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Stories Write a story to catch Pokemon. A Grader will then decide if it catches or not.


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Old 05-16-2008, 02:22 AM
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Default The Tails of Ryan [Story Deal]

Ready for a grade. =)

Why is it that I procrastinate with Pokelord's story deals?

This was inspired by something TyT said in a thread about her gathering around and tellingt the newbies about Ryan, our long lost leader. I had fun with this, second story of mine that takes place in Pe2K. I like them because the members who have been here for quite some time can connect with the characters. There's a also a refrence to my first Pe2K story. ;p

_____

The Tails of Ryan

“Phantom_Leaf” the Bulbasaur stood outside the double doors, short triangular ears on the top of her head twitching with anxiousness. Four stumpy legs allowed her to step back and view the doors better, crimson eyes reading the sign overhead for the fifth time as the emerald bulb on her back held her balance. The hall she was in, lined with silver wallpaper and navy carpeting, was void of any other signs of life. The female Seed Pokemon mouthed the words on the sign, having the words “New Members Thread” memorized by heart by now.

Okay, Leaf inwardly sighed, closing her eyes for a moment so that her nerves didn’t threaten too jump from her body that was dappled with green spots. I’m only going to introduce myself, no biggie. A quick intro about me, add some humor for spice, and it will be done.

However, it was easier said than done. Her paws refused to let her pass the entryway, and every possible way she could mess up ran through her mind like two trains on the same track ready to collide, a fiery explosion sure to ensue. What if she messed up and she ended up tripping over her own words? What about if she was accidentally skipped, and she didn’t have a chance to introduce herself?

Leaf blamed these pessimistic thought on her past experience with forums. Before she was the wise fourteen-year-old she was now, she was an innocent nine-year-old who was encouraged to join a forum by her older, and slightly cynical, big brother. Just to see her struggle, he didn’t explain about forum etiquette or the fact that reading the rules would save her a lot of trouble. Due to the fact that she didn’t know that chat speak was frowned upon and quadruple posting was not allowed, she was flamed and dubbed a “n00b” for the six months she was there.

Leaf gritted her teeth and shook her head as though to send the memories of the past flying from her cranium. She wasn’t that naïve little girl from years ago, she had grown and matured. Leaf now knew what was appropriate and what was not, she now knew that rules should be read in case a forum was more strict than others in some areas. She was ready to get a new start in a forum where nobody knew her past experiences (she had even gone as far as changing her username from “thebesttrainer1331” to “Phantom_ Leaf”).

If my feet will take me there! She mentally cried in annoyance, staring at her paws as though they would suddenly decide to haul her small bulk through the entrance. After staring at the plush carpet beneath her for a couple of moments, she inhaled loudly and when she exhaled, she forced herself to shuffle through the doors before she changed her mind.

Noise bombarded her, the sound of both chatter of members and the clanking of objects against one another as they were being set up for the welcome rang in the air. As Leaf started down the stairs, she began to take in the room around her; it was different than the last forum she had been into, it was more busy and active.

The best way to describe it was that it was a bowl-shaped room. The surroundings that were leveled with the door she had just come through (the rim of the bowl) were dotted with mature looking Pokemon while the indent (where the welcome was going to take place in) was crowded with Pokemon of every size and shape. The floor was a silky carpet, soft to the touch, and, just like the walls and ceiling, was a rich navy.

Before Leaf had the chance to make her way to the last step to enter the hustle and bustle that was going on down below, she was tapped on the shoulder. The female Grass type jumped in the air and nearly toppled to the floor below when she tottered on the edge. Hearing a muttered apology behind her, she turned around and was met by a wash of elegant silver.

The bird, whose metal wings were lined with ruby feathers, steadied the newbie with the tips of his sharp feathers. Once Leaf’s paws were firmly on the ground, the stranger let go, stood back on his three-toed talons, and looked down with his topaz-yellow eyes. The Bulbasaur began to feel her muscles tense with fear until she caught a kind glint in the Steel type’s eyes. Suddenly, the notched dark gray tail didn’t look as dangerous, and the beak and crest did not look similar to the claws of a Persian.

“Sorry to startle you,” the Skarmory began, a sincere tone in his words. With a move that made the gray plates on his long neck ripple, he stared at the newcomer better with a cocked head. “Name’s “Silver Skarmory”, but you can call me Mark.”

“’Phantom Leaf” but you can call me “Leaf”,” the new member told him in a bit of squeak.

Mark warmly smiled at Leaf’s nervous pitch.

“To continue, I was going to mention that over there. Just wanted to help since you don‘t seem to know where to go.”

He pointed beyond the crowd at the foot of the stairs. The dinosaur-like creature raised her head and squinted to see beyond the bobbing heads of the Pokemon and found what the raptor was pointing at. Some kind of area was set up for registration, two oak tables that were spread out were stacked knee high with papers. The pair of Pokemon behind the tables were amazingly patient, though their eyes twitched from time to time.

The Skarmory let out a chuckle as Leaf’s eyes widened when she saw how many Pokemon stood between her and the registration desks.

“Wow, biggest crowd I’ve seen in a long time. No doubt that most of them just want to advertise their websites and leave, though.”

The bird shook his metal-clad head and then began to guide the Seed Pokemon down the stairs.

“Come, I know how to travel through crowds.”

“Do the newbies just get out of the way because they’re scared of you?” Leaf quipped, getting comfortable with this being of flesh and steel. Once she got passed his lethal-looking beak and sharp-as-knives wings, a gentle demeanor shone through. Granted, she only came to this conclusion by the way he spoke, but his words were lively and witty.

A mischievous smile that could only be achieved via a beak formed.

“Something like that.”

_____

The time for this moment came far too fast for Leaf.

