreasing. My eye lids felt like falling anvils and I was having trouble keeping my vision from going blurry. I also still had the two Pokemon screams from before repeating themselves within my mind. Though they repeated over and over, I didn’t even think about the situation that they were from. I was just too tired to focus on detail. Meanwhile, as I struggled to keep myself from just collapsing onto the grass, a figure began to eye both Nellie and me. Its eyes glowed a yellow color as it hid in the dark shadows of the trees. It flicked its thick tail back and forth a bit as it watched.

”These intruders are going to regret the day they came here. I may not know any other attack aside from Teleport but, that doesn’t mean that I can’t use it to my advantage. Spoke the figure as it nodded at its own comment. It then vanished from where it was to a different spot as it continued to watch us.

“Nya…Nellie…times up…wake up so I can sleep,” I said in a drowsy voice as I poked Nellie repeatedly with my right paw. “Nellie…Nell…c’mon bird!” I said again as I not only began to get impatient but as I continued to poke her more and more quickly. My eyes were shut as I was basically on my stomach now. Finally, after about what seemed to be a million pokes, Nellie opened her eyes and pushed my paw away.

”I felt you the first eight billion times Coin,” she said in an annoyed voice.

“Yay,” I replied while beginning to fall asleep. A smile was perched on my face as I was now completely on my stomach with my front legs stretched out as well as my back legs. I basically looked like something that decided to jump off a cliff and land stomach first into the water. Nellie rolled her eyes and began to stretch her wings. She was feeling better. Not 100% per say but, well enough where she felt like she could battle again.

”It’s quiet here. I like it. The more quiet it is then the easier it is to think,” Nellie stated as she smiled as looked up to the leaves on the trees. She then noticed that I was beginning to talk in my sleep. She looked over to me and began to listen to my sleep talking.

“Nip…cat…aw yeah…catnip…nya ha…ha…catnip.” Nellie squinted her eyes and looked away from me with an annoyed look once again on her face.

”I should have known. All cats dream about the same thing.” She let out a sigh and then once again appointed her attention to the leaves on the trees. She knew that the only way a Natu was able to see such detail in even the smallest of things was to be able to focus on it so much, that everything else literally is blacked out except for what was being focused on. That way, even the smallest detail wouldn’t be able to escape their eyes.

”Don’t get too situated little Natu. You and your trespassing friend are going to be in a world of hurt when you attack one another.”

*34 minutes later*

”It’s time.”

Nellie let out a small yawn as she began to stretch her wings again. She looked over at me as I purred away in my sleep and smiled. She then looked back over to the leaves again and watched as they moved in the dim wind. She then took in a deep breath and let it out.

”So peaceful. I could stay in this part of the forest forever and not even care.”

”Too bad that’s not happening!” spoke the voice from our watcher. Suddenly, right in front of Nellie, a Pokemon teleported in and showed itself to her. Its body’s main color was a yellow while its shoulders and chest were a brown color. It also had two brown stripes above its feet as well as one near the tip of its thick tail. Its eyes were shut and on its feet were two toes on the front with one in the back. Its arms were very skinny coming down from its brown shoulders until they came to the lower parts of the arms which were thick ovals. On the bottoms of those ovals were three fingers positioned so well that even though it didn’t have five fingers, it could still hold things. Nellie quickly fluttered onto her feet as she backed up, startled from the new Pokemon’s arrival.

”Coin wake up! COIN!” she exclaimed as she continued to keep her attention on the Pokemon before her. I slowly opened my eyes and let out a sigh.

“Has it really been an hour?” I asked in a groggy voice as I began to slowly make my way onto my paws.

”No it hasn’t. But, we have a guest here and I think that you should be awake at this point in time,” Nellie replied. I finally made it onto my paws after nearly collapsing again. I didn’t feel very refreshed since I didn’t get all that much sleep but, I figured that if Nellie woke me up like this, then she’d have a good reason to. Or, she’d better have a good reason to. I looked over the where her focus was only to see a blur. I was still waiting for my vision to become clear so, whatever it was that Nellie woke me up to see, it was going to have to wait a few more seconds.

“So…what is it?” My voice was still groggy as I began to stretch out my legs to tighten up the muscles in them. My vision soon became clear and I saw the Pokemon standing in front of us.

”I think that it’s an Abra. I’ve heard stories about them from my parents before I left the nest. Abra are teleporting Pokemon who have no attacks what so ever except for well, Teleport. They aren’t very aggressive and they all would rather run away from a battle then be in it let alone be the starter of them. But, this one approached me as if it WANTS a battle! I don’t know what to do because usually, if an Abra wants a battle then that means that they’re either on the brink of evolving OR, that they know moves other then Teleport!”

”You’re right with one thing my tiny friend. Abra usually don’t like to get into fights let alone starting one but, I am not like other Abra. No, I’m not even close to evolution and I know no other moves except for Teleport. What makes me different is the fact that I do not fear battles! I would rather be the starter AND finisher of one unlike the rest of my kind. So, prepare yourself intruders. This is MY territory and I am not going to give it up without a fight!”
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Old 02-22-2007, 03:12 AM
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Default Re: Through the Cats Eyes

Ch.5 ~Territorial Alaster: Fighting to Expel~


”My name is Alaster and I will be the victor of this fight!” declared Alaster as he clutched his hands into fists and knelt down into a fighting position.

“I don’t think so,” I hissed as I to got into a fighting position.

”I’ll predict where Alaster teleports to. You just make sure that you get an attack sent out when I tell you where he’ll be. Coin,” Nellie paused for a minute as a drop of sweat trickled down her small green feathers. I shifted my eyes over to her as I waited what else she had to say. ”Be careful. Predicting the future is the only way you’ll get an attack in. Teleport may not do any damage but it can drive the opponent insane due to their attacks never making it. So, be careful and keep your cool. Got it?” Her eyes quickly shifted over to mine. I could tell that she was a bit nervous about the battle but, even I had to admit, so was I. I nodded to what she said and returned my focus onto Alaster. Nellie did the same thing.

