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Creative Writing Share your fan fiction, stories, poems, essays, editorials, song lyrics, or any other related written work. All written must be your creation. Start a new thread, and keep replying to that thread as you add on more chapters. Anyone can join in at anytime.


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  #1  
Old 11-19-2008, 02:35 PM
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Default Betrayal [PG-13]

BETRAYAL
BOOK ONE OF THE DESTINY TRILOGY








Heroes are what keep civilizations moving.

They create a sense of safety and relief for the average citizen, and create someone to look up to for those intending to achieve record highs. When a hero is born, everyone treats him with love and respect, for they know he will be what keeps the world moving. He will be the one who stands up and confronts evil head on, daring it to come closer. He is the avatar of good and right, and upholds justice. And because of this, the worst possible blow upon society is the loss of a hero. The death of one so pure and so righteous. But society is wrong. There is a blow that is even worse. There is a blow that can rip the hearts out from even the boldest of men. The blow of treachery.

When a hero, for so long thought to be the one to protect mankind suddenly falls from his podium, and takes up ranks alongside the enemy, alongside the evil which he once fought. This is the blow that Kanto had to suffer when their hero turned his back on the country he once fought for. The name of this hero is now blasphemous, and anyone speaking of it in awe is considered as much of a traitor as the hero himself. What, you ask, is the hero’s name? I shudder to speak it. But for the sake of you, dear reader, who will hopefully read this tragic tale and feel sorrow for those shoulders that it was placed upon, I shall tell you the traitor’s name.

Ash Ketchum…








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Old 11-19-2008, 02:36 PM
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Default Re: Betrayal [PG-13]

PROLOGUE: SIBLING LOVE



The spirit plane.

A vast, multi-coloured land where time has no meaning, and only the most distinct take form. A limitless place where even the abstract can be seen as swirls of bright colours. Where love and hate move around in spirals, where good and bad mingle with each other. It is here that all that is unseen in our dimension resides. It is here that they call their home. Most things are naught more than swirls of colour, like some part of an abstract artist’s painting. But those that are important, those that play a role in how life works, they all have a distinct form.

Nature can be seen as a maiden of outstanding beauty. Life can be seen as a man standing tall, light flowing out of him. Death can be seen as a hunched figure, draped in a black cloak, and seeming to absorb all light given out by Life. But there are two creatures that have forms even more distinct than all the rest. They are two halves of what together creates the wondrous being that is God. They are brothers. They are enemies.

The first takes a form of a magnificent deep purple bird, with a wingspan enough to rival an aircraft. The underbelly of this first half of God is a shade lighter than the rest of his body, bordering on lavender. His eyes are a dazzling crimson red, which seem to evoke emotion, whether happy of sad. His beak, too, is lavender in colour, and sharper than anything known to mankind. The deadly sharp talons that tip his scaly feet are similarly sharp, and similarly dangerous. His name is Aforan.

Aforan’s brother is just as dangerous, if looking completely different. The brother resembles a creature form myth and lore: a dragon. His emerald scales are hard and nigh indestructible. The only thing known to have pierced them are the talons of his brother. His wings are just as long as Aforan’s, but made of a leathery sort of material, and much more fragile. He makes up for this with four thick, sturdy legs, tipped with claws of sharpness equalling that of Aforan. The dragon’s tail is muscular, and able to lash out at unseen speeds. His mouth is full to the brim of rows of razor sharp teeth. His name is Eliadon.

They are brothers. They fight.

Every. Single. Moment.

