Re: Back to the Crystal Fortress - The Unowns Return (mild language)
I wish this would get more feedback.
But nevertheless, I keep writing.
Hope you enjoy the next chapter.
WARNING: mild sexual themes.
Chapter 9: Wallace Vs. Y
“How did you get here!??” was the first thing Wallace said, or shouted, to the girl in the
“Normal people actually say ‘Hi’ when meeting a new hum- I mean person,” the girl shot
Straightforward attitude, thought Wallace, as he took notes in his mind. And real smart.
“Oh. Sorry,” said Wallace.
“Yeah, you should be.”
“Uh huh. So let me start again..”
“No. Say hi first.”
Wallace squinted at the girl, who looked about 16. She was wearing a blue and white
striped twopiece and purple sunglasses. Her strawberry-blond hair just reached her
shoulders, glinting in the blazing sunlight, and her skin was moderately tanned.
Nice insisting personality, he thought. I’ll play along.
“Okay. HI,” grinned Wallace. She’s hot, said a random thought in his head.
“There you go. Impolite hum - I mean CHEEKY DUDE.”
“Right. So why are you here?” Wallace finally got the chance to ask.
“Here?” said the girl. “Of course. I’m on vacation.” The moment it escaped her lips, she
knew it was lame. Goddammit, P, you didn’t give me a good reason, she thought.
“Uh. But it’s just you and me.”
“Oh.” The girl smiled sheepishly. “Well, this is my secluded tanning spot, if you must
know,” she replied after a pause.
Wallace stepped back. “Sorry if I’m ‘trespassing’, or whatever,” he said. This is the “threat
to leave” part, he thought. Just say it, and she’ll want you here.
“Nah,” said the girl. “You can stay here. I’m a bit lonely sitting here all alone.”
And so Wallace sat down.
“What’s your name?” he asked.
“Me?” said the girl. “I’m Yvonne.” (Ladies and gentlemen, guess which Unown this is.)
“I’m Wallace,” said Wallace. “Nice to meet you, Yvonne.”
Yea yea yea, thought Y to herself. Why the f*** do I have to be a hoe??
“You too, Wally,” smiled Yvonne with a wink. “It’s really nice to have some company.”
Hot, thought Wallace. This girl’s definitely the flirty type. Perfectly compatible, he thought
But I still have to find out what’s up with this whole place, he continued thinking. Well,
maybe I’ll ask more astute questions.
“So...” he began. “How do you come here, usually? I don’t see any real entrance.”
“See that staircase over there?” said Yvonne, gesturing to the right. “I go down there from
my house and come here.” Wallace looked to the right. In the far distance, he could see
something that looked like a staircase. He realized that he couldn’t be bothered to distract
her and go over and try to escape.
“You know anything about a crystal fortress?” he asked. Great, said his inner voice. Not
too astute, is it?
“No,” said Yvonne. “Why?”
Since I’ve blown it already, thought Wallace, I guess I’ll just keep asking.
“You know anything about Unowns?”
Sure do, thought Yvonne. What’s more, I am one. “No,” she said. “Why’re you asking
these weird questions?” She took off her sunglasses. Her bright blue eyes matched her
She’s right, Wallace thought. I’d better forget the whole thing and concentrate on
impressing. “So… you single?”
Aw great, thought Yvonne. Now he’s trying to flirt with me. Hey, I wonder what will happen
if I suddenly turn back into an Unown. One, he’d freak out. Two, P would murder me.
Better not try it.
“Sure am,” said Yvonne. “You?” She winked mischievously.
“Nice going, Y,” said P through the transmitter. “Do you have a degree in drama or
something? I love your acting.”
“Yeah, I’m single,” said Wallace. “What, you actually think I’d have a girl?”
“I would think so,” replied Yvonne.
Oh yeah, she’s definitely hot for me, thought Wallace.
“So…” He continued. “What do you like doing?” Don't be shy, he thought.
As he said this, he caught his gaze shifting down unconsiously. He blinked and shook his
“You know, Wallace,” said Yvonne, tilting her head seductively. “You’re not exactly subtle.”
She was actually starting to have fun, watching this helplessly lovestruck human.
Wallace felt his ears burning like they were being flamethrower’ed. “Uh…” He stopped
when he saw Yvonne’s gaze shifting downward and he felt his ears on fire again. The fire
was quickly extinguished, however, when he saw that Yvonne was actually looking at the
pokeballs on his belt.
“So, you’re a trainer?”
“Yeah, I’m a gym - ” He stopped. Bragging was bad. “Yeah, I’m a trainer,” he said.
“Fancy a quick battle?” asked Yvonne. “Just for fun.”
“Sure, girl,” said Wallace. You ain’t too subtle either, he thought.
Yvonne stood up and raised her arms. As Wallace watched, the water rose with her arms
until it washed over the land. It didn’t stop there though – it kept rising, and soon the two
people were underwater, and there was no trace of the beach they were on a few seconds
GAHHHH! I’m gonna die, screamed Wallace’s inner voice. But then he found that there
was no strain to his lungs and that he didn’t feel the urge to breathe.
“Woah,” said Wallace, both in awe and suspicion. His voice sounded normal under
water. “Are you SURE you don’t know anything about Unowns?”
“I’m telling you, no,” said Yvonne, slightly annoyed. (You can probably guess why.) “So
how about two pokemon each?”
“Sure. Fair enough.”
5 second pause.
“I don’t really think this swimsuit is suitable for a battle,” said Yvonne. “I need to change…
could you turn around, please?” Y laughed on the inside. This is pretty fun, she thought, as
Wallace flushed a deep red.