”BRA!” screamed Alaster as his body began to glow. He held his arms out like a child pretending to be one of those large flying things that humans ride in. He grinned and then vanished into thin air. Nellie immediately reacted by closing her eyes and listening to the voices of the future. She quickly opened her eyes back up and spun around until she was facing the opposite direction.

”COIN NOW! HE’S GOING TO APPEAR BEHIND US!” she exclaimed. I didn’t even bother to hesitate as she yelled that to me. I spun around, circulated electricity around my body, and then shot it out right towards where Nellie told me to. At first, it would look like I was attacking nothing. But, that all changed when Alaster appeared.

”What?!” he said in response to the electricity that was just inches away from his body. He was then shocked by the attack taking a normal amount of damage. The electricity soon stopped because, I wasn’t an electric Pokemon. I wasn’t able to hold it as long as they could. If I did then I would tire myself out and basically force Nellie to battle Alaster. And I didn’t want that. ”BRA!” Alaster pulled the same move as he did before. His body glowed as he levitated in the air, his arms out like the flying machines, and then him vanishing. I looked over to Nellie who was already predicting in hopes of discovering his reappearing point. Nellie’s eyes jetted open as sweat began to roll down her feathers.

“Nellie?” I asked her now a bit worried.

”I can’t do it! I can’t predict where Alaster is going to appear next! He’s discovered how to evade my predictions! He’s, he’s teleporting like there’s no tomorrow!” she said as fear claimed her eyes. She hated not being able to predict the future. To her, predicting was life and life was basically over without it. I bared my teeth and looked up to see that she was right. Alaster was appearing and then disappearing like mad! He was only visible for just a second before her teleported again. I kept shifting my eyes, trying to follow his movements and look for a weak point. But I couldn’t find one. He was moving too fast and there wasn’t any was I would be able to get in an attack!

“Wait a minute,” I quickly said as I was struck with an epiphany. “Nellie, there’s a pattern to his movements!” I quickly said to her as confidence began to grow within my voice. Nellie looked up to me with shock all over her tiny face.

”Wait, there’s a pattern? What is it cat?!” she exclaimed as shock still sat in her expression.

“Look closely Nellie,” I said in a calm voice as a grin sat upon my face. Nellie nodded and looked to where I was looking. She watched as Alaster appeared and then vanished. “Now quickly look to the left!” I exclaiemd as I turned me attention to the left of me. Nellie did the same. She then watched as Alaster appeared and vanished once more. “And left again!” Alaster appeared and vanished. “Once more!” The same thing happened. The pattern had been reviled! “Now you face the opposite direction of me. I’ll send out an attack and if it misses then you send out an attack. We’ll defiantly hit him now that we know where he is going to appear and when!” I exclaimed with excitement. Nellie nodded as the shock left her expression and was replaced with confidence.

Alaster continued with his strategy not knowing that Nellie and I had formed a plan to get to him. We both watched carefully, waiting for the perfect moments to strike. We didn’t want to miss him and give him the chance to change his strategy without taking any damage. I shut my eyes and perked my ears. Listening to the wind, I tried to pinpoint when he would appear in front of me.

“Now!” I exclaimed in my mind as I quickly opened my eyes. I opened my mouth wide and shot out a blast of freezing cold winds. Alaster appeared in front of me and was immediately hit by the Icey Wind attack! He wasn’t expecting the attack to be coming at him like that so he didn’t even think to dodge (not that he could).

“Bra!” he said as he shivered from the icey cold temperatures. He then shot his arms forward and vanished again.

”My turn,” Nellie said in her mind as she surrounded herself with psychic energy. She patiently waited until she heard Alaster appear on her right side. “CHA!” she screamed as she raised a wing, placed a foot forward, and shot the psychic energy out in a beam form that struck Alaster RIGHT when he appeared in front of her. It nearly missed him but thankfully it got him good!

“Nice! Now for me again!” I exclaimed. I then used another Icey Wind attack, once again hitting Alaster and again lowering his speed like the first time. Nellie and I watched as Alaster fell to the ground. The damage he had taken was great and surly this battle was coming to an end.

”Coin look! His eyes have swirls in them! That Psybeam attack I shot at him must have confused him! What luck!” Nellie happily exclaimed. I nodded and then charged up my fur with electricity for the final blow. I then wondered if I could combine my attacks. I lifted up my left paw and stared at it as I focused electricity to swirl around it. I bared my teeth when I felt that this might b a successful combination. I lowered my paw onto the grass, looked to Alaster and then let out a screech as I bolted forward.

Raising my right paw into the air, I lashed at Alaster. The Slash attack, combined with a Thunderbolt dealt serious damage to Alaster. But, the attack also kinda backfired on me. I accidentally shocked myself in the process. I collapsed in front of Alaster, paralyzed.

“NYA! What…luck!” I sarcastically said as I struggled to speak. I then looked at Alaster who still had the swirls in his eyes. “At…at least…it’s over,” I said relieved.

”Coin watch out!” Nellie exclaimed as she flapped her wings and flew over to me. She placed her claws onto the extra fur on my neck and pulled. She dragged me back as fast as she could. It kinda hurt and I was very confused as to why she was doing this. I opened my mouth, preparing to speak until something stopped me. A figure appeared in front of Alaster. It was tall, had a mustache (a funny looking one), two long arms, two spoons (one in each hand), and two long ears. Its chest plate was HUGE and it was a brown color as was the tip of its arms and its knees. The rest of it was a yellow color. Its snout was long and well…let’s just say this thing was big, powerful looking, and it wasn’t happy.

”What reason do you have attacking my brother like this?! He is the youngest of the Trio and I won’t have you doing this to him!” exclaimed the Pokemon.

”Coin…we’d best no mess with this guy. He’s an Alakazam. An Abra’s final form. Not even you, I, and a Mightyena could defeat this guy even if we all attacked at once and he didn’t even defend himself!” Nellie whispered as she placed her beak next to my ear.