Before she knew it, she was forced to climb the wooden stairs of the stage that had been set up at the center of the room. The floor was not that big, probably only the size of a small living room. The curtains that were a faded red, similar to the hue of dried blood, were drawn back; only the edges of the fabric fluttered with the air that circulated in the room.

Her paws echoed in the silent room as she made her way to the center; even the new members quieted down, the rude ones more than likely hoping for someone to fall flat on their face either literally or metaphorically. When Leaf reached her spot and tore her eyes from the rough wood beneath her, she was met with more pairs of eyes than she could count. All of them were set in many different kind of Pokemom, but they were all staring at her, waiting for her to talk.

Leaf almost dropped the jet-black microphone she held in one of her leathery vines from how her body shook with the nerves that had suddenly sprung to life. The roof of her mouth had gone dry, but when she stared at the gleaming form of Skarmory to her right, she licked her lips and began to speak.

“My name’s “Phantom_Leaf”, Leaf for short. I love just chatting with friends, about a anything really, and like to past the time with reading and listening to music.”

Leaf closed her eyes, swallowing to get rid of the stutter she felt was forming on her lips. It already felt as though a millennia had passed as she said those two simple sentences. She didn’t know how much she hated addressing many people at once until now, and she now wished she had rehearsed what she was going to say beforehand.

With an internal sigh, Leaf reminded herself that she could not get out of it now. It was either finish up her introduction or quit in the middle of it, and she was sure as heck not going to do the latter.

Gripping the microphone tighter, Leaf spoke again. “I also like Role Play and the Pokemon games, which is why I joined this forum. I also want to just get a new start since the last time I was in a forum, it didn’t go too well. That is all!”

As Leaf put the microphone back in its stand, she visibly flinched at her last words. She would have laughed at her last words that sounded like the ending for cheesy cartoon if snickers didn’t echo in the far corner of the room. Brushing past an energetic Oddish that was about to make his introduction, she made her way down the stairs she had come from. Mark smiled at her and, with his talons’ clicking muffled by the carpet underneath, walked over to her.

“Uggh, those obnoxious newbies don’t know when to be respectful, do they?” She muttered, casting one last glance at the corner that had released the muffled laughs from before.

“Don’t worry about them,” Mark said with a shake of his head. “Some people will never learn.”

Leaf shrugged in agreement but could not help the heat of embarrassment rush to settle on her face.

“I just wish someone like the administrator could deal with them.”

To Leaf’s surprise, Mark chuckled loudly after her vexed words were uttered. When the annoyance was redirected at him, the intimidating member closed his eyes yet while still keeping the huge grin on his face.

“With Ryan gone, you’ll a have a better chance of getting rid of the n00bs by having them die of old age.”

“Who’s Ryan?”

Mark finally tamed the Cheshire grin on his face long enough so that he could act his age. Motioning with a ragged wing, Leaf followed him out of the stage and to the direction of the far wall. To her surprise, she could see the outline of a door if she squinted her eyes and tilted her head enough, though Mark had no trouble seeing it. With a mutter of, “It’s a spare room they’ve built but never used.”, he opened it with a talon and allowed her inside.

The room was small and dark, only the size of two broom closets. The sole light bulb above them told their eyes that the room was a dark maroon from the low ceiling to the carpeted floor that was practically spotless due to the small number of people that passed through. Mark sat himself on the far wall, wings folding at his sides as he did so.

“Sit,” he told Leaf, nodding solemnly to a spot in front of him. Leaf settled in front of him and would have had a nagging thought in her mind that this was not safe if she didn’t see Mark’s playful grin illuminated by the dim light above their heads.

“Ryan, back in the days, was pretty active,” the veteran began, his voice beginning to take on a tone that started to drift as though it was being carried with an unseen wind. “The front page was always hot, with new stuff being added twice a week. He would IP ban those n00bs that could not take “no” for an answer. He was, obviously, a very active Psyduck.”

Mark sighed deeply as though what he was about to say pained him mentally.

“But, like many older members, he got busy with real life, especially with college. As new Pokemon events started to occur, the news page fell behind, and we had to rely on other websites to find out what was happening with Pokemon. Members that always came back after they were banned had to be banned again and again because Ryan wasn’t here to just ban their IP. Just like that, Ryan had died.”

“He died?!” Leaf squeaked out, blood-red eyes wide.

“Nah, nah, I’m kidding,” Mark replied, waving a wing nonchalantly in the air. Before Leaf could glare at him, a serious expression returned to his features. “But that was our usual response whenever a new member asked us about our administrator. The forum didn’t die because he was not here, we have our moderators to keep things running. We soon grew used to not having an administrator, we just pretended he didn’t exist.”

Leaf frowned and asked, “Isn’t that kind of harsh?”

A sad smile played on Mark, an odd spectacle with his ferocious features.

“Thing was, if we kept on thinking that we needed Ryan, this forum would have failed in a few months. Despite the fact that we can’t appoint new moderators, forever ban those who keep on coming back, or update the news page, things are running smoothly, all things considered.”

The young Bulbasaur still look troubled, vines unsheathed and moving above her head in a questioning manner; they mirrored her confusion.

“But hadn’t anybody contacted him, talked to him about it?”

“Nobody knows him in real life, unfortunately, and he doesn’t get on any instant messenger.”

Noticing Leaf’s disappointment spreading, Mark stood up and leaned in close, a friendly smile on his beak.

“Hey, don’t fret about it. Ryan always come back, his absence is just longer this time around. Just go on and enjoy the forums, let us old geezers worry about him.”

The Grass type copied his smile and followed him out the door, back to the hustle and bustle of new members. When Mark bid her farewell, telling her to meet him for a chat in the Graphics Arts board once she got settled in, he left the girl to her own thoughts.
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Last edited by Phantom Kat; 05-16-2008 at 02:30 AM.
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Old 05-16-2008, 02:23 AM
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Default Re: The Tails of Ryan [Story Deal]

______

“So how did you find out about this again?”