Such is the life of God. For if they got along, the horrors that they could muster are beyond the fragile imagination of humans. In fact, it’s beyond the fragile imagination of anything alive…




Author’s Notes: And so it begins again

Deathspector
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Old 11-19-2008, 02:42 PM
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Default Re: Betrayal [PG-13]

I disagree with the concept of Ash Ketchum. -nods- Of course, that doesn't mean the story won't be good, but if it's a good story, it'll probably be completely OoC.
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Old 11-19-2008, 02:45 PM
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Default Re: Betrayal [PG-13]

Quote:
Originally Posted by skiboydoggy View Post
I disagree with the concept of Ash Ketchum. -nods- Of course, that doesn't mean the story won't be good, but if it's a good story, it'll probably be completely OoC.
Ah, I knew there'd be a few people with that view. Still, you'll understand it...like way at the end. ><;

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Old 11-19-2008, 03:04 PM
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Default Re: Betrayal [PG-13]

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Originally Posted by Deathspector View Post


Ah, I knew there'd be a few people with that view. Still, you'll understand it...like way at the end. ><;

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Well, good luck with that then.
Even if it is Ash. Why is everyone fanficing bad stories?
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Old 11-27-2008, 06:18 AM
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Default Re: Betrayal [PG-13]

CHAPTER ONE: VERMILLION




Ash Ketchum’s Point Of View


At last, it was in my sight.

The beautiful, seaside town of Vermillion. I remembered it well from my days as a young badge-collector. The first time I set my eyes on this city, I didn’t even have time to marvel at its natural beauty. I was in a hurry, as I had always been when young, off to collect my next badge. Sometimes I regret not taking longer on my journeys around the world, as I missed out on so many wonders. But I learn from my mistakes, and now, I’m going to make the most of everything I’m fortunate enough to see. Which, considering the mission I was granted with, would be a hell of a lot from now on.

Perhaps you ought to know why I’m returning to Vermillion when there is no badge for me to collect. I passed out of my badge phase a long time ago. After thirteen, badges started looking fake, and the number you collected could hardly be enough to merit how strong you were. There were some Pokémon Trainers who spent their lives living with their Pokémon, and they could take on any badge-collector and win hands down. No, after thirteen, I wanted to do something worthwhile. For a while, before I turned eighteen, I worked for the government, taking up position as Leader of Viridian Gym. I thought it would be worthwhile to help other young children achieve the dream I once aimed for. But after a while, Gym leading seemed very lame to me. It seemed almost fake, being forced to use the weakest of my Pokémon so that the opposition had a fighting chance.

So when I turned eighteen, I decided to leave my Gym, leave working for the government, and join an organisation that did some good to the world. And then I found them. They named themselves the League Of Shadows, and at first I thought they would be the next Team Rocket. But then I realised that they strived for something no Team Rocket would ever work towards. World peace. Their leader, who because of the controversial feelings towards the League of Shadows felt he ought to hide his true name and went by the alias of Lord Apocalypse, believed that world peace had not yet been achieved was because the world was still divided into countries, each seeking their own glory. At first, Lord Apocalypse appealed to the general public, explaining to them his point of view, and how the entire world should come under the rule of one person, so that rifts would not begin. Immediately, the various governments placed him under arrest for conspiracy against all the nations, but before he could even be thrown into jail, he escaped.

Since then, he has operated the League of Shadows in secret, and it was then that I joined them.

Ever since that day when I signed the contract, I have been made to do various missions and have risen in the ranks of the League. Now, I am Lord Apocalypse’s number one field agent, having more successful field missions than any other member. I have convinced scores of people to join the ranks, and kidnapped many government agents before they could put their terrible plots and schemes into practice. But now, Lord Apocalypse requires me to do a job unlike anything he has ever asked of me. It is a job that could very well result in my death if not carried out with extreme caution. But what’s more, is it’s a job that would alert the world that the League of Shadows was no longer going to sit back and watch as the planet was destroyed with wars and battles. No, they were going to start an uprising. A rebellion. But before that, they needed power with which to start this revolution, and that is what my job was. To gain that power.

What spurred me on wasn’t so much the fact that world peace would finally be achieved – although that was a great thing – but that I would be able to walk the earth as a free man. The minute I showed the world openly that I was siding with the League of Shadows, I was named a traitor, and a fifteen million dollar prize on my head, second only to the twenty million dollar price that was for the capture of Lord Apocalypse. But once the revolution took place, and the League of Shadows seized control of, first Kanto, followed by the rest of the world, I would no longer be a wanted man, and could walk around freely with my head held high instead of hiding under an alias as I was doing now. For the moment I became a wanted man, Lord Apocalypse created a new persona that I would follow. He named this new man Samuel Redwood, and fashioned myself a new appearance.