“You serious?” I replied with a worried voice. Nellie nodded and then looked over to the Alakazam the stood before us in an attacking position. We both stayed silent. Not even muttering a word in response to the Alakazam’s question.

”ANSWER ME!” demanded the Alakazam. He pushed one of his arms forward sending a psychic blast at Nellie and me. We were both sent flying back into a tree after the attack hit us. We fell to the ground and struggled to get back to our feet.

“Nya! What power!” I exclaimed as I opened one of my eyes. I slowly tried to move my legs but it was no use. The paralysis was still in effect. Nellie on the other hand forced herself onto her feet. Her breathing was slow and deep and she stood next to me. She wore a smile on her face and grew an aura. She was predicting the future!

”Fine. If you will not answer me, then how about I teach you what happens when you mess with the Trio, through pain!” The Alakazam teleported away and then quickly reappeared in front of Nellie. His left fist glowing a blue color while his right one glowed a yellow. He then jabbed his left fist at Nellie and then his right. Over and over he jabbed at her. But, what the amazing part of this was, was that Nellie was dodging every attack! Her future predicting was even better now! She could act as she predicted and it was working at its full potential!

“Go Nellie!” I exclaimed.

”Shut up! the Alakazam ordered. He then took his left hand and shot a Psybeam at me which hit me directly and sent me flying into the tree that was literally right behind me. The force of the impact was too much for me to handle and I collapsed right there. I was out for the count while Nellie was still dodging the Alakazam’s electrical jabs.

”Coin!” Nellie exclaimed. She let her guard down and was hit by the electrical jab sent out by the Alakazam. Electricity swirled around her body and she let out a horrible screech. She then fell to the ground, fainted. We were both out and both in trouble. The Alakazam wasn’t finished with us yet. His right first again gained electricity swirling around it while he picked me up by my next with his left hand. He then threw me to the ground and locked me there by placing his foot onto my stomach. He the fired Psybeam after Psybeam at me while he shot electrical blasts from his fist over and over at Nellie.

“BROTHER STOP!”

The Alakazam halted his attacks and turned around to see his younger brother back on his feet. The swirls that once owned his eyes had vanished. His confusion had ended and he was holding his right arm that was partially frozen from my previous Icey Wind attacks

”Brother please. They both defeated me fair and square. Stop hurting them! If you keep doing this, then you’ll kill them!” Alaster exclaimed as he stared at his brother.

”But, Alaster, they attacked you even though they knew that your only attack was teleport! They took advantage of you and forced you into a fight! I cannot forgive that!” replied the Alakazam. Alaster let out a small sigh as he looked to the earth below him. He quivered for a moment and then quickly raised his head once more.

”No brother! I am the one who challenged them! I forced them into a battle! Not the other way around!” Alaster’s brother was shocked to hear this. He never knew Alaster to be a tough guy. He lifted his foot off my stomach and then walked over to Alaster. He lifted his left hand and placed it onto the tiny shoulder that belonged to his younger brother.