The male Rhyhorn that had spoken looked up from where his bulky, clawed paws led him through the hall. The many layers of steel-gray stone on his body shifted noisily when he tilted his head to glance up at his phantom friend. The hall they were in was exactly the same as every other hall in the forum: mixed hues of azure and steel.

“I heard that this member, a Gastly named Horace, spammed by getting into all kinds of threads, even ones that were already locked,” answered the male Shuppet in front of him. “Demon_Child”, or “Salem” as he was most often called, was nothing more than a fluttering midnight-blue sheet. Beneath the point on his head, sapphire eyes that were mixed in with gold were sly and smiling. “Kind of sad people didn’t think of this before, but hey, most are too stupid to notice.”

“Championred94”, Red by those who knew him, nodded despite the fact that his friend could not see him. Red waited for Salem to speak, to elaborate on the plan he had briefly mentioned an hour ago, but the Ghost type did not utter a word. The sturdy Pokemon did not egg on his partner, he knew doing so would not provide him with answers. Salem was one of those people who loved to keep people guessing; he adored to reveal his plans just when things started to get mysterious. It was his way to control as much as he could.

Instead of trying to decipher Salem’s inner plans, the Spikes Pokemon decided to dwell on what he had been informed. Salem had heard a few months ago about the elusive moderator board, invisible to everybody except those who were charged with the task of keeping peace in the forums. Despite the fact that no normal member could enter it, the Ghost type was hell-bent on figuring where the sacred forum was located.

Apparently, a month ago, Salem claimed he had found where the forum was located through the means of hacking and chatting with people who knew too much for their own good. However, it wasn’t until a week ago that Salem had told Red this and that he knew how to access it; he guessed he wanted to keep it under wraps in case he could not find a way to get into the board.

“And here we are.”

Red blinked out of his reverie and stared up at the Shuppet, expecting to see some grand hallway illuminated by mounted brass lamps or something equally as impressive. He was sourly disappointed when he only saw the wall that signified the end of the hallway, the grey wallpaper seeming to mock him. Looking up at Salem, though, he saw the puppet smile wickedly.

“Perfect, wait here, Red.”

Salem drifted towards the wall at a slow pace, and before Red’s very eyes, stuck his clothed head into the wall, the surface of it looking more like water than plaster as he did so. Salem flew back, his whole body back in the open. The grin he had on beforehand had now grown to twice its normal size. His yellow and blue eyes were wide with glee, much like a kid’s on Christmas Eve; if he wasn’t flying, he would have been jumping.

“It’s there, Red, it’s there,” he exclaimed in an excited whisper. “It’s dark, but you can just feel the power, the authority. Come over here, and when I touch you, we’ll both walk in.”

The dumber of the two was a bit hesitant in doing so, but Salem had never put him in harm’s way before, he could surely be trusted.

Red trotted over to his friend and let the fluttering ends of Salem touch his craggy back. Immediately, he began to feel lightheaded, and his vision started to become hazy. With a snippy order from the Puppet Pokemon about what he told him earlier, Red straightened and took a deep breath. With a head jerk from Salem, the duo started to walk towards the wall, still making contact with each other; Red was happy that very few members ventured towards the “Other: Writing” section or else this would look like a very strange sight.

Immediately when they touched the wall, a cold wave washed over them like the Surf of a mighty Walrein. As Red was about to start shivering, warmth flooded his body again, and the notion was forgotten. Instead of dwelling as to why the change in body temperature came so fast, he opened his eyes (he didn’t even remember closing them in the first place) and took in the new surroundings.

Or the lack of.

The room was dark, darker than what Red had originally thought. He couldn’t tell the color of plush carpet beneath him nor of the walls around them. Coking his head upwards, he couldn’t properly judge the distance from the floor to the ceiling; it just looked like an endless abyss. The Rhyhorn would have kept looking into the never-ending darkness if a flicker of light wasn’t seen from the corner of his small eye. Turning, he now realized that torches were hung on the wall every few yards, the orange-yellow flames being reflected off the stainless, brass holders. Much to his dismay, they only let the light shed a couple of inches from the source, practically useless to anybody who did not know their way.

“I can kind see kind of well,” Salem commented from where he was hovering, mouth twisted into a frown as he leaned forward with squinted eyes; this was the time that his Ghost type came in handy. The aloft puppet came down with an ominous swish that was sucked up by the darkness around them.

“Just keep touching the cloth so you don’t get lost,” the Shuppet advised. Red inched closer until he could feel the soft fabric against his face. When he nodded, Salem nodded back and began to fly at a steady pace.

Much to their surprise, they didn’t need to slink slowly into the vast chamber. They dared not talk amongst themselves in case sound traveled easily here, and their footsteps were muffled almost entirely by the carpet that led their way. Occasionally, by the flickering tongues of the flames, the duo would think that they saw the outlines of doors as thin as the wall themselves. Unfortunately, with the overlaying darkness and the flowing flames that never seemed to stay at a standstill, even Salem was having a hard time in figuring out if they were really there.

Red was about to ask Salem if he thought that only moderators could fully see the doors, threads only meant for important eyes, but he held his tongue when the flying Pokemon shot him a sharp look. He was not allowed to speak, doing so might mean revealing themselves to anybody who happened to be here. This brought up another question to the Ground type’s mind: were there any moderators in the board at the moment?

How he wished he was a Psychic type so that he could ask these questions to Salem telepathically, the wiser of the two.

After what seemed like minutes of walking, Salem and Red heard the first signs of life: a female voice that argued with a normal but clip tone. Though Red could still not make out anything in front of them except a void of raven-black, Salem took a quick intake of breath and went to his friend’s side as fast as he could.

“Quick, to the right wall, and stay close to me!” He hissed into the Rock type’s ear, or what he assumed was his hear; he could not be sure with all the rock layers. Red nodded his bulky head and rushed after Salem to the right wall. They inched their way closer and the Rhyhorn member started to see what his specter companion did moments ago.