Instead of my hair being, like it used to be, long and spiky, it was now cropped very short, and kept that way. Almost as if to make up for this loss of hair, I was made to grow a rather wonderful and bushy beard and moustache to obscure my face. This was then followed by a piercing to my ear from which dangled a Salamence fang earring, and a set of three sunglasses that Samuel Redwood always wore. My clothing style was then changed, and I now appeared as what people called skaters. This was also adequate as I did know how to use a skateboard reasonably well, and I felt comfortable in the clothes that I was being made to wear. Maybe I would continue with this appearance even after the revolution.

Stop counting your eggs before they hatch, Ash. We have a job to do, berated a voice in my head. Of course, it wasn’t my conscience, but rather the telepathic voice of my little Pikachu who was curled up rather uncomfortably in a brown backpack slung around my shoulders. It would have been big enough for Pikachu, but that backpack also contained my skateboard – something that Lord Apocalypse had insisted on me carrying – and a load of other rubbish that I didn’t really need.

Oh stop being such a wet blanket, I replied jovially. Pikachu and I had long since developed a telepathic connection with each other, and as far as I knew, we were the only human-Pokémon couple to do so.

Someone needs to be the brains around here, mumbled Pikachu unhappily; besides, you’re not the one squashed up in some stupid bag, are you?

I sighed. No one asked you to come along. Lord Apocalypse said that it would be better if you didn’t, because a Pikachu would be too much of a giveaway to who I really am. Instead, you insisted, and had to go in the bag because you’re not allowed to show your face.

Pikachu grumbled, but I blocked the voice out of my head as I made my way over to the Vermillion gates, which would grant me entrance into the city. As I neared the iron gates flanked by two thick marble pillars one of the two guards on gate duty walked up to me. He was dressed like any Vermillion guard in a khaki uniform, and had a sub-machine gun belted to his back. I only hoped that he wouldn’t have to use that gun on me. The guard stood in front of me – and it was then that I noticed how tall he was; funny how these things happen when you don’t want them to –, saying, “Name, business in Vermillion and your passport.”

This was expected. The League of Shadows had already, effectively taken over Cinnabar, Saffron (where the headquarters were, although no one knew that), and Pewter, and the other cities were putting up more stringent security rules, as if afraid that the League of Shadows would take over their cities. Of course, that was the eventual plan, but not yet. First, I had a job to complete. “Samuel Redwood’s the name, sir. An old friend of mine stays here, and she asked me to visit, so I thought I would. Never been in Vermillion, see?” I replied.

“Passport,” the guard grunted, holding out a rough hand.

“Right – sorry about that,” I slipped off my backpack and zipped it open, careful not to expose Pikachu who was inside, while trying not to look too suspicious. I then pulled out the purple Kanto passport and handed it over to the guard who grabbed it with an invitation, and opened it to the first page.

“You come from Saffron, eh?” he asked, and I nodded. “Don’t nod at me, man, speak up!”

Anger flared up inside me, but for the sake of the mission I was going to apologise when his partner guard who was still standing by the gate spoke up. “Give the man a break, Fred. Poor guy looks like he walked all the way from Saffron. He’s tired. He’s given you what he wants, so now let’s let ‘im in.”

Fred glared at the second guard before grudgingly nodding – the hypocrite – and together with his partner opened the gate. From behind the metal doors, the wondrous city of Vermillion opened up in front of me, and as I stepped within the borders, a gust of gentle sea breeze tickled my face, and made me feel calm. I walked as quickly as I could without looking suspicious, and was soon well into Vermillion. I turned back to look at the gate, and watched with no slight apprehension, knowing that as it closed, I was being trapped in this city until I could complete the mission I had set out to do.

Where to now? asked Pikachu as I hitched my backpack higher up my back, and looked around at the evening hustle and bustle of Vermillion.

I guess it’s off to the Pokémon Centre to get myself a room. After that – well, we have to wait for night to fall, I replied. Once I’ve got the room, I’ll let you out of there so you can have some fresh air.