”You’re growing up,” he said happily as he looked at Alaster. He then noticed that Alaster’s head was full of thoughts. ”Brother?” he asked wondering what it was his brother was thinking.

~~~~~

Will Alaster join up with Coin and Nellie? =o.o= *watches in suspense if he does or not*
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Old 02-22-2007, 04:29 AM
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Default Re: Through the Cats Eyes

Story: Wow, you've got me hooked yet again. The way you used Nellie's ability to help Coin throughout the story was really creative. I love how you take what's known about a Pokemon (like Natu's ability to see the future) and build on it to not only make it believable but original and interesting. ^^ An Abra that actually wants to battle was a nice touch too.

Grammar/Spelling: This was done well. Nothing major, just a couple of typos and things I picked up.
Quote:
The pattern had been reviled!
I think you mean "revealed"
Quote:
Alaster appeared in front of me and was immediately hit by the Icey Wind attack!
The word icy doesn't have an 'e' in it
Quote:
The damage he had taken was great and surly this battle was coming to an end.
Should be "surely"

Detail: Your details were great, but there's always room for more. ^^ I especially like the way you described Abra, as well as this part:[quote]
“Yay,” I replied while beginning to fall asleep. A smile was perched on my face as I was now completely on my stomach with my front legs stretched out as well as my back legs. I basically looked like something that decided to jump off a cliff and land stomach first into the water.[/auote]
I could picture that perfectly. The details and words you use make things so clear. Well done. ^^

Battle: Your creativeness really shone through here. Having Nellie predict Alaster's Teleport attacks was a great idea, and then having Alaster get around it was good, I like how you evened out the battle again instead of making it easy for Coin and Nellie.

Length: Perfect

Outcome: Abra joined! Yay! Keep up the fantastic work and I'm looking forward to seeing what becomes of Coin. ^^
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Old 02-22-2007, 04:37 AM
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Default Re: Through the Cats Eyes (Grader ready nya =^^=)

Ch.6 ~Change: The Lab~


Alaster looked up from the ground and to his brother’s face.

”I’m going to join up with them,” he said in a serious tone. His brother was shocked.

”But why Alaster?!” he exclaimed both confused and upset.

”Brother, I heard them speaking of leaving this place. If they truly are going to leave this forest then,” Alaster paused for a moment, “Then I want to go with them!” Alaster’s brother could only smile at his reason for wanting to join up with Nellie and me.

”You always were the adventurous one of the three of us. I guess that it’s only natural for you to want to join up with those two and leave this forest. Well, if that truly is your wish then, our trio has now become a duo. I hope that your travels with these two don’t come up short. Farewell little brother.” Alaster listened as his brother spoke. Accepting every letter that escaped his mouth, Alaster couldn’t think of any other way to say the hardest words for anyone to say. He then watched as his brother backed up, smiled a gentle smile, and then vanish from sight by using Teleport.

”Goodbye…brother.”

***********

Alaster was now sitting next to Nellie and me. We were all enjoying some fruit that Nellie had found as we planned out our next move, before the forest decided to make its move. I guess that right now, you’re wondering how Nellie and I are enjoying some fruit with Alaster right? Well, it wasn’t hard to accept him onto the team. When Nellie and I came back into consciousness, we were both pretty startled to see him smiling a big smile that stretched across his face as he held out one of his hands to us. He told us what happened while we were out and then, he came out and asked if he could join up with us. We couldn’t say no. Not only did he know how to get through this part of the forest, but he was also our savior in a way. Had he not stopped his older brother, well, I don’t think I want to think about what might have happened to Nellie and me.

“So, how far can you get us Alaster?” I asked as I gnawed on a Pecha Berry.

”I can get you guys pretty far. My territory is pretty large since I share it with my other two brothers,” Alaster replied as he folded his arms and looked at me. I looked over to Nellie to ask her a question but, she was unavailable to talk. Her body was glowing and her eyes were shut. She was again predicting the future to see what some of the upcoming events were. I shrugged and then took another bite of the Pecha Berry that my paws were grasping.

”Well, we’d best finish this fast. The forest is going to change very soon and we need to be prepared incase something arises after the change. Now, I can’t tell you what will happen after the change since it’s random. Even a vision into the future wouldn’t be able to tell you how the forest would change and what dangers might come with that change. The only time I can predict something like that is when the forest has already started the changing process. It’s very strange and confusing,” Nellie stated as she came out of her predictions and looked at both Alaster and me. She then picked up an Oran Berry and took a bite out of it.

“Right. Well, whatever the change is, I’m positive that we can handle it!” I exclaimed as I clutched my right paw into a fist. The three of us then continued to eat our fill of the berries that Nellie had found. There truly weren’t that many berries (about two for each of us) but, we made the best of it. After the last berry was eaten, we all got onto our feet and began to stretch. It was odd but, we were feeling a little stiff for some reason. We didn’t put much thought into it though. It was just us being stiff. Nothing really too strange about that.

”The change is happening,” Nellie said as she flapped her wings and flew onto my head. The three of us huddled together, making sure that there was no way that the change could separate us. Patiently, we watched as our surroundings began to fade in and out like a blinking light. The trees all changed their position, bushes appeared next to us, and apart of a small pond that was mostly hiding behind a tree appeared.

“How long will this last?” I asked as the change continued.

”It’ll be over soon. The changes take a long time to happen once complete but, when the changes are occurring, they move rather quickly. The reason why the changes take so long to occur again is because, it’s like the forest has to scan itself to view all the changes. Then, it’s like it records down everything that happened in an insanely large amount of detail from where a boulder went, to where a single grain of sand or dirt went,” Nellie calmly said as she shifted her eyes back and forth, examining the new surroundings that were still fading in and out.

“So it’s like a program. Once everything is set in place, then it’s simple to run. But when an upgrade is added, it takes time for the program to adjust itself to the changes. And then once it finishes that, it can run smoothly again,” I said. The surroundings soon stopped fading in and out. They became solid. The change was complete. Nellie hoped off of my head onto the new, untouched by us, grass. She turned around and faced Alaster and me. A large bush sat behind her, making her look like an ant lost in a maze of skyscrapers.

“Exactly Coin! It’s just like a program,” Nellie happily said as she smiled. The only reason she knew of what a program was, was because her father would tell her about them. You see, her father used to be an owned Xatu before his owner died from a stroke. His owner was a scientist so, he spent a lot of time around human constructed phenomenons.

”Hey guys...” Alaster began in an uneasy voice,“You’d best come look at this.” Nellie turned around to see Alaster peering through the large bush. She looked at me and I to her. We then walked through the bush, pushing our heads through its many leaves and thin branches that extended out towards the sky.

“Holy,” I began as Nellie and I were now looking at what Alaster was. We all then walked all the way through the bush and stood staring in awe at what was before us.

A large, white, two story building sat before us. It had many windows going around its walls and, there were two large doors in the front of it. We then noticed a bunch of deep silver colored boxes that had poles connecting the tops to the bottoms. Inside of the boxes were injured and terrified Pokemon that not dare try to use an attack to escape them. Those boxes brought back many gruesome memories for me about my past life as a battle slave. How I was kept in a box like that. How it was so small, that I couldn’t even move unless I wanted to hurt myself.