From what he could make out, a table stretched from where the walls ended to a good seven feet; the color of the piece of furniture was hidden by the darkness. Three figures, all in various sizes as seen by the light shed by the candle placed in the center of the table, were seated. Though the table itself wasn’t bathed in light, the moderators could be seen a lot clearer. As the trespassers huddled at the edge of the opening, bodies practically glued to the wall, one of the figures straightened. From the minimal lighting, they could see she was a sturdy, four-legged Pokemon who rose to glance at her fellow moderators. Her beige pelt was a great contrast to the large emerald, cut leaf that was situated on the top of her head and the foliage that ran around her neck like a natural necklace. Soft crimson eyes moved from face to face as her claws tapped on the floor and her short tail swished.

“Like I said before,” the Bayleef started, blunt snout moving from one member to the other to try and get her point across. “We should enforce the grammar rule more. There are too many members here using atrocious chat speak.”

One of the forms she was addressing audibly sighed, the forest-green leaves on her back rustling as she moved closer to the table. A giant salmon-colored flower dappled with white first came into view and then a blocky head. Her face and her entire body was a faded lime green, short, stumpy legs moving her enormous girth.

‘Thing is, Carly,” the Venasaur said gently, amber eyes closing for a moment as the Global Moderator tried to find the best way she could word the following sentences. “Most new members are very young, some as young as seven-years-old. Most of them haven’t been enforced rules like these, so they have no idea what we expect of them here on a Pokemon forum.”

“She does have a point, though, Sarah,” a tall figure at least six feet tall commented, craggy scales the color of grass scraping the table as she leaned on her elbows. She absently scratched her sapphire-colored belly, and her crest of spikes that stretched from her head to her mid-back moved as she titled her head. “Despite how young they are, new members should be responsible enough to at least glance at the rules.”

A light chuckle resounded, and all three of the females turned to the person who had made himself known. The grand canine, who showed his sharp teeth by the faint candle light, strode in with the elegance of a prince. His tiger-orange fur striped with onyx-black complimented his beige mane and the trails of fur that extended from his paws. As he came into view, firm snout held proudly, he told them wryly, “Ironic that the grammar rule is discussed by three authors.”

“FireflyK”, Carly, gave the Arcanine a raised eyebrow while “Pokemon Trainer Sarah”, Sarah, and “Tyranitar Trainer”, Jessie, shook their heads as one.

“Mike, I thought Neo was going to come to this meeting,” Carly said. She would have crossed her arms if she had any, but she instead settled on swishing her razor-sharp leaf from side to side, conjuring a swishing noise that echoed eerily in the room.

“Loyal Arcanine”, Mike, patted forward and shook his head.

“Nah, he said he had some stuff to do with LOUD, something about sabotaging Aqua’s base or something of the likes. Point is, though, we really can’t implement big, new rules or the likes without Ryan. Chances of him coming is the same chances as the Messiah coming, though.”

“Are you going to start saying something about us Jewish people?” Carly started with a tone that clearly said he had done the same numerous times before; a quirky grin showed that she took no offence.

Mike grinned one of his own grins, sharp fangs and eyes glinting like the ones of a Mightyena. However, it soon drooped until he was wearing a lopsided frown. Dark eyes grew serious, and he ruffled his mane as though something uncomfortable had pricked him.

“The thing is, we can’t do any major changes to the forum without him. Yes, we can operate well without him, but he’s he only one who can mod people and create new boards.”

“When was the last time we saw him?” Sarah wondered aloud, unsheathing a vine and using it to scratch her chin thoughtfully. “Two months, three months?”

Mike sighed but nodded. Salem and Red leaned in closer after sharing a brief look.

“Despite the fact that I respect Ryan’s decision about him being the only administrator, he is not around clearly because of college keeping him busy and all. Also, the possibility of him finding something else to occupy his time isn’t so unlikely. I’m surprise he hasn’t stopped paying for the site.”

Jessie smiled, but it was a weary smile that didn’t quite reach her eyes. “You always know how to depress us, Mike, even when you’re just speaking your mind.”

The Legendary Pokemon didn’t even crack a grin, knowing that if he did, it wouldn’t be a cheery one.

“It’s is true, though,” Carly stated, the leaf on her head now twitching. “I wouldn’t be surprised if most members don’t know who he is, let alone seen him online.”

As Mike shifted and Red followed his movements with his eyes, he caught a glance at Salem’s face; it was twisted into grin that clearly said something was churning in his mind. A twinkle of an idea was in the Shuppet’s eyes that made Red shift uncomfortably from one pair of paws to the other. It didn’t matter how many times he witnessed Salem coming up with an idea that was either absolutely genius or something that should have never been thought up, it still freaked him out.

The Ghost type slowly started his descent down, being careful he did not catch the attention of the moderators in the process. The live doll mouthed the words, “Back to the entrance.” and signaled with the horn on his head to the right direction; Red was grateful for this because it took him a few seconds to find out which way they had come from since the darkness was so oppressing and the candle on the table offered no light in their direction.

“… of course anybody would be surprised to see the good ol’ administrator back,” was the answer from a female voice, the room now too far for them to distinguish who exactly spoke. “He’s been gone for so long.”

Salem and Red trotted steadily back to the entrance, their pace speedier than the first time around in case the moderators chose to wander into the hallway. When they met a wall with nothing but dark wallpaper, the dimwitted Rhyhorn shuffled towards Salem and followed his friend through the wall while shrugging off the sensation of a million ants going up his spine.

A few blinks of his eyes later, Red found they were back in the hallway they had left behind. The china blue and platinum on the walls, doors, floor, and ceiling was almost blinding after spending quite some time in complete darkness. The Rock/Ground type shook his head to get rid of the spots that began to flood his eyes then looked at Salem. The question as to why they had left early was in his head, and he could now find out the answer. To his surprise, the blue-tinged Pokemon was breathing heavily, his body threatening to lean against the wall.

