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Old 02-04-2011, 04:02 PM
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Neo Emolga Offline
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Default Re: The Role Play Forge - RP Creation Teamwork

@ dualismlover, The Final Conspiracy

Definitely a good start, but I’d be undecided as to whether I’d take part in it myself. I think it could use some cleaning up, flesh things out a bit more, and that kind of thing.

First off, the racism aspect is unique, original, and interesting. Truthfully, I would keep that and I honestly don’t think it really needs that much adjustment since you can play a lot off of that. However, everything else after that gets a little sketchy.

To me, using Team Rocket/Aqua/Magma, and so on is taboo when it comes to RP originality. They’re cookie-cutter villains, they’re not bright, and they have a glorious history of one epic failure after another. Whether it’s the anime or the games, they’re always the losers to the good guys, their plans never work out, they never have the good guys at their mercy for long, and they’re terribly unorganized, reckless, and haphazard. You’re better off basing your crew of villains from evildoers that seem to never lose as opposed to always lose. That, and it would be better to make them an original faction.

The other aspects that need to be a bit more detailed are the motives. Why exactly would Team Rocket be interested in Sententia? What do they have to gain by overthrowing a developed community of Pokémon? To me, it almost sounds better to toss away Team Rocket completely. Let the whole plot be based on internal corruption on behalf of the Pokémon government itself. The corrupt officials could fake a disaster to remove the Guildmasters and deceive the general public. What they do with the Guildmasters could be up to you. They could stage a series of assassination uprisings and blame it on the guile dark types or the scorned poison types, even going as far as framing particular individuals that have shady histories and lack of alibis. Or, they frame the Guildmasters for being collectively involved with a heinous crime, are blackmailed by the corrupt government to admit and testify to it or their families will be endangered, and are imprisoned or publically executed as the government takes command. In either scenario, the corrupt government can use the public outcry and hysteria to distract the public from their true objective of seizing control of the artifact. However, even with the public mislead and deceived, there are informants that are risking death to let others know the truth, but not everyone believes them. Meanwhile, the racial tensions make it difficult to determine who is trustworthy and who isn’t. End result is the RPers could be a part of the government conspiracy and gaining control over the Pokémon of Sententia “for their own good,” or they could be on the side of trying to uncover the truth regarding the lies and the deception, and figuring out what really happened to the Guildmasters, whether they’re really dead, imprisoned, or maybe even brainwashed. Case in point, you don’t need Team Rocket in this, especially considering it seems you want to keep this as a Pokémon-only kind of RP without human involvement. You could even set it so that Sententia is its own world like the PMD games where the Pokémon have much more technology than the settings of PMD Blue/Red Rescue Team and PMD Explorers of Time/Darkness/Sky. All up to you, but I think this would be the better layout.

In terms of the artifact… you really need to answer what this thing actually is, what exactly it does, and how it came to be with an interesting and original history behind it. You could also answer why it was broken into four pieces, and a good answer to that is because the artifact is so powerful that those who created it regretting every creating such an overwhelmingly powerful device, and when they tried to destroy it, they were only able to break it into four pieces at most, and decided to scatter it across the world in hopes that no one would try to reassemble it.

One hypothetical example of something you could use is a gold medallion with runes, sigils, and inscriptions called the Infinity Disc, which has a central orb that looks exactly like a miniature glass replica of the world itself. Essentially, whoever completes the disc and has control over it can essentially become Mother Nature and Father Time. Something like that could have been created by an ancient group of mystics to dissolve natural disasters, but instead was used to cause them and used to overpower anyone who didn’t follow the ones who had command of the Disc, hence why it was broken in pieces and scattered across the world.

In all, it’s a pretty decent RP idea, a map might help it, or you could use one of the original PMD maps, put city locations on it, and say the RP happens in the future than from the era of the games. Up to you, but I think these would be good ideas to keep in mind.

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