“Cages,” I shuttered. My fur cringed as I spoke that menacing word. Nellie and Alaster looked at me and then back to the boxes that they now knew were cages.

”This place. I am getting a very bad vibe from it. I didn’t even know it was here until just now!” Alaster exclaimed as he stared in a trance like state at the white building.

”Same here Alaster. My parents never even mentioned one solitary word about this place. I know that it isn't Pokemon made. Too advanced and the materials aren’t even native to this forest. This has to be the work of humans. It has to be,” she said.

My ears perked up as I heard the two large front doors open. Thankfully, Alaster, Nellie and I were too far away from the building to be spotted by who, or whatever was coming out of it. We all calmly watched, not letting our fear or anger get the best of us as humans came out. They were wearing black outfits that outstretched at the bottoms and circled around their backs. Big red ‘G’s’ sat placed on the front of their outfits like Team Rocket’s big red ‘R’. On their heads sat helmets that had visors over their eyes and had a stick extending down from the top towards their mouths. We couldn’t tell what they were saying so, we took it upon ourselves to get closer. We snuck from bush to bush, making sure to not make any sounds. We wanted to be as quiet as an Arbok when it was sealing its prey’s fait as it slithered soundless towards it.

“Girafarig, Skitty, Vaporeon, Tropius, Ivysaur, Nidorina, Nidorino, Togepi, and a Pichu. All of these are for the genetics part of the lab right?” asked a woman as she placed her hands on her hips.

“Yes ma’am. These Pokemon were all captured in order to test out some new chemicals that our genetics specialists have prepared,” responded a man as he walked up next to her. They both stared at the quivering Pokemon as they spoke. They then turned around and walked back into the building while other humans came out with carts. Picking up cage by cage, the humans set them all down onto the carts and rolled the Pokemon’s life and freedom away into the building. We could hear the screams and cries of the Pokemon pleading for their release. It hurt us to listen to it but, what were we to do? We were trying to stay hidden from the eyes of these humans. Once the last cart was pushed into the building, we made our move. We sprang forth and entered the building JUST as the doors slammed tight. We watched as the last cart rolled down the hall and tuned right into another hallway.

“C’mon,” I quietly said as I began to walk forward. The others nodded and followed behind me. As we slowly made our way down the hall, we examined what it looked like. The walls were just as white as the outside of the building, while the floor was made out of some kind of smooth yellow squares that had the ability to create reflections of us. There were a few doors on the left wall that emanated a dark feeling, pushing our interest further and further from wanting to know their contents. We reached the end of the hallway that connected to another hallway going both left and right.

”Which way do we go?” Nellie asked as she hoped in front of me and stared down both the hallways. Both of them were giving off this awful stench of evil but, we had to pick one.

”That way,” Alaster said as he pointed to the left.

“Why left?” I asked him.

”I’m really not all that sure to be honest. For some reason, it just feels like we’re being called down that way by some unknown force,” Alaster replied as he lowered his hand and looked at me. I shrugged not knowing what he was talking about. Since all I could feel was my gut screaming at me to just get out of this place, and abandon any Pokemon that were in it that needed help. But, never the less, we went to the right as Alaster suggested.

We walked for a few minutes in utter silence. Our minds doing the talking for us as we passed door, after door, after door. It didn’t happen to Nellie or me but, when we passed by yet another door, Alaster stopped. He turned and faced it.

“Alaster?” I asked as I halted my movement, holding on of my front paws up in the air as I glanced over my shoulder to the frozen Abra. After hearing me speak, Nellie stopped hoping and twisted her entire body around until she was facing me and Alaster. I set my paw onto the cold, smooth floor and turned to Alaster as I raised a brow. Alaster’s attention was glued to the door he was facing. I walked up to him and asked, “Hey, you okay?” I then looked up at the door to see the words Testing Room on it towards the middle of the top of it. Something was up with this door. It had Alaster like a puppet. Forcing him to just stare blankly at it.

Alaster then quickly shot his arms forward and then vanished from sight! He had teleported himself into the room!
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  #10  
Old 02-27-2007, 11:26 PM
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Default Re: Through the Cats Eyes (Grader ready nya =^^=)

Ch.7 ~A Polygonal Rarity~


“Alaster!” I exclaimed after watching him vanish into the room. I knew that it was the room he teleported into. He had been staring blankly at it like he was in a trance or something! I quickly turned to Nellie who immediately knew what to do. She closed her eyes, began to glow a blue color, and then vanished from sight. I then vanished as well. We both re-appeared in the room that was drawing so much attention. It was pretty dark. No lights were on except for the one that was coming from a large tube at the top right corner of the room. Alaster was in front of it.

“What’s wrong with you?!” I exclaimed as I walked up to him. He didn’t respond. This really was setting me off. I was getting fed up with his trance like state. It wasn’t normal. I then used a Scratch attack right across his side bringing him out of the trance he was in.

”YEOW!” he screamed as he jumped up. ”WHY DID YOU ATTACK ME?!” he yelled as he levitated in the air.

“Because it was my early birthday present to you WHAT DO YOU THINK?!” I screeched after replacing my sarcastic tone with an angry one. “There could have been humans in here!”

”There weren’t. I made sure of it when I was staring at the door. I was scanning the room with my psychic powers to look for any heat signatures. I found only one but it was very feint. To feint to be a humans. So I knew it was safe,” Alaster said as he calmed down and then lowered himself back onto the floor. He then again turned his attention to the tube. ”This is what I felt calling me,” he told us. Nellie and I looked up to the tube.

”No way! It, it can’t be!” Nellie exclaimed as she recognized what the tube was holding. Inside the tube was this murky green colored liquid that was being lit up by some kind of a built in light. There was also a figure inside of it with many cords attached to it. The figure’s body wasn’t like anything that I had ever seen before! Its body looked like a bunch of waked out boxes all merged together. From what I could tell, it had two legs, and a head that kinda looked like a slightly flattened out diamond. It also had a nearly flat tail. Due to the liquids being in the tube, I couldn’t tell what the figure’s true colors were.

“What is it?” I asked as I turned to Nellie. Nellie flapped her wings and flew to the tube.

”This Coin, this is one of the forests mythical Pokemon. It is so hardly ever seen that its existence in this forest has become a myth! This, this is a Porygon!” Nellie exclaimed as she stared at the Pokemon.

“A Porygon?” I repeated as I stared at the figure.

”Yes. Porygon. A Pokemon that’s usually seen interacting with anything mechanical. They favor those types of things for some reason. That’s why they are hardly ever seen in here,” Alaster added.

“How do you know this?” I asked Alaster as I looked over at him.

”Every Pokemon here in the Labyrinth Forest knows all about Porygon. We all know their history here in the forest and we all know what they love to hang around. But, even though we know all this doesn’t mean that as time goes on, our minds, due to the very little sightings of Porygon, begin to think that what we all know is just some myth made up by the eldest Pokemon of the forest in order to entertain younger Pokemon,” Alaster replied as he looked to me. He let out a sigh and then looked to two machines that were both sitting up against the wall by the massive tube that held the unconscious Porygon.

One of the machines had the words, Vital Signs on it while the other had the words, Life Support on it.

“Vital Signs? Life Support? What do those mean?” I asked confused.