“I just didn’t know that doing that more than once could wear me out,” Salem told him as firmly as he could, floating back upright as he tried to regulate his breaths again. He stared at Red with the multicolor eyes that were as mischievous as a Murkrow’s yet twice as cunning. Apparently refusing to allow a shred of weakness to show, Salem puffed up his chest, acquired the haughty look he always had about him, and faced his companion.

“Don’t worry, I got all the information I need,” he started, answering Red’s unasked question. “And with your help, we can do the biggest trick this forum has ever seen.”

The Pokemon that was covered in slabs of stones blinked again, but this time, it had nothing to do with the light. Sure Salem would inform him about his latest plans, but he very rarely included him in them.

“I’m going to disguise you as a Psyduck with some of my energy, and then you’ll pretend being Ryan. Maybe we can get into some secret threads, or get some newbies to do stuff for us.”

“We?” Red asked confusedly, coking his oversized head.

“Yep, I’ll be invisible behind you, telling you what to do.”

Red wearily watched Salem as the mysterious creature started to circle him in a lazy pattern. The edges of the cloth whirled in an ominous way, his body seeming like a lost child wandering the world for some place to fit in. His eyes, on the other hand, were bright and shiny; they never left his partner even if he was forced to twist his head almost all the way around.

The Rhyhorn soon closed his own eyes, the sight of his friend gracefully flying around him making him feel queasy. A sudden spasm took over his body, making him drop to the floor. A sensation, one in between the numbness when a limb falls asleep and when a chilly wind had just swept over you covered him. Red shakily stood back up, and found with amazement that he could stand on his hind legs. When he reopened his eyes, he could see they were no longer heavy paws but flat, webbed feet the color of sand. Looking at his forepaws, which he could not put up to his face before since they were too short and stubby, he saw they were orange hands specialized for swimming. Red turned, seeing that he had a beige-colored bill, and saw Salem admiring his own handiwork.

“Not bad if I do say so myself,” the Ghost type commented, a sly grin on his felt face. Admiring the Rhyhorn-turned-Psyduck from the black hair on his bald head to the vacant look in his eyes (not that they were intelligent-filled before), he added, “Though I need to be close to you so that the illusion can hold up, I think we’ll do fine.”

“Why didn’t you do it on yourself, Salem?” Red asked with the most innocent tone he could muster; he did not want Salem to think he was unhappy with his job in the plan. His voice had a nasally tone to it, and he wondered if Ryan had the same problem or if the authority he had over the forum conquered this annoying attribute.

“I’m not sure if I can both put a spell on myself and go around following people after making us go into the moderator board; putting a spell on someone else is so much easier.”

If Red wasn’t too busy in surveying his new body, he would have caught Salem’s flicker of deception in both his gaze and voice. When Red turned back to his partner, the traces of lies vanished form the Puppet Pokemon, replaced instead by an encouraging smile.

“Come, I say we go to the “General Board” first.”
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Old 05-16-2008, 02:26 AM
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Default Re: The Tails of Ryan [Story Deal]

______

Leaf sighed, rubbing her emerald head with a thick vine. With the one that was free, she closed the door of the chat she had just left. It was her first time in the “Other: Discussion” part of the forum, and her temples already pounded against her skull as the first signs of a headache. The last chatter of people was abruptly brought to a stop when the door slammed shut.

She had just joined a chat about why homosexuals and lesbians (though the latter was less talked about) were treated so badly. Leaf had heard so many people say it was because they were wrong and a blemish to humankind that she had to bite the inside of her mouth to keep from saying something that would be considered a flame. Despite the fact that there were some people who actually discussed the topic in a civil manner, she just had to leave lest she do something she might regret.

“Damn my short temper,” she cursed herself, reeling back her vines into her huge lime green bulb and walking along the hallway. The steel-colored walls and the eggshell-blue carpet started to quell her sour mood. The Bulbasaur sighed loudly, thankful that she was the only one in the hall, and shook her head as though to send the bad thoughts flying from inside her cranium. She was just going to have to get used to these things now that she was getting more active in forums.

Leaf raised her head upon hearing a door slam shut, starting as the sudden noise reverberated in the empty corridor. Regaining her bearings, she focused on the door straight in front of her: the door that was used for both entering and exiting out of the “Other: Discussion” area.

A plump figure waddled in on two flat feet, his expression unreadable this far away. Leaf could tell, though, that this member was a Psyduck, and even from this far away, the Grass type felt an intimidating aurora about this new Pokemon. The Water type seemed to be glancing over his shoulder, but as though he was invisibly struck across the face, he whipped around towards Leaf and started to walk towards her with no hesitation.

“Hey, you, what’s your name?” Red called in an commanding manner, his voice ringing with authority. “I’m Ryan, the owner of this forum.”

As the Psyduck strutted over to her, Leaf noticed with a raised eyebrow that Red’s walk seemed to be uneven, and his body swayed from side to side as though his weight threatened to tip him over at any second.

“I’m… Le… Leaf.” The new member stuttered not from the glare she was getting from Red but from the goose bumps that rose on her skin like millions of Caterpie; she had felt the temperature plummet in seconds once Red had gotten near.

The duck Pokemon seemed to consult the air beside his shoulder for his eyes wandered from Leaf’s soft ruby eyes to the empty space beside him.

“Are you really Ryan?” Leaf asked in a skeptical manner, her brain telling her paws to move her girth backward, away from this Pokemon. A sense of something sinister and chilling stopped her; her body was forced to stay where it was. Instead of stepping back as she first intended, Leaf bit her lip and faced this “Ryan”.