“Just joking,” she said. “Though you might want to change… It IS an underwater battle
after all.” After a short pause, she added, “Thought I can’t be bothered to turn around.”
Wallace flushed again. He had never met a girl this straightforward. Maybe even more
than straightforward. She’s going a bit… fast.
“Sorry if I’m going a bit fast,” whispered Yvonne as she swam closer to him. “You’re just
so – ”
“All right, Y,” snapped P into the walkie. “You’re pushing it a bit far. Get back into
storyline. Though I have to say, I’ve never seen such an actor. Actress, in this case.”
“Right. Never mind,” said Yvonne as she pulled away. “So two pokemon each.”
“Go, Milotic!” said Wallace. He threw the premier ball to the ground (because unlike on dry
land, pokeballs actually float through water) and in a flash of bright green light, Milotic
flew out. This is my best pokemon, he thought smugly. Maybe I’ll be easy on her…
“Right,” said Yvonne through her walkie. “He’s probably going to lose on purpose. So what
pokemon do I use?”
“Cradily,” said P. “I told you he specialized in water pokemon. So use grass. And by the
way, Cradily is the only grass pokemon that can exist underwater, it’s a barnacle. Oh, it’s
the green pokeball to the left.”
“Cute pokemon,” said Yvonne. “Just like you,” she continued, winking.
“Go, Cradily!” she shouted, throwing the green pokeball to the left.
“Crap,” muttered Wallace.
A towering sorta-plant burst out of the ball. Cradily had 8 suction tentacles that rooted to
the floor the moment they touched. The pink petals surrounding its head bore a particular
“Wha…? Isn’t that a fossil pokemon?”
“Us Unow - I mean elite trainers have our sources,” said Yvonne, even more smug than
It’s Grass and Rock type, remembered Wallace. That’s 4x weakness to Ice Beam. He
“Milotic!” shouted Wallace. “Ice Beam!”
Milotic whipped its tail. A blizzard of ice crystals expelled from the open mouth and hit
Cradily square between its eyes.
“Goddammit, P!” whispered Yvonne. “Cradily’s dying over here!”
“Patience, Y,” said P. “I trained these pokemon. It’s impossible to lose.”
“There’s no time to brag, you idiot!”
“Use Giga Drain. It sucks HP out of pokemon, and adds it to your own.”
“Nice move,” said Yvonne. “Cradily, Giga Drain!”
Cradily raised its tentacles, and firmly suctioned it to Milotic’s long body. Yvonne watched
with a smile as Milotic slowly became weaker, its head drooping; while Cradily was back
to life again, roaring and once again rooting its suction cups to the floor.
“Crap,” said Wallace again as he watched the energy being sucked out of his prize
pokemon. His first thought was to give the evil plant another Ice Beam. Then he thought
of Milotic’s suffering and his promise to be easy on Yvonne…
“Come back, Milotic!” he shouted. “Go, Sealeo!”
Sealeo flipped through the water as the pokeball opened. Being Water and Ice, thought
Wallace, Giga Drain isn’t super effective.
“Red pokeball to the far right,” said P. “That’s Electrode. Watch out, it’s prone to explosion
in water. Normal humans faint at full exposure, but you’ll turn back into an Unown,
blowing your damn cover.”
“Affirmative,” said Yvonne.
“Who’re you talking to?” asked Wallace.
“Dammit, Y, a bit loud,” whispered P.
“No one,” said Yvonne hurriedly. “Go, Electrode!” she shouted.
It seemed like she was throwing a normal pokeball – then Wallace realized that the
pokeball had a face. 2 seconds were spent to trying to make sense of it, then he saw it
was coming in his direction and dodged the crackling Electrode just in time. here was a
loud spitting noise, but luckily Electrode did not explode.
“Electrode, Rollout!” commanded Yvonne.
Electrode recoiled, aimed, and rolled towards Sealeo forcefully. The impact sent Sealeo
reeling onto its back.
“Nooo!” shouted P. “Use Thunderbolt. That’s super effective. Nice going, you just lost a
“There’s always someone who’s never pleased,” grumbled Yvonne. “Electrode,
At the same time, Wallace shouted, “Sealeo, Ice Beam!”
But Electrode was faster than Sealeo. Sparks flew out from the now furiously vibrating
pokemon, and they formed together to make a bolt which flew at Sealeo. Just then,
Sealeo let out an Ice Beam from its mouth…
The two attacks slammed into each other, fusing rapidly…
If it had waited another minute, Yvonne would have won. If it had waited for the whole
battle, at least no one would be hurt. But it was right at that moment when Electrode
“AW GODDDDDDAMMMMMMMMMMMITTTTTTTT!” screamed both Wallace and Yvonne, as
Electrode burst into electricity, which conducted through the water…
And suddenly, they were back on land. Electrode was all right, grinning cheerily at the two
people lying on the white beach. Wallace, however, was knocked out and Yvonne was 2
hp away from turning back into an Unown.
“Nice work, Yvonne,” said P. “Abduct him, now.”
But Yvonne seemed to have something else on her mind – she was staring blankly into
the distance. Then, on impulse, she bent over and pressed her lips to Wallace's in a passionate kiss.
“Wtf….” sputtered P, staring in disbelief into the screen.
“Thanks,” Yvonne whispered. “That battle was the most fun I ever had in my whole boring
life.” Then in a flash of pink light, the girl and the beach were seen no more – Y the Unown
was back, and this time with a light-blue bubble.
Last edited by Shiny Loser; 04-10-2007 at 10:22 AM.