Vital Signs are indications that tell us if something is wrong with another’s body. Like if they are dieing, doing okay, as well as other things like that. Life Support is a machine used to help keep one alive when they can no longer do it on their own. For Pokemon, these machines also show the brainwave pattern so whoever is helping us or, destroying us knows what’s going on with us mentally. I learned all about these from my father before I left the nest. He told me all about human built wonders such as these things. It was really interesting to listen to and imagine what it was that these things all looked like,” Nellie stated as she stared at the cold, gray boxes that had flashing lights all over them.

“So, that’s what they do,” I said a bit impressed. The human race was more interesting then I had thought. I then perked my ears as I heard a sound outside the door. I quickly realized it was humans! “GUYS! HUMANS! HIDE!” I shouted as quietly as I could. Nellie flew up high and landed on top of a bookcase that was at the opposite end of the room. It was dark up there so she was safe. Alaster ran behind one of the machines as did I. It was a fairly tight fit between them and the wall but, it would have to do. The only other place to hide was under the table that was against the wall that the door was on but, it was too risky.

The door opened up and in walked two humans. They were both men and they had on different outfits then the humans we had seen previously. They were wearing these long white coats and one of them was holding a clipboard. They walked up to the tube that was holding the Porygon and began to speak.

“So, how is it doing?” asked the one that wasn’t holding the clipboard. The other let out a sigh of disappointment.

“The Porygon’s body keeps rejecting every chemical we inject into it. At this rate, we’ll never get it to evolve into a form more powerful then Porygon2. It’ll probably just die from all the injections,” said the clipboard guy.

“Damnit. We’ve wasted over $7,000 on this damn Pokemon only to find out that it’s going to die?! Just perfect! Darien won’t be very pleased with us. He wants this Porygon to be genetically mutated into a stronger form then Porygon2 by tomorrow! If he doesn’t get what he wants, he is going to feed us to his literally starving Mightyena and Houndoom!” exclaimed non clipboard guy in a frustrated voice.

“I know Ken I know. Our best bet right now is to flee. This thing won’t mutate in time and if we stay, we’ll be murdered by starving muts,” said clipboard guy as he walked over to the table. He placed the clipboard that he was holding down onto it, let out a sigh and then turned around. “C’mon Ken. Let’s leave this thing to die.” The guy named Ken let out a sigh and then placed his hand to his head.

“Nine months of experimentations on this damn thing and look where it gets us. It gets us running on the lamb. You do know that Darien isn’t going to tolerate this and is going to hunt down our sorry butts right?” Ken asked as he walked to the table where clipboard guy was.

“I know. But what other choice do we have?” asked clipboard guy as he then walked to the door. “Let’s go.” Ken nodded and followed clipboard guy out of the room. Alaster, Nellie and I waited a few minutes before emerging from our hiding positions. We walked over to the tube where the dieing Porygon was.

”We’ve got to help it!” Nellie exclaimed in a worried tone.

“Yeah. We have to! We can’t just let it die!” I replied.

”Well then, what are we waiting for? Nellie, you use a powerful attack to break open that tube. Coin, do you know Protect? Alaster asked as he looked at me.

“Yeah. Why?” I asked.

”Good. Once that tube is shattered, the chemical filled liquid will spill everywhere. Nellie and I will teleport to higher grounds so the liquid doesn’t touch us. You then use a Protect attack on both you and Porygon. I’ll then teleport you and the Porygon back outside and Nellie will follow with her Teleport. Got it?” Alaster stated. I was impressed. He had already formulated a plan of action to save this Porygon. Nellie and I nodded.

Alaster teleported himself to the top of the same bookcase that Nellie was on earlier. He then gave the command to begin the plan.

”Right! Psychic!” Nellie called out as she unleashed a blow of strong Psychic energy. The attack smashed right into the tube causing a crack to form. The Porygon inside opened its eye up about an inch as the Psychic attacks continued on. Again and again, Nellie shot out attack after attack. Each time causing the crack to get bigger and bigger until finally, it gave!

”Nellie get out of there! Coin protect yourself!” Alaster screamed as the green liquid came rushing through the broken tube. Nellie reacted faster then Alaster could even speak. She was already atop the bookcase with him before he even got to her name. I on the other hand wasn’t very lucky. The Porygon was hard to see through the liquid and it was difficult for me to get a protection barrier around it. ”COIN NOW!” exclaimed Alaster in the loudest voice that he had ever gone it. I reacted quickly whether the Porygon was with me or not. I began my attack, tightly shut my eyes, and placed up a barrier but, some of the chemical filled liquid moved faster then me. After the water splashed against the opposite end of the room, it flew back into itself and pushed itself making ripples that went back and forth from both the eastern and western walls. When I opened my eyes, I saw a miracle. Porygon was within my barrier! But, what wasn’t a miracle was that we were both drenched with green liquid and, we were standing in it as well.

“This isn’t good!” I said worried. Alaster quickly teleported out of the room with both me and Porygon. Before Nellie teleported herself out, she heard an alarm go off throughout the building. She then saw the hallway begin to flash a red color as many yelling voices and footsteps grew louder and louder. She then teleported herself back outside where Alaster, the Porygon, and I were at.

”An alarm went off inside that building. There is bound to be a swarm of humans bursting out of there any minute now looking for those two other humans and this Porygon!” she exclaimed.

”That’s not the worst of our problems. It seems that my suspicions were right about the liquid,” Alaster said in a worried voice as he then looked to me and the Porygon. I was flat on my stomach and my eyes were shut. My breathing was steadily growing heavier while Porygon’s was doing the opposite. ”It seems that once touched by the body, the chemical filled water will literally seep itself into you and infect your blood stream. Coin got hit by the water and now he’s under its influence.”

”Well what do we do?!” Nellie exclaimed in fear for both me and the Porygon.

”I’ve heard tales of Miltank being able to heal one completely with a special attack of theirs. It’s called Heal Bell and it’s very effective. Nellie, you go out and search for a Miltank. Get it to join up with you and then come back here. I’ll keep an eye on Coin and Porygon,” Alaster said as he looked at Nellie.

”Right. I’ll be back as soon as I get one to join up with me! I promise! I won’t let you down!” Nellie said. She then flapped her wings and flew off in search of both mine, and the Porygon’s only hope for survival.
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  #11  
Old 04-05-2007, 06:29 PM
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Ch.8 ~A Miltank of a Thousand Healings~

Nellie flapped her wings faster and faster as she bolted through the forest. She could a feel a change would happen in a couple of hours, but she didn’t know how many hours this “couple” was. She shifted her eyes from tree to tree, bush to bush and from sky to ground. She looked everywhere for a Miltank. Not letting one piece of scenery escape her eyes.

”Coin, Porygon, hold on you two. Nellie will be coming back with a Miltank I know it! She’s a loyal friend. So please you two, hold on until she gets here,” Alaster said as he let out a frustrated sigh. He then looked up to see men running out of the building. They were all screaming at once so it was hard to hear exactly what it was that they were saying.

”Raw! Coin where are you!” hollered an unfamiliar voice. Alaster looked up to see a Charizard, a rather large Charizard, landing in the path of the humans. It burst out flames so hot that some of the men were killed right when they touched them. More men could be seen running out from the building as the alarm continued. They had ropes, nets, and prongs that had electricity sparking out from the tips of them. ”Damn you humans! I have a mission and I’m not letting you get in my way!” screamed the fire dragon. Driven by rage and anger, he unleashed another Flamethrower attack, burning the men before him. Alaster watched as nets were thrown up and set onto the dragon. Ropes were quickly tied to his feet and a chain was wrapped around his neck. The dragon was then pulled to the ground and shocked by the long prongs.