To her surprise, Red seemed more taken aback than angry at this question. Wide eyes looked from side to side as though an answer to the Seed Pokemon’s question was embedded in the shiny wallpaper around him. Leaf scowled deeply as she saw the figure who stated he was a mighty administrator act like a child who had been caught with his hand in the cookie jar; her eyes narrowed even further when she thought she saw the air beside Red ripple like a sheet. When it did, Red seemed to regain some of his bearings.

“Of course I’m Ryan!” he cried indignantly. It was a façade, and Leaf knew it by the way his eyes darted uncertainly to his left side, the area in where the air seemed to move.

“No you’re not,” Leaf told him, getting back her own resolve as well. “So stop acting like it!”

Before Red could respond, Leaf shot as fast as she could to the right wall where a small red button was next to the door the imposter had come from. Hearing muffled steps running right behind her, she stopped three feet away and threw a vine out. The tendril ripped through the air with a shrill whistle, a dark green blur that pushed the button with a soft click.

The effect was immediate.

Locks on both the front door and the ones that belonged to the threads clicked as they were being securely locked by some inner mechanism. The multiple sounds that followed one after the other made Red jump back in shock while Leaf turned to face him.

“A moderator will be here shortly,” she stated, her breaths coming out in shorter gasps; this wasn’t due to the short run she had just taken but with the fact that Red had gotten her mad, boiling mad. For a fleeting moment, she thought she had the honor of meeting the great Ryan, the one who had made the forum she was growing to like. She might have talked to him, get to know him better, and have the opportunity to ask him exactly how things ran for who knew the site better than the administrator himself?

But Red wasn’t Ryan, not even close. In her opinion, he was merely a poor excuse of a member who liked to fool people for his own self amusement.

“A moderator will be here to ban you,” Leaf said again, eyes leveled with the male’s.

But Red wasn’t looking at her; his worried expression was directed to his right. The air rippled again, but this time, it began to take on a solid form. A head formed, along with a horn on the top, and the bottom resembled the fluttering end of a bed sheet. Eyes with the most brilliant colors Leaf had ever seen became present on the azure-colored body, but the expression from them that was also conveyed by the thin mouth was not one of friendliness.

“How the hell could you have messed that up, Red?!” the Shuppet exclaimed, multicolor eyes swirling with anger. He angrily flew around the Psyduck as he said, “A simple masquerade, a disguise that was fool proof! And what do you do? You blow it because of this stupid newbie!”

While Leaf bristled at the insult, the orange water dweller looked panic-stricken as he followed the phantom’s path.

“Salem, it isn’t my fault,” he told his friend, his tone on the edge of groveling even with the first words spoken. “I got nervous and then she wouldn’t buy it, and…”

Salem chose to ignore him, hard face never softening.

“Well, if you think I’m going to stick around to be busted by the local authority, you have another thing coming.” There was no guilt in his words, no shred of compassion; his last sentence was said with coldness that could have chilled the whole room if it could. “I’m going, catch me later if you can.”

Salem turned to leave, mouth clamped shut as he boiled in his own anger. Red opened his mouth, but it wasn’t until Salem flew to the wall nearest to him that he actually spoke.

“No, wait! I can do something, give me another chance!”

Red started running towards the ghost on all fours, unbeknownst to him. The toad-like Pokemon gaped in wonderment as Red transformed right before her very eyes. The moist, smooth skin started to wrinkle and swell until it became slabs of stone that began to take on the color of rough silver. Flat feet and small hands became clawed paws that held the massive weigh the was accumulating. The cream bill on his face started to melt into his face, helping the head to form into a more bulky form that held stones that nearly covered the small eyes that had shrunken in size.

The Rhyhorn reached the wall Salem headed towards a fraction of a second too late. The last of Salem’s lightweight body disappeared through the wall as Red slammed into it, the force of his run and his weight making the very hall rattle. The Rock type sunk down to the floor in a crumpled heap when he found that Salem was not coming back for him.

Leaf closed her mouth, blinking multiple times as her mind whirred frantically to make sense of the situation. This Salem seemed to be in league with Red, but the dumber of the two did not seem to fullfill his part. Was that a spell that had just worn off? Were members who take on a Ghost Pokemon form able to conjure…?

“EEEP!” Was Leaf’s startled yelp to the sound of a roar filled with mixed emotions.

With the help of the two vines she planted firmly on the floor (which she unsheathed when she confronted Red a moment ago), she jumped out of the way as the Spikes Pokemon rampaged towards her. She almost lost her balance as she slid to face him, eyes wide with shock at what had just transpired.

Red’s face was a mask of fury, the transition from sadness to anger amazing. He growled threateningly beneath the eyes that sent daggers flying at the new member. The stance he had taken after the blind run was sturdy and sure.

“Why did you have to be so damn smart?” He snapped. “Little Miss Newbie who thinks she knows more than us experienced members.”

Leaf glared at him as well, paws shifting into a stance that spread her weight evenly.

“You’re the one at fault, spammer,” she shot back, her small claws digging into the soft carpet as she felt the blood in her body rush faster. “And besides,” she couldn’t help but add with a smirk. “If you would have done your job correctly, Salem would still be here.”

Instead of retaliating with a retort, Red did it with a move. Arching his back, he jumped into the air and then let himself fall like a giant weight. When he hit the ground, two slabs of rock flew from his back like twin corks popped from bottles of champgene. Instead of falling harmlessly back, they seemed to acquire a mind of their own for they flew at Leaf like missiles. With astonishing accuracy, both pieces of stone as big as her head hit, the sound similar to that of falling bricks.

Leaf screamed out in pain, shaking her head as the rocks immediately turned into rubble at her feet once they had done their job. It felt like she had hit a cement wall headlong; the initial pain in her head spread and radiated throughout her body.