Thank you, came Pikachu’s answer, gratitude flowing through his mind into mine. I smiled.

+++

Vermillion was one of those rather rare cities where everyone went to sleep very early. Probably it was to do with the fact that they were once a fishing village, and to be a successful fisherman, you have to go fishing early in the morning. Sleeping early was in their genes, and as weird as it seemed to me, even the teenagers were home and in bed by nine o’clock. For most of the day, I sat in my Pokémon Centre room, reading a book, and watching Pikachu over-indulge himself with beverages from the mini-bar. I had to stop him drinking his fourth can of beer; otherwise I’d be calling up room service to clean up vomit from the floor.

“Right, you,” I said audibly, now that we were out of sight of the public eye, “I think that’s more than enough. Off to bed. We’re going to have a long night ahead of us, don’t forget.”

Sod off.

At that, I physically picked him up and plonked him down on the bed beside me, wrapping him up in blankets so tight that he couldn’t move. Sighing, I returned to my book, and was soon lulled to sleep by the oddly calming noise of Pikachu’s snores.

+++

I woke to the annoying beeping of my wristwatch. I glanced at its luminescent screen, and got up, yawning in the process. It was ten o’clock, and about time that Pikachu and I headed off to Vermillion port to implement our plan. Stage one had been getting into Vermillion, but that had been the easy part. Stage two was the difficult part, and I knew that the longer I put it off the harder it would be. The first thing I did was to change out of my “skater” clothes. I replaced them with fitting jeans and a tight top, both black in colour. The tightness of them both would help in manoeuvrability, and wouldn’t obstruct my movements, as baggier clothing would have. I slipped on a pair of black sneakers with ankle guards that would, again, help me to move with ease, before completing the look with a heavy trench coat that dragged across the floor. Opening my backpack, I pulled out my poké-balls and attached them to my waist, before pulling out the more difficult object to explain.

It was a sword placed in a deep purple sheath, it’s hilt silver with a large amethyst embedded at its tip. Admittedly, I felt odd carrying a sword in this day and age, but it was vital for the mission. I attached the sheath to my belt, and hoped that the size of the trench coat would disguise the fact that I was carrying a medieval weapon until it was necessary for me to expose it. Having made sure that I didn’t look out of place, I went to wake Pikachu up.

This was, if possible, even more difficult to do than to think about walking around Vermillion with a sword. But it had to be done, as Pikachu was my strongest Pokémon, and more importantly, my firmest companion. All the others that I had made friends with on my long journey as a badge-collector had now deserted me, but Pikachu remained true and loyal, something that made me pleased to think about.

After a lot of grumbling and crackling of electricity, I finally got Pikachu to open his eyes, and once that was done, it was an easy job to splashing his face with a mug of ice-cold water to wake him up.

Ouch, my head hurts. I don’t think I’ve ever had such a nasty headache, mumbled Pikachu as he stumbled around the room.

“That’s what we call a hang-over, and it’s what happens when you drink too much alcohol. I don’t see what you like about beer, though; bloody horrible drink, that,” I replied, smiling at the way Pikachu was walking in circles. “I hope you get better in the fresh sea air, because I need you to have all your wits about you when we begin stage two, okay?”

Pikachu nodded, and scampered up my arm, with some difficulty, and sat there regally, looking around with drooping black eyes. The Nurse Joy who did the night shift looked at us oddly as we walked through the lobby. I tried my best to remember what Lord Apocalypse had told me to say, and said it the best I could, “My Pikachu here just evolved from a Pichu. I thought if I took him out to the beach now, he could get the chance to fight some of the nocturnal water Pokèmon like Krabby and such.”

She nodded, satisfied, and we made our way out of the Pokémon Centre without much incident. The journey to the port was just as uneventful, but the moment I stepped out onto the pier, things began to heat up. As my trainers made clicking noises along the pier’s wooden planks, a thick hand grabbed my shoulder, and swung me around. The hand belonged to another Vermillion guard, as he was dressed in the same khaki uniform, and had the same sub-machine gun on his back. I knew that I couldn’t let this guard see what I was doing, but for the time being, I let him do his duty.