“We have a new test subject men. We’ll put this one through fusion since we’ve only done that to small sized Pokemon,” spoke a man as he walked out of the base. He seemed to be the leader since all the other humans were saluting to him and listening to his every word.

“Sir, what Pokemon would you like to use?” asked a scientist as he walked up to the leader. The leader walked around the Charizard, examining it and laughing at his ideas. The Charizard struggled to get up and struggled to release flames from its mouth but, there was no success.

”What are they going to do?” Alaster said to himself as he watched the humans.

“We’ll rip off his wings and replace those with Salamence wings. His back limbs can be ripped off in general and replaced with nothing. We’ll create a sort of, Rayquaza substitute. We’ll have to inject chemicals into its body to change the color of its hide though. We’ll also have to use parts from a Camerupt to mimic the prongs coming out of Rayquaza’s back. Men, this won’t be easy but if we succeed, we’ll have ourselves a new species that I’ll name Rayquanorm. The name is derived from combining Rayquaza and normal if you didn’t already get it. Now, take this worthless dragon into the surgery room. Put him under eighty milligrams of sleeping gas and begin the operation.” Spoke the leader as he waved his hand wand headed back into the base.

”WHAT?! NO WAIT! I HAVE AN OWNER! YOU CAN’T DO THIS TO ME! MISTRESS HELP ME! MISTRESS!” screamed the Charizard as he was pulled into the lab.

”Oh no! I’ve got to help him! Coin, Porygon, stay put and stay hidden. I’m going to help out that Charizard!” Alaster said as he looked down at us. He then teleported away leaving me and the Porygon alone. I knew that Zation was a jerk, but no Pokemon deserved that.

Meanwhile, Nellie was still frantically searching for a Miltank. She was getting worried and upset that there were none to be found. That is, until she literally ran into one.

”What the! Who are you?” yelled the Miltank as she turned around and faced Nellie.

”Please! You’ve got to come with me! My friends are in…“

”Go with you! Unlikely!” interrupted the Miltank. She lifted up her foot and slammed it down. Nellie tried to dodge but she wasn’t fast enough. The Stomp attack made a successful hit and dealt a lot of damage. Being a tiny bird on the ground with a massive foot being smashed onto you isn’t something that would normally end happily.

”Please I just need your help!” Nellie cried. The Miltank ignored her and jumped into the air. She then let her weight bring her back to the earth in an attempt at using a Body Slam attack. ”HOLY!” Nellie rolled to the side quickly dodging the attempted attack. ”If talking to you won’t work, then I guess defeating you is my only chance at actually getting your attention,” Nellie said under her voice as she let out a huff of air. She then charged up an attack and released a Psychic attack. The blast of psychic energy hit the Miltank making her slid back. A tree soon became her brace and the Psychic attack ended.

”So you do have some fight in you! Then let’s go!” spoke the cow. She then jumped up, outstretched her body and then quickly went into a Rollout attack. Her body spun faster and faster in the air. Once she hit the ground, dirt was thrown up behind her and she shot forward like a bullet.

”Concentrate…and…NOW!” Nellie vanished just as the Rollout was about to hit her. Instead, it hit a nearby tree and bounced off of it. It then hit another tree and bounced off of that one. Nellie reappeared and sat down on a tree branch. She watched as the Miltank kept bouncing off of the trees, the attack gaining more strength each time. ”Ha-ha nothing like watching real live pinball! BUAHAHAHA!! SO FUNNY!” Nellie chirped as she fell onto her back laughing.

”Laugh at this!” The Miltank shot up and smashed into the branch that Nellie was on, sending her flying up towards the barrier that surrounded the forest. She was shocked from the barrier and sent flying back towards the ground. She fell onto the ground taking major damage and nearly fainting.

”Only one chance,” she said. She quickly turned around and shot out a purple beam that hit the rolling Miltank as she was in the air. The Miltank escaped the Rollout and fell to the ground. Her eyes were now swirls and she couldn’t seem to focus.

”What…what did you do?!” the dazed Miltank asked as she struggled to get back onto her feet.

”It’s called Confuse Ray duh! It’s very effective! Now, for Wish!” Nellie exclaimed. She placed her wings together and made a wish to heal her HP. In just a few moments, she was completely healed and ready to continue the fight. She then focused all of her power and sent out another attack. A large blast of power could be felt but, no damage was taken.

”What on earth was that? Your silly attempt at using a powerful attack on me?! But just incase, I think a little Biding would be best for right now,” spoke the Miltank as she focused her body and prepared to embrace any hit that was attempted on her.

”Dangit, she got an attack in! Well, no matter. I should hit her with everything I’ve got!” Nellie said as she flapped her wings and flew upwards. She then shot out waves of Psychic energy at the Miltank. The Psychic attack hit her dealing a lot of damage. Then came the attack that Nellie used earlier. It was the same move that she had used on me when we first met! It was a Future Sight! The large ball of psychic energy smashed into the Miltank sending her to her side and then rolling into a tree.

”No more! This is your final hour bird! Behold my power!” The Miltank shook her head and focused right on Nellie. The confusion had not yet gone onto Nellie’s side. She watched as the Miltank shot out, pulling her fist back and then shooting it forward. She hit Nellie hard and then spun around, smashing her tail into Nellie and sending her flying towards to ground.

”I can’t lose!” Nellie cried. She again used Teleport and vanished just before she and the ground collided. She re-appeared on the ground, but she was very tired. Her legs were wobbling and she was having trouble keeping her balance. She flapped her wings together, making another Wish in order to heal herself again.

”Not this time birdie!” yelled the Miltank. She let her weight bring her down from the sky and began spinning once more.

”Just a little more just a little more!” Nellie said as she could feel herself healing again. She looked up and stopped her Wish attack in order to use Teleport once more. She vanished right as the Miltank stopped spinning and slammed her tail on the ground.

”Clever, but not clever enough!” the Miltank screamed as she jumped up off her feet, spun around and smashed her tail right into Nellie’s side as she re-appeared. ”I figured that since you’re so weak right now that you wouldn’t be able to Teleport very far.”

Nellie was slammed into a nearby tree. She slid to the ground and opened only one of her eyes. She was gasping hard and she again struggled to get back up. The Miltank was surprised. For a puny little bird, Nellie was taking hit after hit. She was on the verge of fainting and yet, she pushed herself forward.

”I’m not done yet!” Nellie chirped. She then shot out a powerful Psychic blast hitting Miltank and sending her flying back into a tree. Once the attack was finished, Miltank fell to the ground on her stomach. She pushed herself back up and laughed.

”Impressive bird. But don’t count me out or yourself as a winner of this fight. I still have plenty of energy left in me to continue on while you are struggling to even stand up. Look at yourself. You’re now holding yourself up with one of your wings, you can only open one eye, and you’re gasping so hard that even I feel like I’m out of breath. Face it kid. You’re no match for me!”

”Shut up! I cannot lose! I have friends in danger of dieing and they need the help from a Miltank! And I need to defeat you so I can get you to come with me to heal them!” Nellie cried. She then shot herself forward and made her beak glow.

Whoa whoa bird hold on for a second!” the Miltank said as she held her arms up, blocking the attempted Peck attacks. She then blocked a close range Psychic that dealt a bit of damage but, not as much as it would have Nellie been at full health. She then blocked more Peck attacks and had no choice. She spun around and smashed her tail once more into Nellie sending her flying into a tree. ”Kid, what makes you think that defeating me would automatically get me to go with you to help out your friends?”

”Be….because they need you. I…I promised…promised them that….I would get a…I would get a Miltank to heal them….please….just….just go with me….heal them and the you….then you can be on your way,” Nellie collapsed right there. She was out of energy and could no longer keep herself conscious.

“Dangit what do I do? This is so confusing,” spoke the frustrated Miltank as she looked at the fainted Nellie.