Growing more confident when the Stone Edge hit, Red snorted through his nostrils and threw himself at the Bulbsaur in a daring Take Down attack. He thundered towards her, paws madly pounding against the carpet with all the strength he could muster. The rocks that made up his body jingled and rumbled like the cargo of a pickup; the very floor seemed to shake with his power.

Leaf felt the ground beneath her rattle, trying to throw her off her balance, but she ignored it and stood her ground. Arching so that the emerald-green bulb on her back was fully in view, she concentrated and let energy flow towards it. The bulb started to glow a faint purple which soon turned into a strong violet as Leaf forced the process to go faster lest she be ram by the furious Red before she could release her attack. The opening of the bulb suddenly grew to twice its size, and before Leaf could blink, amethyst poweder burst free right into Red’s face.

The accomplice let out a short roar both because he was stopped in the middle of his devastating attack and the Poisonpowder was stinging his eyes. The affectious spores were not only imparing his vision, but they were seeping through the cracks of stone and let themselves be absorbed by the skin underneath. Red stopped his running, closed his eyes, and started shiver.

Leaf smiled, but then frowned as she thought about her next attack. Where woud she use Growth?

Red was starting to get back on his feet, his face set in stony anger. However, his eyesight was slower to heal, and he had to blink multiple times and shake his head for the powder to get off. The speckled reptile quickly glanced around, and when she saw the nearest wooden door, a crazy thougth occurred to her. She didn’t have time to thoroughly check it out, so she quickly scampered towards the locked door.

Instead of a poisonous powder bursting forth, chocolate-colored roots snaked from the opening of the plant on her back. Like skinny, inching fingers groping for the neck of a victim, they found the door and latched themselves firmly onto the wood. To Leaf’s relief, she could feel the dormant growth of the wood (despite the fact that it was virtual). With her elemental powers of Grass, she called forth these sleeping trickles of power.

She took a deep breath and felt her whole body throb pleasantly with newfound strength. As she exhaled, the roots pulsated, and when she inhaled, they thinned out to extract more of the plant life.

However, there was a cost for this stat-raising move: Leaf was too absorbed into building up her strength that she momentarily forgot her opponent.

The Spikes Pokemon finally cleared his eyes. Gritting his teeth as a stab of poison made his head throb, he gave a mighty bellow and ran towards Leaf with jaw-dropping speed. His pupils dilated and gave off an otherworldly glow. The same red sheen that was now in his eyes was also on his horn on the tip of his nose. The female Seed Pokemon snapped her eyes open, but the hefty monster was upon her in a flash of gray.

With only the Fury Attack in mind, Red thrust his head back and forth like a roaring Tauros. With the first swing of his head, he caught Leaf by the chin and snapped her head up. The Bulbsaur hit her head on the door with a terrble smack that made her skull rattle, and with the second hit of the horn, she was hit on her right side so painfully that she wheezed.

Amazingly enough, as Leaf was thrust two feet to the left, the roots that extended from her bulb to the door did not snap nor lose their contact with the dead wood. They merely grew longer and thicker, a comforting sight to the forest dweller for she could still draw needed strength.

Standing up, Leaf bit back a yelp of pain. Her right side was scratched, and it began to bleed a green/red liquid that ran down her body like spilled milk. Her eyes shifted from her injury to Red who had buckled due to the poison running through his system. Leaf bet that if his body wasn’t covered in stone, his skin would be a sickly color, probably mucus-green.

With the roots still stretching to the door, Leaf summoned a single leaf from inside her bulb. It shot out, and it was suspended in the air by an unseen force. A luminous jade, it was slightly translucent for it caught and reflected even the faintest traces of light. With a small smile, Leaf reared back and flicked her head.

The Magical Leaf followed her movement by soaring in a fluid manner through the air. As it rocketed and closed the gap between the two fighters, it began to twirl until it resembled a spinning disk; this conjured an odd tune that floated and haunted the air like an elemental specter.

The piece of foliage hit Red in the forehead and was lodged there. For a moment, Leaf thought the attack did nothing, but she quickly dispel this thought when Red began to glow a pea-green shade. The leaf, of its own accord, sunk deeper into the Rhyhorn’s head, causing the glowing aurora to grow stronger. Salem’s former partner shut his eyes, his breaths labored. He felt his energy draining into that accursed leaf; muscles everywhere in his body suddenly felt brittle.

Drawing one last string of energy, Leaf decided to end the ties with the door. With a small yank, the finger-like endings of the roots snapped off, and the rest of the roots rushed back into her bulb. Feeling slightly more rejuvenated, Leaf brandished her vines and rushed towards the weakening foe.

To her surprise, Red suddenly tood up on his hind legs and let his front paws fall on her. She only managed to dodge one of them as the right forepaw took the breath out of her when it it landed on her injured side. After Leaf tumbled somewhat, hissing in pain as she felt her ribs ache, Red heaved a sigh and dropped back as the heap he once was; the last Stomp attack must have taken more energy than he originally thought.

Growling in pain, Leaf cantered towards him and let her thick-corded vines fall as a violent Vine Whip attack. The horrible slap resounded in the closed hallway, and with that final hit, Red went fully down. His legs gave away, his head slunk to the floor along with the rest of his body, and he gave one final snort of pain.

Seieng that he closed his eyes and had no intention to open them again, Leaf dropped to the floor. As she let out a relieved sigh, she heard a slight tinkle of bells from behind her. Turning her head feebly, her skull throbbing so painfully that it made tears well up in her eyes, she made out a yellow form. Though the Grass type could only see a thunderbolt-shaped tail and pointed ears on the walking creature, she knew this was a Global Moderator by how the air seemed to part to let him through.

Tiredly closing her eyes, she wondered if the impostor she had just beaten was going to get banned.