“Just what d’yeh think yer doin’ out here at a time like this?” he asked, his accent thick, and his English not the best.

“I thought I’d train my Pikachu against some Krabby. He’s quite young and inexperienced, and I thought it would do him good,” I replied, hoping I sounded innocent.

“Go and train somewhere else, you ‘ear?” he snarled. “This is Government land ‘ere, this is. Trainin’ is forbidden unless you ‘ave Government permission.”

I nodded, “I’m sorry, sir, I didn’t know that. I’ll go and find another spot to train at.”

As I turned away, the guard’s eyes suddenly glinted. “Oi, you there! What d’yeh think yer doin’ with a sword, ey?”

I knew I would have to take him out, and I did with much pleasure. I ran at him, and before he could react, I stuck him with the side of my palm across the temple. He collapsed immediately, uttering no more than a barely audible grunt. I knew it wasn’t enough to alert any other guards, so I walked away from him quickly. Once I had reached the waterfront, I gazed out at the moonlit ocean, and just stood there for a moment. This was it, the end of a normal life, and the beginning of a dangerous and deadly task that could end my life. I sighed. This is what I wanted.

I plunged my hand deep within my trench coat, and withdrew the sword, watching as its silver blade glinted in the moonlight. I looked at Pikachu who nodded. I raised the sword above my head, and began to chant the mantra…




Author's Notes: I wrote that chapter about...a year ago. You MIGHT recognise changes in my writing style. :P

C&C always welcome.

Deathspector
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Old 11-28-2008, 11:41 PM
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Default Re: Betrayal [PG-13]

Yep, I remember this story. Interesting concept, but I've never liked Ash Ketchum's character. However, the idea of making him take the walk to the dark side is definitely a good one.
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Old 11-29-2008, 12:17 AM
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Default Re: Betrayal [PG-13]

Actually, I've always adored Ash Ketchum. He's always confident and such, and he really is the icon of the show, aside from Pikachu. However, it's really interesting to see how far you can take his character. With him on the dark side and all, I'm sure we'll get to go deep into his mind and experience the vivid thoughts of his character, and Pikachu's.

Great start, and you've definitely got yourself a reader.
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Old 11-29-2008, 03:56 AM
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Default Re: Betrayal [PG-13]

Quote:
Originally Posted by Neo Pikachu View Post
Yep, I remember this story. Interesting concept, but I've never liked Ash Ketchum's character. However, the idea of making him take the walk to the dark side is definitely a good one.
Ash's original character in the anime always attracted me, not because of what he was, but because of what he could be. I didn't much like the typical anime male protagonistic characteristics he had about him, but he's one of those characters you an really play around it. Far easier to change than say, Misty or Brock.

Nice to see you back for this round, though xP. The plot hasn't changed much so you'll have to bear with me, but I feel I've improved writing-wise.

Quote:
Originally Posted by SuperBoy View Post
Actually, I've always adored Ash Ketchum. He's always confident and such, and he really is the icon of the show, aside from Pikachu. However, it's really interesting to see how far you can take his character. With him on the dark side and all, I'm sure we'll get to go deep into his mind and experience the vivid thoughts of his character, and Pikachu's.

Great start, and you've definitely got yourself a reader.
Oh, you have no idea how deep I go into his mind. xP

It'll take some time for his actual character to fully form, but I'm pretty sure that as a fan of Ash, you might like it.

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Old 11-29-2008, 04:17 AM
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Default Re: Betrayal [PG-13]

Oohm. My mind is a tad drained at the moment so I won't waste your time trying to compose a coherent compliment of any kind.... Suffice to say that I shall be reading.

~IGC t DM+
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Old 11-29-2008, 04:30 AM
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Default Re: Betrayal [PG-13]

Quote:
Originally Posted by Scourge of Nemo View Post
Oohm. My mind is a tad drained at the moment so I won't waste your time trying to compose a coherent compliment of any kind.... Suffice to say that I shall be reading.

~IGC t DM+
Works well enough for me. =P

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