~~~~~~

Will Miltank join up with Nellie because she has never seen such will power? Or will Miltank be all, screw this I want me some H2O!!

And count the past two chapters before this as a Miltank thing I guess. I thought this would work out good within my head but then it got all wierd after I typed it up. Sorry bout that.
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  #12  
Old 04-07-2007, 06:04 PM
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Default Re: Through the Cats Eyes (ready for teh grade nya)

>Insert funny opening phrase here<

Story/Plot:
Ah, very nice. You really pulled off the originality factor with this. I like how you gave all of the little guys their own distinct personality. It's much easier and more exciting to read when you don't write them as robots dishing out attacks, so nice job. I'd have to say that Alaster is my favorite; he's a smart one. ;P And poor Charizard. ;_; I'm interested to see what turns out for the gang. This is one of the few stories that, instead of being relieved that it was over, I actually wanted it to keep going. Very good, very good. :)

Grammar/Spelling:
There really weren't any big errors; you did a really great job editing this and I can tell you've spent a lot of time on it. There were a couple of things I noticed though:

Quote:
The human race was more interesting then I had thought.
That should be more than. "Then" is used when you're going to say or describe what's happening next. When you're trying to tell a difference of size or quality, like "more than, less speed than, etc." you'd use than.

Your dialogue was really good. You had the right punctuation and everything, but for some reason a lot of the quotes were backwards. Like here:

Quote:
Raw! Coin where are you!” hollered an unfamiliar voice.
You might have some kind of default set on your computer or something, I don't know, but make sure you flip those around.

Raw! Coin where are you!” hollered...

That's pretty much it. I was going to point out a place where you used hoped instead of hopped, but I can't find it. ;P Anyway, this was really good.

Detail/Description: Plenty of it. You did really good describing the attacks; I could picture everything really well. I can't think of anything negative to say here. :P Just keep it up, and don't be afraid to cram your story with as much detail as you can.

And this doesn't have anything to do with anything, but I thought I'd point it out anyway because it was funny:

Quote:
It’s called Confuse Ray duh! It’s very effective! Now, for Wish!” Nellie exclaimed.
Maybe it's just me, but that was adorable. ;)

Length: Perfect. I was going to say something else here, but I forgot what it was...

Battle: This was brilliant. You made nearly a third of the story, and that's great. Battles are a huge part of the story, so I like the big and long ones best. You also made sure to make it both interesting, and two-sided. I don't have a single problem with it. Way to go, champ. :P

Outcome:
Creative Plot? Check. Good Grammar? Check. Detail? Check. Length? Check. Battle? Check. Hmm, looks like you've got yourself the perfect story. Miltank joined! Holy cow...
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