______

Okay, I proofread this two times, it should have less mistakes than my previous story. ^^;

Note: Banned = captured ; Not Banned = no capture

Pokemon: Rhyhorn
Min. Characters: 20K - 30K
Total Characters: 48,184K
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Last edited by Phantom Kat; 05-20-2008 at 12:47 AM. Reason: I take ONE look at it and I find a typo >>;;;
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  #4  
Old 06-01-2008, 05:54 PM
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Default Re: The Tails of Ryan [Story Deal]

I had it done then I hit backspace when it was saving and I had to re-type it. @_@

Story/Plot:
Okay so Bulbasaur is new to PE2k and she doesn't want to do anything wrong, she ends up meeting a Skarmory, a matured vet. He helps her get through the first steps of becoming a new member and getting settled into PE2k. He then tells her about the admin missing and not being active. The forum just went on not knowing or caring about him really, though some people said he was "dead." Two "evil" Pokemon at the forums that they called spammers were up to something bad. Shuppet, one of the evils, turned his partner into a Psyduck, to look like Ryan and try to take over the forum or something. Then Leaf saw throught the costume and battles they Rhyhorn after Shuppet left angered.

Interesting, never read a story that's setting was in PE2k. Really they don't have much to go off of, but for the most part I really did like what you did with this story. You made the bulge of it about the two bad Pokemon, even if the more main character was Leaf. That isn't really a bad thing, but usually the first character introduced is in the story a lot more. But besdies that the story was very well thought out and made. The spammers/trolls trying to make PE2k havic was very interesting, this whole story was being that I've never read anything like this kind of story... so just about anything would've made me happy to read about. :P

Something new to a grader is always a plus, things that surprised them too. I had something on my mind but I can't catch what it was I was going to tell you. Though, surprising the reader is always a complete plus and makes them want to know more about everything. Putting a background on the characters like you did with Leaf being a total noob at another forum was a very nice background to the character. The more that is known about the characters to the reader the more they can connect with the story... which makes them enjoy it all the more. And I think the fact that using actual members of PE2k made it so that I could know what they were sort of thinking at times.

Eh, this was better than most plots and since I've never read anything like it - as I've said about 50 times now - makes it sooo much better and exciting to read. More different the plot it makes the more better read since if it something completely different that no one has ever read before they'll want to read it more so they can get the story and understand it with complete ease. Something that's repeated over and over isn't really fun to read. Different is always good. ;)

Introduction:
I really liked the beginning of this story. You made it so that I knew about Leaf and how she acted before. I knew that she was afraid because she was called a noob before on her last forum experience, but now she was older and more mature and knew how to act. Putting in something that makes the reader either really exciting or really wanting to know/have more is what you're aiming to do in the beginning of the story. Make it so they don't want to keep reading, but they HAVE to keep reading and can't stop without complete being forced to stop.

I mean, this was pretty perfect, but I could see you having it a bit more exciting or more mysterious and not just flat out. Just something to ponder on!

Grammar/Spelling:
Good, really. I wanted to point out those little small mistakes though. Most people say those aren't very important, but with someone like you that doesn't make very many mistakes, I want to point out those little things so that you know what to look for when you're proofreading so that you're story it virtually mistakeless (or, flawless, whatever :P).

Quote:
(she had even gone as far as changing her username from “thebesttrainer1331” to “Phantom_ Leaf”).
I think you put a space on accident after the underscore. :o

Quote:
‘Thing is, Carly,” the Venasaur said gently,
Just missed a key I supposed you'll want " not '. ;P

That's really all I could see that was anything that you would want to fix, though it's not big. Just something for you to watch out for in the future. :P

Length:
You should add a Pokemon on for yourself in these long story deals. XD

Detail:
This was... beyond good. XD You just made everything so seeable... if that's a word, but I think you get what I mean. If I could say anything about your descriptions I would just say that you need to calm down on them and save yourself sometime and shorten the story a bit with taking out some of them, or adding something more onto the story and having yourself a slice of the pie. Really I can't say much on this because it's so perfectly made out.

I can see that it would be hard to describe the... internet, you did a very good job on that, I was surprised on how you did it and how you would've done it in the first place even. xD Making an odd description that isn't really seen in real life is always okay. Making up a description because it's just impossible to be seen in the real world, that's okay and you seem to know that. Good job here, I can't say much because it's so... good. D:

Battle:
This was very good too. Why must you make everything hard to critic? X_X But honestly, I can't say much about this either. You did everything you are wanted to do. And since they were practically in a white space with nothing else in it, I can't see them using the surroundings or anything. You made this story everything that use graders could ask for, putting in some dodges here and there. Making the attacks vivid and not boring at all. Everything was just perfect and I couldn't see you improving on this at all.

Kudos, kudos, kudos. I can't say much about anything more, this was just fantastic!

Final Outcome:
Must I really say anything more. This was just awesome, you did everything we would want you to do. I'm serious when I saw: Add something on for yourself when you write story deals. All your stories are so long and they could have something else added onto them and you'd still easily capture. And with that, Rhyhorn captured!

This story proves that...

FAIL TROLL IS FAIL
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Old 06-01-2008, 06:08 PM
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Default Re: The Tails of Ryan [Story Deal]

Yipee, I like making the plots as cool as I can. Basic plots just bore me, and if I did something like "kid walks into forest", I'll probably never finish it for lack of interest. I want to do more Pe2K stories in the future so watch out for that. Ype, and I can also see my introductions being more mysterious so thanks for pointaing that out. =)

I saw the 'not' mistake but I didn't fix it because I was lazy, but I should have just to spite you. xD Nah, but seriously, I love it that my grammar is getting so much better, it used to be horrible. =x

I'm a description/battle nazi 'cause those are my favorite parts in a story. =D

And maybe I should add another Pokemon for me in my next Story Deal. Hehe, first I worry the story is going to be too short, and then it turns out logner than I intended. Hehe.

Thanks a lot for the grade, Jr! Really apppreciate! ^^

-goes to post in the trading thread and then continues watching Death Note-

- Kat
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